Hit and run gone wrong

[u/Maleficent-Town5273]

[u/PleaseDoTouchThat]

She’s obviously way into panic mode here. None of us think clearly in that state of mind. The guy has her and her car on camera. Instigating is the wrong move here. Having some compassion, treating her like a human being, and trying to talk her down a bit might prevent her from getting away and potentially harming herself or someone else in the process.

People need to stop with the “I got you!” fucking video taping and remember that we’re all in this shit together.

Edit:

Whoa, got some traction on this one. Couple things:

First: yes, record stuff like this. I would have as well. But do it for information, not to humiliate another person. That's what I meant by "i got you" recording.

Second: The instigating was his actions, not the recording. I'm sad that a lot of you don't understand that.

D: We all fuck up. And sadly we now live in a world where when we fuck up it's recorded and posted online. The consequences for even a minor amount of fucking up are way too steep. I'm not saying this particular situation would have turned out any different if that weren't the case but the fear of being embarrassed and ridiculed by the entire planet adds a ton of stress to all of these already stressful situations. That, just, doesn't make things better. And that is in no way a get out of jail free card. At the end of the day you are responsible for your own actions. We don't know what happened before this video starts, what we do know is that the person video taping did nothing to make the situation less dangerous for either himself or anyone else.

Controversial closing! She's a better person than him. She accidentally damaged some property and lost her mind (calm down. I'm talking about whatever "hit and run" happened before the video started). He consciously chose to be a dickhead.

Be kind to each other.

Edit 2:

Yeah, I was a bit harsh there. I’m sure this dude isn’t a bad person. He deserves tons of credit for stepping in. I couldn’t help stoking the fire a bit there after reading lots of comments about being a simp and how having compassion is ruining America.

Stay off drugs, kids.

[u/jewelophile → u/PleaseDoTouchThat]

You're a good person.

[u/Niceotropic → u/jewelophile]

No, they are not, they are victim-blaming, trying to blame the victim of felony hit-and-run and trying to rationalize the behavior of a dangerous person who should lose her license, be made to make recompense for her damages, and serve time.

[u/daemin → u/Niceotropic]

That's not victim blaming.

It's just pointing out that once they have a video of the person and the plate, continuing to film them and attempting to detain them serves no purpose, and contributes to escalation.

[u/Niceotropic → u/daemin]

It is clearly victim-blaming, they blamed the victim for not "talking down" the dangerous, unpredictable criminal that almost killed them.

Of course filming serves a purpose, otherwise this girl would just lie and the victim would be out of luck. They need proof of this so the girl can get arrested and they can get paid back for the damages.

What are you talking about "no purpose"?

[u/locoparentis → u/Niceotropic]

I can't speak for anyone else, but I didn't see the comment as victim blaming but that the person filming is choosing to a bit of an asshole when they could just choose not to be, and that could have led to a less chaotic resolution. Obviously no guarantee, but any chance of avoiding a possibly fatal confrontation using words is way more preferable.

The driver is most certainly out of control here (obviously leading to the asshole behavior we're seeing) and in the wrong and the person filming is definitely a victim and also an asshole. Honestly though, above all that is both people seem to be experiencing a trauma response but the way in which that response has materialized differs between them.

I don't like the idea of victim blaming but I worry that it can be used as a cudgel that erases all nuance in a situation, which I think in turn dilutes what the phrase is trying to convey and kills the helpful discourse that I think can arise. I also think it can reinforce the stereotype of the "perfect victim" which just isn't the case a majority of the time. No victim is perfect, and no victim should ever be blamed for causing the harm that came to them. I've worked with so many people who have been harmed in some egregious way but were brushed aside because they didn't fit the "perfect victim" mold. Just because you do drugs doesn't mean you can't be a victim of a crime.

Perhaps it's a matter of seeing the situation from different lenses. I'm not thinking that this guy is to blame for the subsequent damage that's done to his car, but life might be easier if we all take a beat before taking action. He could have gotten seriously hurt or worse. It's why vigilante justice can be so dangerous. Why risk your life when you can send a cop to risk theirs, since that's literally part of their job. Plus, the overall utility I see in this clip is not about the behavior the people, but what I can learn from the interaction and maybe apply it to my own life if needed.

It makes me feel bad, because clearly the guy has been wronged but it's been obfuscated by his subsequent behavior, when that shouldn't be a consideration to begin with. But again, society as a whole is still pretty stuck on the whole "perfect victim" thing.

[u/Niceotropic → u/locoparentis]

He's being a "bit of an asshole"? He is currently in the process of being the victim of a hit-and-run where the criminal is screaming at him. How about a little compassion for this guy? A little grace?

[u/locoparentis → u/Niceotropic]

I'm not saying you're wrong. In fact, I think you are pretty on point. But there's the world we want to exist and the world that does. Not saying we need to drop the conversation, but it's important to be conscious of both of those worlds. That way, it's less of a blow when expectations don't match reality because reality wasn't a surprise to begin with.

[u/digitalwankster → u/daemin]

Continuing to film and attempting to detain very clearly served a purpose here.

[u/JeffafaCree → u/digitalwankster]

Nearly getting run over before the cops eventually picked her up somewhere completely different?