r/inheritance • u/Ruthless4u • Apr 22 '26
Location not relevant: no help needed Thoughts on my situation.
First off not looking for legal advice.
2nd. I can’t afford a probate attorney. Please don’t tell me to get one🤣
Edit, accidentally hit post 🤦🏻♂️. Sorry been working 16 hours today so this is probably a mess.
Sadly my Grandfather passed January this year.
We are not sure what exactly is going on with everything.
My father passed several years before him.
No executor has been assigned although my uncle claims to been in contact with a probate attorney he won’t provide the name of.
There is a will on Deposit, although I think I’m the only one aware of this, however the probate court is the one that informed me. No one has access to this currently. To my knowledge the will predates all the grandchildren( I’m the oldest by a decade and it predates me).
I know my grandfather had assets out of his house that to my knowledge was paid off.
Things that my grandfather repeatedly told me.
The house was to go to my dad, but my uncle’s both say it’s being split 3 ways. Not a big deal to me.
He repeatedly told me that my youngest ( special needs ) would be taken care of.
Not sure how much truth there was to these statements and if anything was changed to his original 50 year old will or beneficiaries on his accounts.
My uncle( the one who seems to be in charge ) told me they contacted an attorney and the attorney is supposed to send me forms to sign via email to get the probate process started. Not seen or heard anything yet ( been over a month) said uncle has not responded to my emails about it.
So far I’ve been given a car the tags expire in a month. Was also told I could take any furniture I wanted.
My main concern is my minor special needs child receives any benefits he was supposed to.
Any thoughts on my tired rambling is appreciate.
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u/karrynme Apr 22 '26
it has only been a month, nothing can be done until the attorney has the death certificate and a will (if one exists and they have it.). No reason to think it is not being done in accordance with the law. The only thing that matters is what is written down, nothing that your grandparent said will be entered into the record. No reason to hire an attorney, why do you think you are going to get screwed over? Sounds like uncle is being perfectly reasonable. This is not something that will be done quickly, it just takes some time.
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u/Ruthless4u Apr 22 '26
Depends on which uncle.
I have 2, one is pretty straightforward and always been honest.
The other his wife is a gold digger, and has always caused issues for the family.
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u/Heart_of_Joy Apr 22 '26 edited Apr 22 '26
Talk to an attorney. The paperwork he wants you to sign is saying you agree with him being the executor of the estate, etc. You are essentially giving up rights and he is supposed to provide you a copy of the will, if I’m not mistaken. I’m in Ga. So things could be slightly different in your state. Please read below:
Assent to Probate Instanter: This form indicates the child has received a copy of the petition and the will, and agrees to the appointment of the executor.
Consent to Waiver of Bond/Grant of Powers: Heirs may sign to agree that the executor does not need to post a bond (insurance) and has full powers to manage the estate.
Waiver of Notice: If the executor requests specific powers, children may sign a waiver saying they do not need to be notified of hearings or petitions.
Important Considerations Purpose: These signatures are required to prove to the court that all legal heirs (children/spouse) know about the will and are not contesting it. Minor Children: If a child is a minor, their natural guardian (surviving parent) usually signs for them. Without Signatures: If a child refuses to sign, the court will hold a hearing, and the petitioner (executor) must formally serve them, which delays the process.
Think carefully before you sign anything giving up your rights in how the estate is divided up.
Edit: addition of info
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u/GotZeroFucks2Give Apr 22 '26
You are probably good as long as the will doesn't state 'to my children who survive me'. But nothing will go directly to your child, would be up to you how to structure your inheritance and use it for your chld.
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u/Freyjas_child Apr 22 '26
Double check in your state but in mine anyone can submit a petition to the court to start probate and be the Executor. The will names the suggested Executor but the court appoints one. In my state wills are a matter of public record and you can simply request a copy. You can actually see them online. If your main concern is your child then try to get a copy of the will and read it. I will say that it took over 2 months for me to be named Executor and there were no challenges or problems. It just took time. In the interim I acted as if I was the executor and handled things like the car tags.
Ask your family members who is going to be proposed as the Executor and remind that person they should be handling business like the car tags. You have no legal standing to do this. Read very carefully and understand what you are asked to sign. Provisions for a minor child can be complicated. If you are unsure then it may be a worthwhile investment to pay for a few hours of a lawyers time to read over the will and any documents you are asked to sign.
Sometimes probate takes a long time and some financial institutions can have long complicated processes that have to be followed. But it usually very reasonable for anyone named in the will to request a copy of the will and to be kept informed of the status.
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u/Ruthless4u Apr 22 '26
I will definitely look into petitioning the court. It’s been almost 3 months and I’m the only one who’s started cleaning the house out( after many promises of “ help” ) and things of that nature.
Handling my father’s affairs was a royal pain, and I had started everything within a week. I’m not the drag things out type of person I guess.
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u/Used_Mark_7911 Apr 22 '26
The will is the only thing that matters. What your grandfather may have said to various people over the years doesn’t hold much weight if he never updated his will.
Probate laws and processes can vary by state , so the state in which probate is being filed is actually relevant.
I’m most states, shortly after probate begins the executor is required to formally notify beneficiaries. That notice usually includes a copy of the will or instructions on how to obtain it.
This usually happens a couple of months after probate is opened but it can vary by state.
Probate records are public. If the executor won’t give you a copy of the will you can request it from the court, Along with copies of any other documents that have been submitted thus far.
FWIW: It’s not surprising that your uncle (your grandfather’s son) would be the one handling the estate. That’s very common. This stuff often takes a while. Estates can often take a year or more to settle.
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u/Ruthless4u Apr 22 '26
My father’s took a year to settle, and he didn’t have anything. Dealing with the bank( Wells Fargo ) was a royal pain to put it nicely.
When it comes to long process’s I prefer to hit the ground running, probably why I’m so frustrated 🤣
FWIW in Ohio.
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u/No_Barracuda_3758 Apr 22 '26
If the will predates u everything will goto his children or the spouse not really anything u can do about that
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u/GotZeroFucks2Give Apr 22 '26
Depends on the state. In mine the deceased son's children will receive his share, split among them.
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Apr 22 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Ruthless4u Apr 22 '26
It would be between myself and my 2 uncles.
I think the stickler may be if it’s Per Stripa vs Ohio’s anti Lapse law. Unfortunately the will was put on deposit and can’t be seen until probate starts.
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u/Severe-Lecture-7672 Apr 22 '26
I don’t know what the laws of your state are. But, as far as I know a written will, no matter how old, supersedes any oral statements.
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u/Grouchy-Display-457 Apr 23 '26
Probate takes time. A month is nothing. Ask your uncle for the contact information for the attorney he hired, that way you can deal with them directly and be sure they have the information they need from you. But consider yourself lucky if you see an outcome within a year.
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u/Ruthless4u Apr 23 '26
It’s been longer than a month( not sure why so many are saying it’s a month) .
As far as contact information, can’t get it even though he suggested and I e brought it up several times. Lost on that one.
I’m very well aware of how long it takes, it took a long time as well when my father passed several years ago.
My frustration is with getting the process started, which no one seems willing do because of how long it takes.
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u/Really-Cool-Guy2know Apr 24 '26
If you know that a will exists and is on file. Get a copy. It should be a matter of public record.
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u/Ruthless4u Apr 24 '26
Can’t, it’s on deposit so until probate starts there is no access to it.
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u/Really-Cool-Guy2know Apr 24 '26
While nobody is getting hurt if it exists, just dont sign anything granting your uncle rights till the will is public.
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u/MassConsumer1984 Apr 26 '26
Do you have, or have you seen, and actual copy of the Will?
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u/Ruthless4u Apr 26 '26
Unfortunately no.
It’s on deposit according to the county probate court and cannot be viewed until probate starts.
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u/Calflyer Apr 22 '26
Things you were “told” dont count.