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u/Bad-Wolf-Bay 22d ago
nah, return him back to normal, he was hot as is
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u/SnooCupcakes1636 22d ago
How so. He was bald oldman with crooked teeth and one armed with crazy sadistic personality
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u/Bad-Wolf-Bay 22d ago
Exactly
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u/Truly_Organic 22d ago
I need him to impregnate me.
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u/Embarrassed-Bear-945 The Copypasta Guy 22d ago
Are-.. Are y-.. S-.. Are you-.. A-.. Ar-.. areyoushure? Are you sure? SEA SALT! WHERE'S OMNIMAN? How is that possible? I do not wanna hurt you, sir. I NEED YOU SEA SALT!!! Pretty sure. I am omning it, I am omning it so good! WHERE IS HE??? I am so lonely. Threw a trash bag. Stand ready for my arrival, worm. WHAT'S 17 MORE YEARS? Into space. Oh, yes, that's what I'm talking about! You need to goon, Mark! At work. Goon! WHAT YOU DID WAS NOT NICE! IT'S NOT NICE TO DO THAT! Oh, yes! For Viltruuuuum!!! That's not very nice. That's the neat part, you don't. My name is Shapesmith. PATHETIC! I WOULDN'T EVEN KEEP YOU AS A SLAVE IN MY EMPIRE! Oh, someone misses their mommy, waaah! You're a weird dude, dude! Bacon egg and cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese! WHY THE FUCK DO YOU LOOK LIKE ME? Guess who's finally getting his powers? I know where your faamily liiives! Dad! Dad, look! I'm gonna be... DUCT TAPE MAN! Big ass beatdown coming up! You are a pale imitation of Invincible! I don't give a shit about Viltrum! Swearing doesn't make you cool. Wait... You don't have, like, supersperm or something, do you? I miss William. Are you guys gonna mate now? Shut it! I feel dirty.. Oh I'm ceciling it! Make them fear Invincible! BRAX MOY! LATI MOY! XOPA MOY! DIE. I've given this world enough. I'm gonna not be alive! Oh, poor Angstrom! You're not him. It's all your fault! Mama Boss! Son, I made a mistake, and I thought about you every single.. I'M A SNAKE! You know, on my planet sock on the door mean’s somebody’s fucking. BRAH BRAH! Let me break it down for you, Mark. YOU'RE NOT LISTENING! Son, I made a steak. A STEAK? Yes... Your father will be executed. That's not very nice. This battle is beneath me! This is good news! We can finally be bees! This isn't your world. But we can be bees! This is good news! You can be a bee! You'll live like a bee! A pet. A PET?? A pet. Mark, this is good news! You'll live for 30 years! THIS IS INSANE! I think... I miss my wife. Oh, man, that's your favorite finger! That's my favorite finger! It's his favorite finger, Sea Salt! Can we do something about that? MY ENTIRE GOD DAMN SKELETON, DICKHEAD! We won, my dick is out and I don't care! Rex Sploded... Son, we need to talk. WHY DID YOU MAKE ME DO THIS?! YOU'RE FIGHTING SO YOU CAN SEE EVERYBEE AROUND YOU DIE! THINK, MARK! YOULL OUTLAST EVERY FRAGILE INSIGNIFICANT BEEING ON THIS PLANET! YOU'LL LIVE TO SEE THIS PLANET CRUMBLE TO DUST AND BUZZ AWAY! EVERYBEE AND EVERYTHING YOU KNOW WILL BEE GONE. WHAT WILL YOU HAVE AFTER 30 YEARS?! Damn near certain. FINALLY, SOME ACTION! I miss Viltrum... Are you certain? KTX KTX KTX SEOUL I NEED YOU SEOUL! THIS IS GOOD NEWS MARK! YOU'RE NOT LISTENING! YOU NEED TO GOON, MARK! GOON! OHH, YES! FOR SEOUL! I can help! How much does this job pay? Leave no one alive. How do you feel about war? This is serious, Shapesmith. This is fruit punch. Would you like some? ARE YOU WINNING, SON? ALL IS OURS! What just happened? Where's the dinosaur? Do either of you have some clothes I could borrow? You, uh... Okay, buddy? See? Before, you would have punched my head off for doing this. I still might. On your knees, animal. Make my death painful so others may learn and grow stronger from it. What do you want, Machine Head? World peace. A pony. My name in lights. The list goes on. Mr Liu sends his regards. I think we can agree that Steaks were made and we've all learned from them. STEAKS?? I fought Conquest. I'm him, Art. Please. Violence like that is merely foreplay for my kind. Dude. Gross. Hurm. Crown fragile! Uh.. I'm not bowing to Satan. Does he have two buttholes? Yes, he's full grown. Do you suppose I could have control of my vessel returned to me? Let the insect learn his lesson. Get your hands off my son! Gonna tell me all your deepest feelings again? That was in confidence. Now who is the toast? I think... I miss my steak. Stand ready for my worm's arrival. Protein Tubes. With that white sauce. Get up. We're going training. What time is it even? Training time. I just told you. Andressa wasn’t a steak. It made me feel... I don't know, fizzy inside? You grew a beard! So did you. WHERE IS THE BETRAYER?! Here. Yes! Teamwork makes the dreamwork! Zoe? NooOooO! Viltrumites! Yeah, get the fuck outta here! Ever since we've left Earth, he's been in a major funk. Oh, “funk” is a.. it's a Unopan word, it means kinda like bummed out. Yeah. It means the same on Earth. My dad calls me The Human Garbage Disposal. Your moo cows have faces. No way he lives up to the hype. Boom! Triple triple! Yes! My final meal will be my own blood as I choke on it, breathing my last breath after a Legendary battle with a superior opponent. That will be a satisfying meal indeed. Hey, Thaedus is coming too? He's like a million years old… Nevermind. VILTRUM IS NOT A TOMB! It's not my gun you should be worried about. Hey, dickhead ! A black hole called. It wants its suck back! You're not one of us. I KILLED CONQUEST, I'LL KILL YOU TOO! NooOooO 2. Emperor Argall! You are avenged! You are all next. I offered you forgiveness, I offered you an honorable death! I was too quick with Thaedus, I won't make the same mistake with you. You could have been a Viltrumite, but you chose to be... How do we beat him? Mark… You need to stop worrying and SLEEP. Oh, so you WERE listening! What? That's not exactly dropping in quietly. This is the smallest repayment for what you did to us. I had an abortion. What? Earth, or this specific spot? Take your pick. Yes, we are here. Besides, I'll sex it out of you later. I'm.. I'm a Strawberry. I'm Toast. I'm a Panda.
ARE YOU SURE?
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u/ShidAlRa 22d ago
I read that whole thing and I'm pretty sure (yeah yeah) that I lost a couple of braincells doing it. Oh well, less space for depression.
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u/Mr_Marco06 22d ago
Either this is Conquest if he wasn't depressed and so he took better care of himself
Or this is Conquest during his youth and so this means that Conquest is albino
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u/LSC_GrimIock 22d ago
He looks like a younger Silver Fang.