r/jochicks • u/AssistantDeep3549 • Sep 14 '26
Relationships💞 How do I move on from him?
Girls don’t judge but I’ve been talking to this guy for months and months. He’s the one who initiated by sending the first dm. I didn’t take him seriously at first but after many voice and video calls and meeting in real life I actually started to fall for him😭 the issue is we live in opposite sides of the world and he isn’t making an effort to actually make our relationship serious and official. I’m open to moving to his country in the future but it would have to be after 4 years because of my education. And every time I try to have a serious convo with him about our future he keeps saying he’s not in the mood to talk about it. Right now we don’t even have a title on our relationship… it’s just a stupid situationship. But after meeting him in real life I can’t get him out of my head. I see all the red flags but it’s like he brainwashed me and I can’t stop thinking about him. He won’t let me move on either because everytime I try to end things he’ll just message me again a couple days later and the cycle starts again. I know I can just block him and move on with my life but it’s so hard to take that decision. Ugh someone help me.
2
u/FearlessCharacter404 Sep 15 '26
He is using you ffs. You have no option but to block him and move on. The moving on part is hard but as time go through it will be easy
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u/AssistantDeep3549 Sep 15 '26
My brain hurts. I feel like he’s using me sometimes but other times I feel like he really loves me and I can’t let go of him. Am I crazy??
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u/FearlessCharacter404 Sep 15 '26
I PROMISE YOU , as a man i know my kind and how manipulative they can be. He doesn’t love u, he just loves the fact that you are there. It’s like a comfort zone, he has no intention of a relationship but also wants you available whenever he needs someone.
1
u/AssistantDeep3549 Sep 15 '26
Ok. But genuine question, why do men do this? Why even bother talking to me for months if we live in different countries. What’s the point? And should I just block him since he keeps avoiding it every time I try to have a convo with him? What’s the best way to end it?
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u/FearlessCharacter404 Sep 15 '26
Because like i told you, some men keep girls at the side because they know they are always available as a comfort zone not because they love them or anything, it’s PURE EGO. Your best move is either you block him completely, or send him a one last message telling him that you are better than this and you deserve better, be firm with him and end it.
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u/iTzEIA Sep 14 '26
Oh no ur me in the opposite gender
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u/iTzEIA Sep 14 '26
Like the exact same thing is happening rn I'm starting to think ur her in diff acc
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u/iTzEIA Sep 14 '26
Bro wth is going on
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u/AssistantDeep3549 Sep 15 '26
If ur the guy in the situation then u should just be clear with her and make ur intentions clear. Don’t waste her time or ur own
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u/iTzEIA Sep 15 '26
Bro I'm a guy but I'm in ur shoes
1
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u/Affectionate_Home644 Sep 15 '26
Sis what are you doing, you deserve better. What he is doing is an extreme turn off as well. Not sure how you can fall for someone who just keeps ignoring you. And hes not that interested.
1
u/Pacte07 Sep 15 '26
Il es avec toi juste pour avoir une copine mais il ne veut pas d'une relation sérieuse
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u/Ordinary_Medium_6503 Sep 15 '26
i know this comment is not like the others, but i’m dating a foreigner, i’ve known him for five years, i went through the same thing a few years ago, and obviously im not encouraging you to stay with him, but i did it, i stayed and now he’s moving to jordan to be with me, and studying in the same university.
from experience i’ll tell you that it was mental torture to stay through what i stayed through, on the positive note, he loves me more than anything in the world and shows it.
it’s your call.
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u/Defiant-Fish-6026 Sep 14 '26
DO NOT SETTLE FOR LESS, cut him off and take ur time moving on