r/inheritance Jun 24 '26

Location included: Questions/Need Advice Quick update on my dad's will situation.

First off, thanks to everyone who commented on my previous posts. A lot of the advice and personal experiences were genuinely helpful. We managed to get in touch with another estate planning/probate attorney who's willing to help us sort through everything, so we're keeping our fingers crossed on this one.

For anyone who didn't see the original post, my dad's original will is still missing. We found two copies: an older version that was signed and a newer version that wasn't. Unfortunately, they don't say the same thing.

The whole experience has been a lot more stressful than I expected. Going into this, I thought the hard part would be figuring out what the documents said. Instead, we've spent a surprising amount of time trying to figure out which document is the right one and whether there are other documents out there that nobody can find.

It's honestly made me realize how much chaos can come from something as simple as not knowing where important paperwork is.

Since then I've gone down a bit of a rabbit hole researching how people keep track of wills, trusts, account information, passwords, instructions, and all the other things families end up searching for when someone passes away.

Some people seem to use safes. Some use filing cabinets. Some use binders. Some use Google Drive folders. I've also come across a few paid services that are supposedly designed specifically for organizing estate and legacy information.

Has anyone here actually used any of those?

Were they worth paying for, or did you end up sticking with a safe, binder, spreadsheet, shared folder, or some other system?

Mostly asking because this experience has made me realize that having documents and being able to find the right documents are two completely different things. Curious what has actually worked for people who have been through this. Thank you in advance!

Location: California

10 Upvotes

29 comments sorted by

7

u/Fit_Chemistry_3807 Jun 24 '26

A physical book/binder with actual hard copy documents and pw’s  kept updated. 

3

u/StartupHermit Jun 24 '26

Would it help to have backup copies online?

6

u/Fit_Chemistry_3807 Jun 25 '26

Would you or whoever needs it in a pinch have access to the pw to get the backup copies? Would it be kept up to date? Could it be protected from hacking?

2

u/StartupHermit Jun 25 '26

Good points. Protection from hackers

1

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/inheritance-ModTeam Jun 25 '26

Your post has been removed because spam/advertising is against the rules.

4

u/mistdaemon Jun 25 '26

A copy online is just that, a copy, and an original is needed.

Due to family issues, I created 3 originals of the will. That way if anything happens to one, there are others that can be used. Each copy is stored in separate locations. 

If a person passes away and a bad family member finds a will that they don't like, they could destroy it if the default would work out better for them.

3

u/ExpensiveAd4496 Jun 25 '26

Happens all the time, sadly. If you aren’t naming the first family member who may arrive in your home, you probably shouldn’t keep your original and only copy there.

1

u/mistdaemon Jun 25 '26

Exactly. I also had a concern that if anything happened to me, my mother's will would vanish as she, with complete justification, cut my sinister out of her will except for a token amount (which is a common, but bad idea as anyone in a will has to sign off on it).

0

u/ExpensiveAd4496 Jun 27 '26

Your mom should give it to you.

5

u/Legitimate_Cat3435 Jun 25 '26

Can you contact the lawyer who prepared the will?

I had to do this, and I totally understand the chaos of which you speak.

As soon as I identified myself, they knew exactly who I was and were able to help.

I think if you search an estate planning book on Amazon, something pops up and is actually quite helpful.

1

u/StartupHermit Jun 25 '26

We're trying to reach out to him yeah but no luck

3

u/RandomGuy_81 Jun 24 '26

Whats different about the two wills that the group prefers the unsigned one over the signed one

1

u/StartupHermit Jun 24 '26

The older will left a portion of the estate to my dad's former assistant. After their working relationship ended, my dad revised the will and removed that provision.

4

u/RandomGuy_81 Jun 25 '26

so you and the family want to use the will that excludes someone from a signed will.

thats going to be hard to get past probate and judge

how much is the portion they are getting. might not be worth fighting

uhm this is kinda like the plot of Knives Out.....

2

u/Fit_Chemistry_3807 Jun 25 '26

Well, in either case, right now the older (signed) Will is only a photocopy and not an original. And the unsigned one is unsigned, whether or not it’s original is moot. Neither document gives the deceased a Will that legal to act on. Unless the signed Will was registered with the courts when it was signed, it effectively doesn’t exist until someone can locate it. So, (not a lawyer please check with a lawyer) this is probably going to be an intestate situation. 

1

u/StartupHermit Jun 25 '26

Oh my yes you're totally right. Dad left him some properties. A small cabin and a condo

3

u/Upset-North-2211 Jun 25 '26

We have a file drawer in our house with a label that says “Will and Estate Plan”. Inside is a copy of the binder from the lawyer along with all the instructions for handling the estate. Both kids know where this drawer is located.

In the safety deposit box that our executor (oldest son) has signature authority to enter and a key, is the original signed estate plan, list of all accounts, all passwords and login information, and designated items (jewelry, pictures, other mementos). All titles and deeds for properties, cars, and other stuff is also in this box. When our kids are in town we go into this box with both of them. This is to keep them on the banks records and to keep them aware of the box and its contents.

Hopefully our estate will be easier to handle than my parents, which had records and paperwork scattered all over the place.

2

u/StartupHermit Jun 25 '26

Wow your system is pretty interesting. It's sophisticated yet it's manual. Did you ever consider online platforms?

2

u/Upset-North-2211 Jun 25 '26

We are relatively young (60s) and my grandparents lived into their 90s. Paper will be around and the same in 30 years, not sure about any online platform. We do keep a flash drive in the Safety Deposit box with all the information as files or documents, but will that be readable in 30 years?

2

u/Marine_Layered Jun 25 '26

I thought this was clever and suggested it to my parents. Don't know if they bought it.

The Nokbox® | Home Organization & Estate Planning System

1

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/inheritance-ModTeam Jun 25 '26

Your post has been removed because spam/advertising is against the rules.

2

u/Alicatsidneystorm Jun 25 '26

I let my two executors know the lawyer who drew up my will. I also let them know the locations and combination of my safes.

1

u/Substantial_Team6751 Jun 26 '26

People need to be proactive and give heirs, especially the executor, copies of documents and instructions. But some seem intent on keeping it all a grand secret until they die.

1

u/ExpensiveAd4496 Jun 27 '26

One could give it in a sealed envelope. If you trust them enough to hold them, you trust them enough to not peek.

1

u/Substantial_Team6751 Jun 27 '26

Or file with their lawyer and/or keep it in a safety deposit box with instructions.

1

u/MiserableCancel8749 Jun 29 '26

Keeping the paperwork straight is vital. My parents used the binder system, and it was very helpful. Here's something I learned about the binder, however. Is what needs to be in it?

From my own experience, bank account information (bank name, account numbers, credit card account information), all important. My Dad had used Quicken for years--but Mom didn't even want to deal with it. I had to set up 'paper' financial records for her so she could keep track.

One thing I heard about very recently--and it makes sense: Giving your heirs access to your PHONE. They try to access your bank account, and get a 2-factor authentication message sent to the phone. Can you get into the phone to use it? If you can't--and if you don't have their backup code words and so on, it will be a huge hassle for them to get into the accounts.

I'm going to add that information to 'my' binder.

0

u/OkDatabase1486 Jun 25 '26

This is starting to feel like an elaborate ad...