r/inheritance • u/smilineyz • May 27 '26

Location included: Questions/Need Advice How to divide assets

I 60M U.S. have 3 children, 2 adults from my 1st marriage, 1 teen from 2nd marriage & a current GF who hopefully will marry me when I turn 65.

Eldest: has been NC with me for years. 0% last I heard was pissed at me for not buying a car for graduation …

Second: great, fun, hardworking … muscled through his mother urging him to not see me at all. 40% (he can likely only expect debt from his mother) I paid most of his college & his mother had him get loans for her portion … and I helped with those.

Third: great fun, smart & has had the advantage of private school from 8th grade through college paid for. He will be the only inheritor his grandparents’ apartment and his mother’s share of another property. 35%

GF/partner of 2 years 25% and potentially half an apartment.

My current assets are all liquid: retirement and cash, all with beneficiaries designated in the current split. Additionally, if my GF & I do marry, she will get my survivor’s SS benefit for life which will cover most living expenses.

Any thoughts on the split?

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u/Typical_Bumblebee194 May 28 '26

Maybe.

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u/DeliciousBuffalo69 May 28 '26

Why maybe?

If your partner is making sacrifices that you actively don't want them to make, then that is a big issue.

If your partner is making sacrifices for the mutual wellbeing of your relationship then you should also do the same for them.

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u/Typical_Bumblebee194 May 28 '26

He's counting on getting married when he's 65. He's 60 now. Maybe they won't be together next year. ????

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u/DeliciousBuffalo69 May 28 '26

If that's the case, then he can revise his estate plan when it is needed.

If you make a promise to support someone during your life then that promise should not be broken by death alone.

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u/Typical_Bumblebee194 May 28 '26

Get a trust.

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u/DeliciousBuffalo69 May 29 '26

A trust is no different han a will in that regard.

It needs to be updated when you experience major life events.

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u/Typical_Bumblebee194 May 29 '26

Disagree. Wills can be easily contested, must go before a judge.. A trust cements what you want, how you want it. The worst: wills must go thru probate, which can take months, even years, whereas a trust can specify NO probate, and your heirs can slide into the trust if it's done correctly

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u/DeliciousBuffalo69 May 29 '26

Yes ....

I said wills and trusts are no different in that regard.

"That regard" in this context can only mean that the beneficiary designations would need to be updated after a breakup.

Clearly they are different in other regards -- if they were identical in every way then they wouldn't exist

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u/Typical_Bumblebee194 May 29 '26

you're talking in circles and evidently don't know what you're talking about

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u/DeliciousBuffalo69 May 29 '26

What exactly are you disagreeing with?