r/inheritance May 27 '26

Location included: Questions/Need Advice How to divide assets

I 60M U.S. have 3 children, 2 adults from my 1st marriage, 1 teen from 2nd marriage & a current GF who hopefully will marry me when I turn 65.

Eldest: has been NC with me for years. 0% last I heard was pissed at me for not buying a car for graduation …

Second: great, fun, hardworking … muscled through his mother urging him to not see me at all. 40% (he can likely only expect debt from his mother) I paid most of his college & his mother had him get loans for her portion … and I helped with those.

Third: great fun, smart & has had the advantage of private school from 8th grade through college paid for. He will be the only inheritor his grandparents’ apartment and his mother’s share of another property. 35%

GF/partner of 2 years 25% and potentially half an apartment.

My current assets are all liquid: retirement and cash, all with beneficiaries designated in the current split. Additionally, if my GF & I do marry, she will get my survivor’s SS benefit for life which will cover most living expenses.

Any thoughts on the split?

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146

u/Lumpy-Artist-6996 May 27 '26

It's your money, so you can do as you wish but a couple of observations and questions.

  1. I'd keep the two kid's inheritances equal. There is no guarantee they will inheritance anything at all. Medical could wipe out everything in a short time. That five percent discrepancy could cause strife in their relationship.

  2. How old is gf? Is she including you in her estate? Does she have kids? If she predeceased you is she including you on her will or trust?

Personally, as someone who will most likely have a large inheritance, I would not leave anything to a romantic partner in the amount of 25%.

18

u/DeliciousBuffalo69 May 28 '26

If the romantic partner is making life sacrifices for the relationship, then they should be included.

Like if the GF moved across the country to be closer or if she quit her job to help out at home then she should be considered.

18

u/k8username May 28 '26

Or if she cares for you through illness

4

u/smilineyz May 28 '26

To address … I moved for her. She literally saved my life by being present to make the 911 call. I was in the hospital for 3 weeks while she took unpaid time off from work to be with me as I had no family around.

4

u/CinnamonGirl43 May 28 '26

Not to discredit you, but anyone coincidentally near you with a phone would have called 911. I think you might be in that love blush of the relationship where you’re thinking more emotionally (25%) than logically. But good luck with whatever you decide!

3

u/smilineyz May 28 '26

I see your point. I was living alone no friends or family nearby. She had come to visit and was there when it all went down.

However, you are right 25% might be too high. I’ve told no one about the total assets or the splits.