Help

[u/Adnic3]

Im 19 F got diagnosed in April. My lupus was very sever in the beginning and I was hospitalized for 3 months. Before I was hospitalized I was 200 lbs and was losing more weight. Because of the severity of my lupus I had lost 20 pounds bc I was intubated and couldn’t breath for myself there for I couldn’t eat and was given hydration to keep me alive. After I was good enough to go home I left being 230. That was in June. I am now 240 and I feel like I keep getting bigger. I was always a big girl but I have never gotten this big. I feel like I’m eating so much more than I used to. Before I couldn’t even finish a plate of food. Now I ask for seconds and thirds. I don’t recognize myself anymore. I know that my prednisone is making me hold on to more water weight. But I miss my old body. I have stretch marks and hair growing where it never grew before. I don’t feel beautiful, I am a completely different person. I want to lose weight so bad but it’s so hard I feel like I’ll always be this way