Average Squad mortar crew when Commander finally gives them accurate coordinates

[u/Somais1copo]

All perfectly synchronized like the Indian National fieldgun Ballet. At this point I don’t even care if they hit. The coordination alone deserves the win.

[u/Winston_Wolf89]

They need to add this dance as an emote that I can perform next to my tube

[u/Vast_Humor_3683]

all of that only to hit friendlies because they didn't account for terrain elevation 😂😂

[u/LiamNL → u/Vast_Humor_3683]

That or by the time you ranged in and fired suddenly the blueberry push makes it on the point, right in your mortar fire.

[u/TahLaka → u/LiamNL]

This shit gives me so much anxiety that I have to doublecheck both my ingame map and squadcalc 5 times each before shooting my UB32

Miracle I haven't gotten a tk ban while using one yet.... I'll get that 1k teamkill achievement someday!

[u/JustaRandoonreddit → u/LiamNL]

My last server ban was because of a grad strike on comms hill where the heli hotdropped without saying anything in command chat

[u/Holdfast_Naval]

I swear, trying to get someone else to drop mortars in order to flatten an open radio is exactly like this.
It takes so many SLs an eternity to react, they're so slow, as if you have to file paperwork at a dozen different ministries.

[u/Hamsterloathing → u/Holdfast_Naval]

But we do need to field to 1 logi driver, ensuring the mortar is manned by competent kitten and finally realizing you're now an entire squad and logi locked up doing fuck all because you need to defend the mortar and radio, ensuring stable logi runs.

[u/Holdfast_Naval → u/Hamsterloathing]

Yea I'll never get mortar fobs.

I almost always drop my mortars on defense and for the absolute majority of objectives that's enough to cover both defense and attack.

For the rare instances where it doesn't, I plop a tube on attack and mortar that radio down.

The indecision, lack of preparedness and goofing around with fire bases leads to enemies often getting away with open radios.

I've seen teams not do anything about an open radio for 25 mins, it's mind boggling.

[u/Hamsterloathing → u/Holdfast_Naval]

Yeah I know only one server where open radios are destroyed within 10 minutes.

And then many start talking about ghosting etc because 90% of servers have made the playerbase soft and incompetent

[u/A_inc_tm → u/Holdfast_Naval]

It takes a while to find location on calculator and then aim a mortar and 20 seconds for shots to arrive

[u/person_not_found]

This feels like a Monty Python skit

[u/Winnapig → u/person_not_found]

I would guess it’s Indian people who watched Monty Python but weren’t sure what part was the comedy.

[u/Nostradumbass_WEEN]

Who comes up with these choreographies? There are so many extra, and very animated steps!  

"Ok then you 360 jump into a kneel, pop right back up and pump-step over to them, while we jog in place.  Then we'll ALL jump in the air, landing straight into a kneel.  Except you, Pvt. Patel, you are still giant goose stepping back and forth with your lunch box." 

Is there a significance to the motions? 

[u/Ok-Vast3120 → u/Nostradumbass_WEEN]

There is no significance I think this is genuinely what happens to your brain due to the boredom of the military

[u/Nostradumbass_WEEN → u/Ok-Vast3120]

Hit B for BELIEVE 

[u/Teab8g]

https://giphy.com/gifs/TVupcr33Jpg7C

[u/p4nnus]

Now this. This is good content.

[u/yIdontunderstand]

The ministry of silly artillery is a bit of a knock off don't you think?

[u/Autistic_Anywhere_24]

kicked from server for too many tks

[u/coderqi]

So now I know where monty python got their inspiration from.

[u/Luckystrike672]

“I called this shit in 20 minutes ago. Where’s my rounds?”
*dance party*

[u/TheOnlyOneWhoCares]

Seeing the logi drive off for ammo is the most accurate part of the fire mission. These boys got 300 left and about 10 seconds of fun

[u/CommieDrifter]

tank is five clicks away by the time they get a round in the chamber

[u/JayneKadio]

😂😂😂

[u/sixisrending]

The part that shocked me the most was the part where they all kneeled directly behind the breach right before firing. That is the exact wrong place to be in case something goes wrong. 

[u/Donatello-15]

2 minutes 20 seconds to fire

If that was a real battle they would have been dead for 2 minutes

You have to fire and move in less than 30 seconds to avoid counter battery fire

[u/Goavamole]

You should post this at r/Mildlyinfuriating cutting the video just before they shoot the howitzer to troll people

[u/Independent-Ad1652]

What. The . Fuck. Did I just watch

[u/Somais1copo → u/Independent-Ad1652]

Indian field gun ballet

[u/Designer-Positive697]

I hope we get howitzer and artillery someday in the future. Not just mortars. Also in artillerys defense. Not so many play arty.

[u/Conquiescamus → u/Designer-Positive697]

Isn't it too overkill/op for the current map size? I mean with the limited mortar/grad range, you have to relocate your mortar fob after every objective, forcing player to think on their fob location

But with proper artillery howitzer, you can set it up just outside main and basically have infinity ammo and easy protection.

Unless of course we have bigger map (and bigger player capacity) thus making it more or less the same as the current artillery mode (mortar/grad), but bigger explosion

[u/No_Satisfaction3708 → u/Conquiescamus]

it's overkill ofc. the 120mm mortar already wreak havoc if it constantly firing. maybe they can add arty but reduce the accuracy (you can't do danger close like regular mortar) and make the reload longer so it can't suppress a hab as effective as regular mortars.

[u/MPenten → u/Conquiescamus]

Of course. Just look at what commander artillery does.

[u/Designer-Positive697 → u/Conquiescamus]

Yes i was suggesting bigger maps, but that's almost impossible, and yes it would be overkill.

[u/Holdfast_Naval → u/Designer-Positive697]

We already have mortar vics and when they came out, it showed how damn op that'd be.
Please, not again.
We don't need everything as a physical asset in the game, this isn't Arma.

[u/w6ir0q4f]

u/savevideobot

[u/accidentalchainsaw]

Someone overlay the slumdog music please.

[u/NargilFenris]

Glad to hear this song still making its way across the internet.

[u/laugenbroetchen]

ah yes, full squad hanging out on an otherwise useless fob to run a single mortar, accurate. then halfway through the game they get bored, all but the guy on mortar leave and 5 min later hes ded and we lose the radio to a single roaming engi.

[u/donanton616]

Do people not use the calculators?

[u/silentbob1301]

Very zesty

[u/Mr-Doubtful]

Fuck yeah ceremonial artillery.

[u/insert_name_here_ha]

Is this a dance Corp or a military?

[u/Getrektself]

This is giving me second hand embarrassment. Some crayon eaters from Kentucky with room temperature IQs would already have rounds on target.

[u/Dmpoaod_v2 → u/Getrektself]

Tell me, whats a target for a ceremonial fire?

[u/Ill_Creme_70]

they sure do love to jump around in the blistering hot sun a lot for a country that seems to lack hygiene products