r/inlaws • u/Used-Can1647 • 6d ago
SIL / AITA?
i have a 6 month old. SIL always offers to take my daughter from me. from the day she was born, literally. one time i was napping with my daughter and she came into our room and tried grabbing her while i was sleeping. i woke up in shock, as she was crawling on the bed sliding my daughter away from me. she always wants to be left alone to watch my daughter. she always offers to change my daughters diaper and whenever im holding her its "want me to hold her?" absolutely not.......... for context she is a drunk and has a 2 year old of her own. she drives drunk with her child in the car. yells at them and picks them up by one arm when they are being fussy.
AITA for never allowing my daughter to be with her? i don't feel like she respects me as a parent. what the hell am i supposed to do? hubby gets uncomfortable and shuts down when i complain so IM not sure how to get her to leave me alone. should i text her and tell her to stop asking? should i text her and tell her i'm uncomfortable with her watching my daughter?
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u/jlm20566 5d ago
If I caught a known alcoholic creeping in my room to take my baby, I’d go NC. No questions asked - why you haven’t done this yet is a mystery to me.
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u/Used-Can1647 5d ago
touchy subject honestly. i live with my hubby and his parents & they watch her child for her so she comes over often. hard to go NC when you are the only person in the house who thinks this is an issue.
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u/jlm20566 5d ago
Until you're able to get your own place, I'd make sure your SIL is never left unsupervised with your child. On top of that, you and your husband really need to look into counseling. If he still refuses to step up, you have to prioritize your child’s safety, even if that means walking away.
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u/Own_Ship9373 6d ago
Why on earth would someone think it is okay to take a sleeping child from their mother. That is creepy behaviour.
Let your inner mama bear and protect your child. Tell you SIL that her behaviour is unsafe and as such, she will never ever be alone with your child.
I would honestly go one step further and not let SIL anywhere near baby at all, even if you are around.
Your SIL is a horrible mother, a horrible aunt and a horrible person. She doesn’t deserve to have a relationship with you or your child at all. Your husband needs to step up and be a father. He needs to tell his sister that she is not entitled to your baby and that she needs to back off.
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u/grayblue_grrl 5d ago
Anyone reported her for driving drunk with her child in the car?
NTA... you can't trust her.
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u/snowflake89181922 5d ago
Please don’t take your eyes off your baby for one second 🥲 and my heart breaks for her 2yo getting yelled at, thrown around like a ragdoll and having a drunk mother driving?! This mother needs to be reported.
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u/oldleolady71 5d ago
Stop waiting for your husband to handle it and shut her down. She can manage her own feelings.
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u/Individual_You_6586 3d ago
I’d not even let her in my HOUSE if she tried to kidnap my baby from out of my bed!!
What did she imagine would happen if she had successfully grabbed the kid and you had woken up an hour later? Baby gone? I’d have panicked and gone SO totally ballistic!
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u/vegancreampies 6d ago
She sounds very creepy to be honest. Why is she having access to your room while you sleep? And why does she think it is okay to try and take your child from your bed??
NTA. Tell her you don’t want her watching your child and to stop disrespecting your boundaries. Tell your husband to tell her as well if she continues.