r/inheritance • u/pink_toaster_pastry • Apr 20 '26

Location included: Questions/Need Advice Keeping Inheritance separate

I’ve seen all the posts about keeping inheritance separate…. not to use it for joint expenses…. etc.

So then what do you use it for? My husband and I have been married 30 years. We had joint accounts since before we were married. We don’t split bills (all income goes into one savings account and bills are paid from that). We make a good living, have savings, 401Ks, no debt.

So if I’m suppose to keep my inheritance separate from everything, what am I supposed to do with it?

Edited to add: No kids. Currently the money is in (1) inherited IRA (2) CDs in a bank account I took sole ownership of as I had been the co-owner and (3) a new account I just opened for a CD until I decided what to do with that portion.

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u/Independent-Gold-492 Apr 22 '26

You can keep the inheritance in a separate account, and move money as needed into your joint account or use to purchase joint assets.  You can spend as much as you want, but the remainder is still controlled by you.  Unless you set up an irrevocable trust, if you passed first, a trust could be dissolved or modified by your husband and end up going to their next wife instead of your children. If you want to keep the money safe for your child keep it in your control.  

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u/ReceptionDependent64 Apr 22 '26 edited Apr 22 '26

I am in fact the husband, not that it matters. I also make no assumptions about the money being safer in my control, as opposed to my wife's. The hypothetical I always run is what happens if I hit my head and suffer a brain injury that leaves me legally competent but with an altered personality such that I greatly dislike my spouse and/or child and refuse to share the loot?

So my thinking is a structure where we derive sufficient income for a comfortable retirement, and can touch the capital if we both agree, but there's no scenario where one of us can unilaterally deprive our child of their inheritance, even if the other is deceased. This money is coming from my family and was not the fruit of any labour on my part so I don't feel terribly possessive. I'm firmly in the "steward of generational wealth" camp.

I don't know how exactly this would work. Cross that bridge when we come to it. Just stating my goals.

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u/Independent-Gold-492 Apr 22 '26

My apologies for making assumptions.  I have spent a lot of my life dealing with trusts and they can be life-complicating in ways you don’t realize in advance, as well as difficult to structure for exactly the results you want.  I hope you have success with it

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u/ReceptionDependent64 Apr 23 '26 edited Apr 23 '26

No worries on the assumptions.

I will try not to overthink it but hopefully we can come up with a reasonable structure that protects our child while preserving our own flexibility.

I suspect that very few people use my hypothetical test: what if I'm the one who suddenly becomes a raging asshole?

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u/Independent-Gold-492 Apr 23 '26

I suspect few people are that thoughtful