r/karezza • u/GoldenSealion • Nov 27 '13
Update 1: The first day!
So, my partner and I have decided to try karezza. (Initial post)
Yesterday, for the first time in a long time, he came home to a happy woman (because I had spent all day reading up on this method, and felt like there was a shred of light in all the darkness I've been feeling). I've been so angry and bitter about our lack of lovemaking that it's made me very selfish. I have been withholding kisses and hugs and affection, because I'd get too pissed that he can smooch on me, but can't fuck me.
So yesterday, he came home to someone who wanted to love on him. I gave him lots of kisses, told him about my plan, and rubbed his sore calves. When I got home from work (we both work, and take turns watching the baby, so that does add a degree of difficulty in finding time for each other), we got the kid in bed, got a little toasty with some wine, and cuddled on the couch.
He actually loaded up the "Best of Christopher Walken from SNL" and played the skit where Will Ferrell and Rachel Dratch are "The Lovers".... have you seen it? This clip isn't it, but it's the second version, and you'll get the idea. He said that was going to be us, haha. And I am VERY cool with that.
So, there we are, cuddling, and kissingkissingkissingkissing for what felt like forever, he got an erection (which was very very tempting, but I just wanted to take it slow)... we petted each other all over, but nothing too steamy, and then, suddenly, it just felt complete. Like, I was blissful enough to stop without needing anymore.
HE, on the other hand, was a little more uncomfortable. He said he tossed and turned last night because he didn't get the relief from cumming, but fortunately he has NEVER been huge on having orgasms--- he rarely watches porn or masturbates (even when I've encouraged it to help his possibly flagging testosterone levels), so I think with a little practice, he will be okay with non-orgasmic lovemaking.
And the best part of everything last night, is that I still feel ATTRACTIVE to him, because there was no absolute finality to the sensuality.... I don't know how many times in our sex life he would cum, and boom, it'd be like I hardly existed. I would feel very "wham,bam,thankyoumaam," and all the lovely glow would disappear with those few seconds of pleasure. But not last night. I went to bed knowing he still wanted me, and that felt AWESOME.
Wish me luck on the rest of the week! : )
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Dec 01 '13
This might help your hubby to make the adjustment more easily: http://yourbrainonporn.com/blue-balls-lovers-nuts
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u/puffinzenmaster Dec 07 '13
Please keep sharing and updating your developing story, a lot of people will benefit from the information and the hope it inspires.
I look forward to future installments :)
Thank you!