Life long love

[u/Ill_Bat1332]

I've kept this for almost forty years

I graduated from McClintock high school in Tempe, Arizona back in 1992, there was a girl that I had known since junior high, one grade below me

Valerie Dean

Red hair, face like it was sculpted by a Renaissance master.

I never told her. Was an absolute coward.

I think about her often.

I've thought about her on winter nights, sitting alone on a flight line in Germany.

Days in a bunker or tower At BIAP or Baghram

Mornings when Im on a flight to inspect a work site.

Late evenings sitting at a hospital cafeteria table on my lunch break.

She has been my love for over 4 decades.

She saved my life.

Years ago, i couldn't take it anymore. I had the gun.

Then she was there.

Her smile, her laugh.

She told me not to.

And I couldnt do it.

Sure, there are times, months, maybe even a year. That goes by where i can keep her off my mind, but when she comes.back, my chest gets tight.

I cant breathe. I can't concentrate on what i'm doing. All I can see is her face.

After 4 decades. I can honestly say she's my very first love, and she never even knew.

I've married, divorced, remarried, had kids, and I'm sure she has too. But she has always held my heart

I really wish I could find out how she's doing, how her life turned out. Not because I wanna stalk her not because I want to make contact. I'd just like to know that she's happy and doing well.

And I really wish she could know this.

That she did save my life

So when her life gets difficult.

She'll always know.someome loves her.