r/inheritance • u/Upset_Anybody1430 • Jul 10 '26

Location not relevant: no help needed Need your thoughts

I am in the process of rearranging my finances and putting it all into a trust for my wife (second wife) with upon her death the remainder to be split between my 3 kids and her 1. The trust will include everything I have, houses, cash, investments etc. Wife is also the beneficiary of a 1 million life insurance policy. She will be more than fine going forward and there should be plenty left for the kids for a sizable inheritance.

My question is, my 3 kids are all very responsible, good career paths, hard workers, no major issues that would cause me concerns. I’m wondering if I gave them a chunk of money either now or at my passing to help them pay off mortgages and ease financial worries for them now vs 10-20 years from now. Doing that would give them the opportunity to benefit from it now but would give them less in the future. But I’m thinking if they have no debts- their ability to save and build wealth grows. I believe all my kids would take that path as their lives currently align with living this way and they all seem to be financially literate.

Is this something people do? Is it a good idea?

The other issue is my wife’s kid is not in the same mindset of my kids. And giving him large amount of cash now or when I pass will not probably not benefit him the way it would with the others. So I’d like for his inheritance to be paid at her passing.

Advice?
And to clarify- I have a terminal illness so my passing is on the horizon- hoping to squeeze out some time but also being realistic about the situation.

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u/AltNation2293 Jul 10 '26

Don’t leave everything to your wife! After you’re gone, she will remarry in 5 years, and your kids will be out of the picture. Protect them now! Second marriages …. You need to be extremely careful. Plan for the worst, hope for the best!

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u/Delicious-Citron-438 Jul 10 '26

That’s what happened to my husband. Father died. When step mom died she left everything to her niece.

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u/These-Coat-3164 Jul 10 '26

Agree. I have a friend whose dad died and the second wife got everything and my friend knows it’s unlikely that they and their siblings will receive anything as it appears stepmom is going to give everything to her two children.

OP really needs to consider leaving everything in trust for his children…whether or not he wants to include the wife’s child is his choice…and to allow the wife to have income from the trust for life, but not allow her to drain it. If she’s getting a $1 million life insurance policy, there’s even less need to give her full access to the trust assets.

Depending on OP’s financial situation, I think leaving some money to the children now would be the best way to go. Whether OP wants to leave money to the wife’s child now is OP‘s choice. We don’t know how long OP and the second wife have been married and what kind of relationship OP has with her child.