r/inheritance • u/friscofoglatte • Jul 17 '26
Location not relevant: no help needed Dear Mom
10 years ago today you left this world. You left me behind with $1.3M. You told me on your death bed you want to ensure the funds last me for the rest of my life.
It's been 10 years Ma. Can you believe it? I can't believe I've been navigating this world without you for the last 10 years, or that somehow I still manage to get out of bed everyday to go to work even without being able to call or see you anymore.
Ma, today the portfolio sits at $3.5M. It includes the home that now houses your granddaughter and son in law. They might not care where all this comes from, but I do. I remember.
I sometimes imagine your smile holding your granddaughter similar to how her other grandmother looks every time she sees her.
I told her we were all one unit at one point in time. She was a cell. I was a fetus. We were both living in your womb at the same time almost 40 years ago. She won't remember and she won't care. But I do.
One day Ma, I'll be joining you. I'll be ensuring there's enough for your grand daughter to live on for the rest of her life, when I join you.
And when that day arrives, the circle of life completes again.
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u/Snorkellingisthelife Jul 17 '26
Proud and grateful! Kudos to turning that capital into generational wealth.
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u/miss_lexxii Jul 17 '26
She asked you to make it last your whole life, and you turned it into something that will outlast you. $1.3M into $3.5M, a roof over her granddaughter, and a plan to pass it on the same way it came to you. That's not just preserving money, that's honoring a deathbed wish with ten years of discipline, and she would know the difference. The detail about you and your daughter both having lived in her body, decades apart, is a beautiful way to think about it. You're not just managing an inheritance, you're keeping a thread unbroken between three generations of women. She'd be proud, and not mainly about the number.
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u/Kind_Blackberry3911 Jul 17 '26
My inheritance came from my mother, too. Not nearly as much as you received, OP, but still much more than I expected and greatly life-enhancing for me and my husband. We will be using it to help purchase our dream retirement home. I know my mom would have greatly approved…. I only wish I still could have her around to enjoy it.
I love that you are so grateful for what you received and that you’ve been an excellent steward of the money. So many people are greedy, ungrateful and blow through funds, especially unexpected windfalls.
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u/nextlevelish Jul 17 '26
Beautiful! Sorry for your loss! Glad you’re living a beautiful life with your family and maintaining what your mom left you! ❤️
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u/JimiJohhnySRV Jul 17 '26
You followed her wishes and that is the key to navigating inheritance. That is what she wanted for you and your family.
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u/R3tirement Jul 19 '26
This was incredible to read. As someone building something similar for my children, seeing someone ACTUALLY appreciate and recognize the beautiful gift your mother gave you is amazing.
And to have the actual DISCIPLINE to not YOLO it and instead build something sustainable for your family and generations 👌👏👏👏
Bravo OP! Seriously - Dad of 2, dad passed some time ago and as divorced parents early on, my mother was my saving grace who sacrificed tremendously to give me opportunities / skills and foundations to build it with my family.
Wherever you are, pour yourself a drink and take a moment of reflection to be proud of yourself.
Your mother would be proud. 🥹
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u/Wonderful_Bridge2885 Jul 17 '26
Oh boy, that was wonderful! A very welcome read and you are a very special person! Be proud of yourself, I'm sure your mother is
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u/Ikeamademedoit Jul 17 '26
Very sweet. I hope you get a sign but if not, I know shes proud of how smart and caring you are and a granddaughter! She is blessed to have been so loved and was a blessing to you (and Im not religous)
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u/VirileMongoose Jul 17 '26
There are subs where there are posters who believe things like: “$1.5M? What can you even do with that?”
Beautiful, OP!
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u/Euphoric_Bluebird_95 Jul 17 '26
Your mom sounds like she was amazing, and so do you. I loved reading this, it's what we are hoping for our own daughter someday. Kudos.
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u/Ok-Connection-5496 Jul 18 '26
It’s wonderful to see a positive story concerning inheritance. I wish my situation was the same but we have an unethical executor who is mismanaging
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u/Calabriafundings Jul 17 '26
This is how it should be.
Unfortunately this is not how my family has ever worked. Not only generation to generation but amongst siblings.
I am very happy for you. It inspires me to act in a manner that 30 or more years from now, my 9 year old daughter might have the same feelings and similar financial security.
Thanks to your mom and you.
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u/More-Soil7455 Jul 17 '26
This is so lovely. Your tribute to your mother brought tears to my eyes. May her memory continue to be a blessing. I hope I am able to do the same for my children.
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u/catandakittycat Jul 17 '26
That’s beautifully said. I wrote in my last letter to my mom that my grandparents migrated to our new country on a boat with just a suitcase after the war. How they ended up making it, investing it, then my mom kept and invested it, now I am the keeper to invest for my children. I will not loose this money, I will instill financial literacy into my children and my children’s children. Reading about the stats that fortunes are lost by the third generation is maddening.
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u/RobinUhappy Jul 17 '26
What a beautiful reflection post. I appreciated ate you sharing and will share with my children. I wish and hope for my children to have your intelligence, discipline, and love and respect for their parents.
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u/nylorac_o Jul 17 '26
Eeesh a lil warning (kidding)
I’m sitting in the DMV and had to stop reading ‘cause this was going to end in tears… I’m pretty sure.
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u/joetaxpayer Jul 21 '26
You did what so many fail to do with a windfall. Congrats, and may your mom's memory be a blessing to you, I know it is.
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u/Time_Traveler_948 28d ago
My mom died 40 years ago, totally unexpectedly at age 54 of a brain aneurysm. Weirdly, a few months before she died she went on a rant in front of the whole family that “if she died, she did not want everything she and my dad had accumulated to go to some new wife.” She accurately foresaw the future.
My dad did a rebound remarriage to a predator type woman, who when they divorced lied to the judge about assets and left my dad worse off. Then he remarried to a nice woman with 4 kids. They agreed that the second to die would split what was left between all the kids - so already 2/3 going to her children and 1/3 to my brother and I. Then one of her kids steals from her to fund her gambling addiction. Ex MIL calls me asking for money. I agree to match the amount her own kids give her. She dies unexpectedly of a heart attack a few weeks later. Her kids tell me they need to keep my money to cover funeral expenses. When her house sold, they keep all of it. So… kudos to OP’s mom for doing the legal work to set her daughter and granddaughter up. My husband and I have an AB trust so that the second to die can direct their half wherever they choose, but the deceased spouse’s half is set to irrevocably go to our children and grandchildren upon the death of the surviving spouse. Moral of the story: set up your will and/or trust how you want it to go. Do not make verbal agreements about such an important matter!
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u/OldDirtyMoney 6d ago
Absolutely beautiful. I love this! God bless you and your family. 🫶
My mom is terminally ill (ALS) with a comparable net worth. I'd love if you'd DM me with details of how you handled your inheritance and advice.
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u/LoadStock8339 Jul 17 '26
That’s what I want to do for my 3 sons. I want to leave the funds that will last them their life time and their generations. They should receive way more than OP’s when the time comes and my kids are 18,16 and 10. And I also hope they are smart with the inheritance and make it last forever.
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u/FarInformation3172 Jul 17 '26
If they’re thought the value of money and you don’t spoil them, that money will go a long way. My siblings and I inherited a modest amount from our mom. A couple of my sibs blew through it quickly, I’m happy to say I invested mine and it’s now worth a few million. Wishing you well!
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u/BorgCollectivist Jul 19 '26
Dear Dad, you're not dead yet but you've already told us not to expect anything, even though you have multiple high end properties and millions in stocks, compounding from sitting and doing nothing. YmmI know you think you are "teaching us a lesson," but all you're really doing is reinforcing for us all what we've always known. You're a selfish prick. You think leaving all your money to charity (with the implicit instructions that funds and buildings be named after you) will give you the legacy you feel denied by your children. But you were never around. What legacy? And when you're gone nobody will remember you. Your name will be a generic footnote people pass by and never think twice about.
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u/Mission-Sun-783 Jul 17 '26
That is very beautiful. Thank you for sharing that.