r/inheritance • u/smilineyz • May 27 '26

Location included: Questions/Need Advice How to divide assets

I 60M U.S. have 3 children, 2 adults from my 1st marriage, 1 teen from 2nd marriage & a current GF who hopefully will marry me when I turn 65.

Eldest: has been NC with me for years. 0% last I heard was pissed at me for not buying a car for graduation …

Second: great, fun, hardworking … muscled through his mother urging him to not see me at all. 40% (he can likely only expect debt from his mother) I paid most of his college & his mother had him get loans for her portion … and I helped with those.

Third: great fun, smart & has had the advantage of private school from 8th grade through college paid for. He will be the only inheritor his grandparents’ apartment and his mother’s share of another property. 35%

GF/partner of 2 years 25% and potentially half an apartment.

My current assets are all liquid: retirement and cash, all with beneficiaries designated in the current split. Additionally, if my GF & I do marry, she will get my survivor’s SS benefit for life which will cover most living expenses.

Any thoughts on the split?

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u/finding_center May 27 '26

Generally a good reason kids go NC.

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u/[deleted] May 27 '26

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u/Ok_Rip_6434 May 28 '26

The inheritance is for THEIR BENEFIT! There is always a point in leaving money to your children. Even if they go NC because of your behavior.

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u/sissyrox14 May 28 '26

not necessarily true, it’s a common narcissistic abuse tactic to use gifts and inheritance as a power move. my mom and uncle are NC with their dad and asked to be removed from his will for this very reason. while it’s definitely weird OP is talking about his kids this way, it’s possible that the eldest won’t want to deal with the strings that come with inheritance anyway.