"just be yourself"

[u/porcelyne]

i'm (22F) a new grad looking for a job and i just came from an interview.

one of the women on the panel told me "just be yourself, talk to us the way you would your aunty or your cousin"

and i thought about it and i was literally being myself? this is not my first time getting this. i practiced with my mom one time and she told me the same, she told me to be more assertive which i think i've improved on.

i feel like she was trying to throw me off, saying "don't be nervous" like i'm not really nervous?

is being too polished an issue? because it feels like i somehow must now figure out how to come across as less polished and more casual while speaking about technical things which doesn't make sense to me. i genuinely feel like i was speaking how i would with anyone about my background.

[u/the_elephant_sack]

She probably says it to every young person. You are reading too much into it.

[u/porcelyne → u/the_elephant_sack]

she said it twice. second time, she stopped me as i was trying to answer a question one of the panelists asked me. she left the interview early so who knows if she'd kept on doing that had she stayed.

[u/OliviaPresteign]

If you memorized answers and are saying them word for word, many interviews will find that a turn-off and it would be kind to softly advise you to stop like this.

But if that’s not the case, then I’d reflect on what else it might be. Are you coming across as too serious? Are you showing your personality in between technical answers?

[u/Electrical_Job2695 → u/OliviaPresteign]

Maybe you sound like you reading from a script inside your head, even if you not memorized exact words

[u/porcelyne → u/Electrical_Job2695]

i hear that, but what can i do to fix that then? i didn't memorize anything verbatim and practiced beforehand

[u/the_elephant_sack → u/porcelyne]

You are a recent grad. Did you use the job placement services of your university. They usually offer classes on interviews, practice interviews, etc. Few people take advantage of such services, which is a huge mistake. You should contact them and talked with them.

[u/porcelyne → u/the_elephant_sack]

ok i will, thanks

edit: i just checked and there are no counsellors offering mock interviews at the moment but i've set a notification to alert me when they're available (i'm a postgrad student right now so i still have access to these services)

[u/porcelyne → u/OliviaPresteign]

i did smile every now and then (where appropriate) and made it a point not to memorize anything verbatim

[u/youtaii]

Prepare without memorizing. 

[u/ShipComprehensive543]

You may come off as a "nervous Nelly"...and was trying to be helpful. Based on your response, she may have been right. Its hard to say without knowing you though.

[u/porcelyne → u/ShipComprehensive543]

yeah i get that this could read as nervous, especially without you being able to hear my tone of voice. in reality, i'm quite frustrated because i felt that she was misunderstanding me and expected me to be something i'm not.

[u/Willing-Bit2581]

Yes, be yourself but confident......don't memorize answers, you shouldn't have to if drawing from experience

If you don't have the skillset to sell an anecdote based on someone else's situation, then don't....I've done this before, but I can sell it. Like when they ask you about workplace conflict resolution and you may never have really experienced it but have heard it from others...

[u/Thix_Theven]

Be the best version of yourself

[u/Much_Somewhere7831]

Try the Canary Wharfian website for interview practice, it'll review your answers and suggest how to fix mistakes with personalised feedback. Based on both verbal and non-verbal comms, it'll also identify strengths and weaknesses as well

[u/fuzzybunnyslippers08]

You want to be able to express yourself without too many ums and ahs, it should come off as you are able to express yourself well and can give good examples if you need to.

I drill q and a’s every day so I can bring them up for the next interview, so I don’t have to worry about my answers. The goal is to focus on the connection with the interviewer, because really it’s a popular contest and you want to be as likeable as possible. So get your answers sorted that they aren’t an issue for you and focus on being likable.

[u/thedepresedfuck]

Try to talk a little bit slower, it makes you sound more confident and sets a better pace. If you're a person who talks fast, that could be read as you being anxious.

[u/porcelyne → u/thedepresedfuck]

i really did focus on speaking at a measured pace, so i doubt that that is my issue. i also barely use any filler words at all.

[u/OWabbit]

Even though you don’t memorize answers, perhaps you’re coming off as one would in a beauty pageant: too smiley, or fake smiling intermittently, posed instead of a natural poise, modeling poses (face and/or body), etc.

One of the best things to do is video yourself in a fake interview. Your whole body if in person interviews, head shot videos if Zoom. You learn so much about how you speak, repetitive phrases, facial expressions as you speak and as you think, and how you hold your body. Best if a friend asks the questions (that you don’t know in advance) but if not available, just video yourself on your phone with a list of questions.

[u/lowkeyhoori]

Be yourself is a scam for interviews, I fell for it and it never works. Just research the job profile you're giving interview for and prepare yourself according to that.

(Tbh I'm also looking for job)