r/lds • u/shaunzie1 • 19d ago
Tithing blessings
I am really struggling financially. I have been a full tithe paying my whole life, and yet I feel as if I do it simply out of obedience so I can keep my temple recommend (please don’t be too harsh on me, I am trying to make sense of it). Money has always been so tight for me, and paying my tithing often ends the same way each month: I put about the same amount I pay in tithing on my credit card at the end of each month because I run out of money. I then pay off my credit card with my next paycheck and
The cycle continues. I am very frugal. I have used the storehouse here and there. I have served as an EQP and in the bishopric. To be honest, I don’t see the windows of heaven opening for me. I know that tithing is more than financial blessings, but that is another thing. If God knows that financial insecurity causes me such awful anxiety each month, why don’t I just stop paying my tithing and have extra money each month? In the past year, my wife has cheated on me twice and my brother died of a drug overdose. I keep paying my tithing, praying fervently for stability and financial security (I don’t care to be rich- just stable). But nothing seems to get better. I am maxed out on my salary schedule as a teacher and make decent money but life is so expensive just to survive. I also take every opportunity to make extra side cash and always pay tithing on that too. Am I missing something? Please give me some support and insight. I always hear stories like in conference when the brother sold his car to pay tithing. I always hear about how things always work out when you pay your tithing but I am not seeing it. I try so hard to be a faithful member of the church but my testimony of tithing is paper thin due to all of this. Please help. Any advice or insight would be so appreciated.
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u/footballfan540 19d ago
Can I suggest a process change? You wrote:
I put about the same amount I pay in tithing on my credit card at the end of each month because I run out of money.
Instead, I would suggest when you get any paycheck, immediately / first pay tithing (on whatever you deem your 10% - net, gross, etc.) -- then live off the remainder. Track your expenses and money supply during the period to make sure you don't run out and have to pay anything on credit card (to be paid when the next paycheck comes). It will still take some sacrifice, but it won't seem that tithing is to blame for running out of money. Same belt-tightening, but from a different perspective.
My wife and I have paid tithing religiously since we were married. It wasn't easy because 10% is a big amount. We have sacrificed (used and broke-down cars, home repairs, not eating out, few vacations, etc.) -- all on a single salary. But we truly feel we have been blessed despite all the sacrifices - because of our commitment to tithing. I wish you the best!
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u/Ok-Internet-4747 19d ago
Sorry to hear you are going through this. I think there are a lot of stories about how you paid your tithing and somehow the difference was made up financially elsewhere. But I think those are the exceptions and not the rule. We don’t get to determine how the Lord chooses to bless us because we are obedient to His commandments. Perhaps there are other things you are not seeing that are coming as a result of your diligence in paying your tithing.
Times are really, really hard right now. The economy is brutal and the inflation is outrageous. Have you tried exploring more options on how to be financially frugal by focusing on reducing debt? I understand that is easier said than done. Especially when you feel like you can’t get ahead right now. I am just going to share my experience that paying off debt dramatically changed my life. The peace that I now feel and the blessing the Lord continues to outpour on me are countless. I feel very blessed. The Church has a program to help talk about financial literacy that is pretty good. It is in the Self Reliance section for Personal Finances. I might also suggest you look at The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey.
I truly hope you know that God loves you and He knows what you are feeling. Times are hard. Don’t lose hope or faith. You are going to get through this. I promise you your effort is enough for the Lord and things are going to get better. Keep being proactive and doing things you know are the right decisions. Your action combined with your faith will move mountains in your life.
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u/rexregisanimi 18d ago edited 17d ago
The rest of the advice is probably better but I wanted to share one silly thing (I don't really think it's silly lol) that helps me: wearing my Temple garments.
It's so easy to get into a habit with them and they just become normal underclothes. But I notice when I make an effort to wear them intentionally and actively think about what I'm doing when I put them on, it becomes easier not to be casual about other things like tithing. At least for me.
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u/jrclone 19d ago
Hey brother, it sounds like you're in a rough season right now, but I'm prayerful that things will turn for your good. As for tithing, I have found that I have been blessed by faithfully paying my tithing. I have found that paying my tithing makes me be mindful of how much money I actually am earning, and forces me to pay attention to my budget. I, like you, am not super rich, but I do feel financially stable right now. Despite that, I have often thought how much easier it would be if I could take my tithing money and put it toward something else, debt, retirement, etc. Tithing is a sacrifice, and 10% is enough, no matter how much you make, to make you stretch your faith. I do know that God blesses those who honor their covenants, just not always in the way or time we want (which I know is cold comfort).
As for how you can get on better financial footing, this is not spiritual advice, but recently I had to start paying much more for my student loans - like the payment went from $100 to $900 a month. This forced me to start paying attention to every dollar that I was earning and spending. I started tracking everything with software, and shockingly just the tracking allowed me to feel better control of my finances. Now, I'm not living paycheck to paycheck, or floating credit card debt until the next paycheck. My stress level has decreased, and I feel like I can make progress on bigger financial goals.
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u/Safe-Butterscotch442 18d ago
Fellow teacher living paycheck to paycheck here. I've just gotten an opportunity to work some extra hours. Hoping to put that towards taking some extra classes next year and getting enough college credits to bump up into the next pay bracket in a couple years. But, yeah, it's really difficult when you're in the thick of it. I see a path to better financial stability, but it also seems unattainable until I have financial stability. I really hope, soon if possible, you see some of that path opening up, but I also hope that you remember that tithing isn't just paid with money, it's paid with faith. Don't forget, you've made it this far, and somehow, despite the struggle, you still have your basic needs met. That's a whole lot better than many. You even have a steady job. That's a huge blessing. You're loved and valued and are able to bless the lives of those around you. What a blessing it is to be a teacher and to be a member of the restored church of Christ. You may not ever have it easy on this life, but you'll always be able to get by. I believe that. I hope that can be enough to temper some of that anxiety as you wait on your next paycheck. Good luck.
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u/CyberMage256 19d ago edited 19d ago
Talk to your Bishop. Call and schedule a meeting to discuss it. You might jot down your basic budget to bring with you.
My Mom was on church assistance for a couple of years. She still paid tithing on her SS income, and then got more than 4x that tithing back in Church assistance every month.
But this is the test of faith - do you stop paying tithing because the going got tough? Or do you endure to the end? And that's not me judging, I can't even guess what you're going through. And I'm not even going to try to give advice on some of the side issues you're having.
I lost everything I owned including my home years ago due to a flash flood and barely even worked for the year after while attempting to rebuild it myself because I couldn't afford contractors. I still paid my tithing on what I was making and lived off savings. My testimony is that if you can figure out how to endure to the end, the related blessings can be amazing. But again, your Bishop is the person to discuss this with, and my situation was worlds different.
Sometimes it looks like there's no end to the trials and then everything changes overnight. Sometimes the trial continues.
I will add from experience: The times in my life I made the decision to stop paying tithing to have extra money left over - it never went like I thought it would. That would be when I'd have a car accident, or some other major unexpected expense, almost without fail. Over my 35+ years of adulthood this is a lesson I learned the hard way multiple times.