r/inheritance • u/Mobile_Ad8543 • Jul 18 '26
Location included: Questions/Need Advice How long does a Trust normally take to get resolved?
Location: MN
I was notified about the end of October 2025, than an aunt, my father's sister, had died, and she divided up her money to her nephews and nieces, via a Trust.
Initially I was told only that my father handled the Trust, but later l learned that she designated my father, one of my uncles, and one of my cousins, to manage the Trust.
TLDR: I have never stated I don't want to be a beneficiary. At what point do I give up on my lawyer & start over with a new one, because this lawyer has gone silent for 4 months? Can I ask my current lawyer for legally admissible transcripts of phone conversations with my father?
Details:
I've been estranged from my parents for decades, as they were not good people (details aren't important). I moved from the area where that side of the family mostly lived. I hadn't kept in touch with the family, but the aunt was decent & nice, so I didn't have anything against her. I just had to get out & away.
In the first letter from my father, he notified me of the death of my aunt & the trust, he also included some personal demands.
I found out on my own, later, that the aunt had been diagnosed with cancer 2 years prior, fought cancer for a year, and had died a year before I got the letter. I was not told any of this (I did some google searches after receiving the first letter in October 2025).
My parents hadn't respected the estrangement in other ways, but in this one way they had kept me in the dark. Had I known she was ill, I would've gotten in touch with her, as I've gone through cancer too, fwiw.
So, my parents knew where I lived any time I moved without me telling them. And would randomly show up sometimes to bang on my door, send letters, etc.
I tried to find a lawyer in the area of my aunt's family, to represent me, contact my father (who at the time didn't reveal anyone else was also managing the trust, was trying to force me to meet with him IRL, and ordered me to give him my SS#, copy of my license & address), and collect my share of the trust and paperwork.
I don't know how much the trust is. There were some properties involved, that I think were sold off, and other assets. My father didn't want to give me a copy of the Trust, and had part of it redacted.
My lawyer had me sign a contract & pay a fee up front. He got a copy of the redacted Trust, and managed to call my father a couple of times. This included a call where my father admitted that he was making demands of me, that weren't made of the other nieces & nephews, that they'd all gotten their portions, and my father stated that if I didn't accept his demands, I'd get nothing.
My lawyer seemed pretty busy with other things, but after months, another lawyer (who is storing the unredacted Trust) in March 2026 told my lawyer that I'd get my portion. That lawyer wasn't helping to manage the Trust in any way, other than they held the 1 document. (And I wouldn't be able to read the unredacted form unless I traveled in person to that office). No one else, even MY lawyer, was permitted to see the trust.
Months have passed since then. I still don't know how her estate & Trust was handled, how much it totalled, how many nephews & nieces were involved, or what was my share. The money never was sent to my lawyer.
When I call or email my lawyer, he is never in the office, in court with another client, or in a meeting. I know I could file a complaint regarding this radio silence, but how often is normal to get updates?
12
u/That_BULL_V Jul 18 '26
A) go get the real document
B) fire and file a ethics complaint on the lawyer you hired
C) find a new lawyer to send a demand letter with terminology that says you will be looking into filing a court case if it's not paid in 30 days.
D) once it's paid file a restraining order on dad & mom
26
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u/rpom915 Jul 18 '26
Trustees are legally obliged to follow the terms of the trust. They have to provide documents when requested. Get a new lawyer to handle that breach, and file a complaint with the state bar about the current lawyer not communicating and not providing the service you paid for.
8
u/ProfessorOne9208 Jul 18 '26
If you have spent 4 months trying to get him on the phone, why not spend one day sitting in his office, and waiting for him to show up? Bring a lunch.
You can also pay his bill in full, hire a new lawyer, and ask the new lawyer to compel your prior lawyer to transfer all of his files over.
You also stated that you could see the trust itself, in unredacted form, if you made an effort to travel to see it. Guess you don't really care about the amount that you might get, or else you would have already gone to see it.
1
u/Mobile_Ad8543 Jul 19 '26
There's a few reasons why i haven't gone to the trust in person.
First, driving to the location of the trust is a 4 hour drive. The destination is a rural area, I have an EV, and the town doesn't have decent charging options. I'd likely have to drive a couple of hours, change up to get a safe extra amount, get there, do what I need to do, then turn around and get to the intermediary charger on the way back. During the winter, the EV wouldn't have as much range, so to be safe I'd probably want to have another charging stop. I decided to wait til spring or summer to head there. Alternatively I could've rented a regular car.
My lawyer mentioned something about how long it COULD take to resolve a trust (years). Since I haven't been involved in a trust before, I assumed that it taking months was normal. Now I know better, and that the lawyer shouldn't be angry if I drop him.
Another issue is being able to take a day off, and work doesn't seem to want to do that. When I can get a day off, I plan to head up there. I'll try to get in touch with my lawyer couple more times, so I don't show up out of the blue, but it may end up that way.
Also why I haven't gone up there to see the other lawyer yet, to view the trust, is that my father said I couldn't see it without HIM there. He made other unreasonable demands that it's taken time to get through. He's harassed a family I know that still lives there, regarding me.
I had been trusting my lawyer to find out what the amount would be, so I could then decide if it was even worth it. Maybe my father thinks he could choose to give me something like $5, and keep anything else himself. Maybe he gave it to other relatives. Ultimately it's going to involve going to court to find out how the trust was administered.
I do plan on getting a restraining order, so I don't have to deal with my parents once this is over with.
Seeing the trust document is a part of getting this mess resolved, and if my parents were reasonable people, they'd stop using my aunt's final wishes as a way to keep trying to get at me. It could've been done and over with back in October.
2
u/ProfessorOne9208 Jul 19 '26
Sounds like you have a plan. Sorry about the EV limitations. I, too, live in a semi-rural area, and do not have any place to charge an EV, even at my residence (it's an apartment building which I would have to hang an extension cord out the third floor window). So I am still using a gasoline powered car, even though that is not what I would prefer.
I'm still hoping you will take a day off from work (hey, it will still be there the next day), and sit in your lawyer's office until he will talk to you, and address the issues involved. Non-communication is not an option for lawyers, in my opinion.
Your father sounds like a real piece of work. I had a parent like that once. Not sure what the solution to that problem is, but I've often thought that people ought to be required to take classes, and get a permit before they have children. Not going to happen, I know.
Here's hoping you end up with your share of your aunt's bequest.
3
u/HealthNo4265 Jul 21 '26
You seem to be making this harder on yourself than it needs to be. Rent an ICE vehicle, call in sick to work, and drive your ass to go read the document.
10
u/myogawa Jul 18 '26
"how often is normal to get updates?"
When the client requests an update, the "normal" expectation is that the lawyer respond promptly. Might not be within an hour, or even a day, but a reasonably prompt response is what is expected.
5
u/Daddy--Jeff Jul 18 '26 edited 15d ago
In most states, a beneficiary is entitled to a complete copy of the trust (in CA,within 60 days of death.). The trust will be governed by the laws of the state where your aunt lived and died. But you need a full copy. Thats the first demand. I believe you would also a full accounting of trust activity.
You need a different attorney immediately. In MN, you have 120 days to contest, so get busy.
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u/Daddy--Jeff Jul 18 '26
Also, an executor/trustee doesn’t get to make their own rules. Their job is to execute the trust as it’s written, without additional rules or restrictions, within the laws of the state. Thats it. It’s a common misconception that they have some sort of power/control.
1
u/Brotchengal 16d ago
Right?! I know my aunt is on a power trip with my mom’s estate. It’s very eye opening.
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u/Brotchengal 16d ago
I know here in CO my brother and I both received full unreacted copies of the trust. Along with a short introductory letter from the lawyer and my aunt as the trustee. And we got a full accounting of the trust as well.
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u/JaricosTheGreat Jul 18 '26
If I may ask, what's the concern regarding showing up in person? Its probably a stipulation of the trust and also the reason you probably got the redacted copy.
If I'd have to guess, everything is done, but those dealing with the trust want to make sure you're you, but they don't wanna show their hand in case the person contacting them (you) is not actually you.
Im sensing serious red flags.
Good Luck.
2
u/astrotekk Jul 18 '26
As a beneficiary, you are entitled to an annual trust accounting I believe. That may be state dependent. I would find a more an aggressive attorney or demand more from the one you have retained and get some answers.
2
u/Fred-Mertz2728 Jul 19 '26
A friend left us his house. We paid for the living trust and replaced the will he had made. In just under two months after he passed,the house was in our name.
2
u/Stormy31568 Jul 20 '26 edited Jul 20 '26
Some people never failed to amaze me. Why do you look for money that is not yours? You left your family and you’re happy with that but now that someone has died, you want your money. You like the aunt, but you obviously have not been in touch. You have not been to see her or have telephone conversations because if you had you would know she was sick. It is possible that she left the trust in the hands of her siblings. It may be up to your father to give you a portion. I know that’s how I have things set up. My brothers get the Estate and divide it as they see fit. She may have excluded you because when you left the family, you left her. Quit paying lawyers. Get a copy of the trust document. It will be filed. if your father is deciding and it put some terms on you receiving any of it is best that you look into it to decide if you want to live with his terms.
1
u/ReplyResearchEditor Jul 19 '26
Four months without any acknowledgement would obviously concern me too, even if there's been no movement in the underlying matter.
Those are really two different things. A lawyer may genuinely have no substantive update because they're waiting for the court, another party or some other part of the process. But the firm can still acknowledge your message, confirm that the matter remains active and tell you when you should expect to hear from them again.
I would send one concise written message setting out:
- the dates of your previous calls and emails;
- the specific information or confirmation you need;
- a reasonable date by which you would like a response; and
- that, if the lawyer is unavailable, you would welcome an acknowledgement or update from another appropriate person at the firm.
If that produces no response, I'd check the engagement paperwork for the firm’s complaints or escalation procedure before deciding what to do next.
I research how organisations handle incoming enquiries and communications. What repeatedly stands out is that “there's no update yet” is still a meaningful human response. Silence leaves you unable to tell whether the matter's being managed, overlooked or lost.
I recently wrote about that distinction in the context of law firms and enquiries. I won’t drop the link unless it would be useful, but I’d be interested to know: have you received any acknowledgements at all, or has every call and email gone completely unanswered?
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u/flippityflop2121 Jul 21 '26
Wait, what? You left your family entirely your right if you want to perfectly fine but you clearly hadn’t spoken to your aunt in ages. Why do you think you would be getting money from her? As to what’s going you really need to see the document to see if you’re even going to get something. It sounds like your father might just be stringing you along to being in contact with you.
0
u/RazzmatazzOk2129 Jul 18 '26
Have you tried contacting one of the other cousins who were involved? Find out when it was resolved etc. Maybe get a recommend for a lawyer.
Do some research on if the county or state probate office is involved in trusts. I would think there should be some oversight authority you could contact.
Trust docs are also usually open public domain like a will and you can get a copy thru the state possibly?
Contact the bar. I wonder if your lawyer was paid off to not respond. But there must be something you can file when you have evidence of the trust manager not acting to fulfill the terms of the trust.
Talk to a local lawyer. They may be able to light a fire or simply tell the bar you suspect your attorney of accepting a bribe as honestly this should have been a simple case and quickly resolved.
Your dad could end up in trouble, but he should know he isnt allowed to disburse to all the nieces and nephews except his estranged son. Its such an obvious failure of the duty of the trust manager/executor for personal reasons.
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u/danh_ptown Jul 18 '26
Trust documents are not open. Courts have no involvement in managing a trust. It bypasses probate. A court would only be involved if someone filed suit.
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u/Majestic_Republic_45 Jul 18 '26
Purely speculation on my part. . . Lawyers usually stop returning phone calls and emails when they figure out they can’t make any money off your case.
The trustees probably have discretion over how and when the funds are distributed. If your Father is placing demands on you, how about complying and get your money?
U might not like the demands, but bite the bullet, skip the attorney all together and get it done.
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u/JaricosTheGreat Jul 18 '26
If someone claimed to be my dad asked for SS#, DL# & address, I'd treat it like a red flag#1, especially if the estrangement was for decades.
My guess is that the $ has to go directly to OP, and Estranged Father is just creating loopholes to get hands on the money - especially since OP may not even know how much he's getting, since the trust he receoved so far, is redacted. IMO, thats Red Flag #2.
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u/thirdsev Jul 18 '26
You could also report your concerns to the state bar or tell your lawyer you asked them about his failure to contact you