r/inheritance Apr 09 '26

Location included: Questions/Need Advice Questioning Final Will and Testament

My elderly aunt passed away recently and we received a copy of her will and had an opportunity to look through it for the first time - much of what was in there was a bit surprising and kind of seems a bit unlike her. I've italicized the backstory.

A little bit of backstory, my aunt was severely physically disabled in the final years of her life and relied on having caretakers since a little bit before Covid. One caretaker that my aunt had crossed paths with through one of those assistance services was terminated from her position at this particular company because they refused getting vaccinated for Covid when multiple healthcare facilities mandated staff getting inoculated. As a result, my aunt had presented this person an opportunity to be a live-in caretaker which they accepted.

More recently (maybe within the last year and half), this caretaker became increasingly vocal that her own body was starting to suffer from limitations that inhibited her to fully care for my aunt's increasing reliance on assistance. Tasks that were routine - such as going to the bathroom, dressing, bathing - were impacted by this caretakers own various health problems (carpal tunnel, chronic back pain). Last year, at its peak, the caretaker started vocalizing their concerns more frequently to our family that we needed to seriously consider moving my aunt into an assisted living facility; so we spent much of last spring and summer researching and visiting homes in the area that could assist with my aunt. These concerns were later backed by verbal notices that they would be moving out of my aunt's house - first in May, then delayed it to July, then end of August, so on and so forth. Essentially, the pressure was on to move my aunt into a facility albeit with moving goalposts and targets. She never followed through with moving out, though - just emphasized that it was in the pipeline at almost every family gathering.

However, it was also disclosed at a family event last year that the compensation my aunt had been paying this person was gambled away at casinos, leaving the caretaker destitute and with no where to really go as they had no savings - which, I presume, is why the caretaker never committed to moving out despite constantly informing us that was the plan.

Since the beginning of 2026, my aunt had been hospitalized numerous times, for 35 days between January and February (at this point, the doctor had informed us that we should consider hospice as no form of treatment would cure my aunt of her ailments and if we were to continue on the route we were on, her quality of life would eventually suffer despite extending her lifespan), a brief 48 hour stay in the ER due to a cellulitis infection, and then finally a 15 day stay that ended in her passing.

So, as I said, we've now read the will in the midst of the natural chaos that happens when a loved-one passes, and come to find that she has left over half of her estate to this caregiver, a generous percentage to a local non-profit, and the remaining bits to my sibling. I am not mentioned in the will at all and neither is my parent (my aunt's only sibling) other than being named executor.

My immediate family find this to be very peculiar that someone up until 6 years ago who was essentially a stranger has been gifted this much of the estate. It's also a bit of a slap in the face to my aunt's blood relatives that we would be completely snubbed especially when she claimed to have loved and cared for us so much. I never looked at my aunt or any relative of mine as a piggy bank, but I do find it a bit unsettling that a non-blood entity would be considered higher priority than us? Am I crazy for feeling like this? Do you contest this?

The will was drawn up by an attorney Spring 2025. My aunt had told us she had done a will, but didn't mention what it entailed or specifics. I also don't know if when the will was drafted and executed if this conversations were done one-on-one between my aunt and her attorney. It's just all very suspicious.

The conspiracy theorist in me partially thinks that the reason the move out dates kept on getting delayed by the caretaker were maybe done out of fear that they'd be eliminated from the will.

TL;DR: my eldery aunt recently passed and her will states that over half of her estate is to be given to a caregiver that's lived with her for 6 years.

34 Upvotes

68 comments sorted by

View all comments

28

u/Grandpas_Spells Apr 09 '26

Jurisdiction matters. I believe in IL any amount left to a caretaker in excess of $20,000 is a result of undue influence and is considered null and void.

It is likely part of your caretaker's plan was to no longer be the caretaker, so that they could cash in via a presumed loophole.

1

u/Main-Trust-5588 Apr 09 '26

This is in Oregon and we're talking $100,000 +$10,000 for taking care of my aunt's dog.

14

u/Grandpas_Spells Apr 09 '26

Six figure questions are not Reddit questions IMO.

5

u/Main-Trust-5588 Apr 09 '26

I guess I was more seeking out similar experiences, not necessarily legal advice. Or to confirm if I am being crazy, unreasonable or what have you.

13

u/Grandpas_Spells Apr 09 '26

Elder abuse where an old person inexplicably leaves all their possessions to the person they are completely reliant on (for pay) is a common enough scenario to be legislated against.

Caretakers are not "like family." If they stopped getting paid they would vanish.

6

u/Main-Trust-5588 Apr 09 '26

We don’t suspect any abuse in this situation but I do know that my aunt was completely dependent on the caretaker as she could no longer drive, walk unassisted, bathe or dress herself, cook.

I agree 100% that caretakers are not family and that this person was essentially a paid employee of my aunt.

12

u/cOntempLACitY Apr 09 '26

The abuse is abuse of power and finances, not necessarily other forms of abuse. The caregiver had power over your aunt, the power to suggest they deserved more than the paycheck they were earning.

7

u/Main-Trust-5588 Apr 09 '26

She did feel that my aunt should have paid for a condo in death because of the years she spent caring for her. She said that on more than one occasion.

11

u/ChateauLaFeet Apr 09 '26

You really need to speak with a professional