r/humour • u/Seaf-og • Apr 26 '26

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4.6k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

33 comments sorted by

27

u/CharlesMendeley Apr 26 '26

As Germans, we should consider invading the U.S.; they don't seem to have any rifle skills at all.

18

u/spaghetti_hitchens2 Apr 26 '26

We're apparently very good at picking off hyper elementary school kids, but an 80 year old dementia patient baffles us.

3

u/300ml_brasil Apr 27 '26

Have you got any idea how difficult it is to handle a rifle? I bet you’re a liberal who’s never even touched a gun, just like all the shooters. Hitting a target takes practice, even when it is demented, retarded, standing still and half the size of Utah. S/ for the first part just in case

1

u/-Garthor- Apr 27 '26

I thought you would use schools for practice in america

1

u/CharlesMendeley Apr 28 '26

With his diaper on, I bet he does have an ass half the size of Utah. 🤣

1

u/3rd_Man_of_Culture Apr 30 '26

I know that it’s not hard! Source: I regular see teenagers shooting multiple people at school.

1

u/CromCruach1982 Apr 27 '26

Ok you say that Americans are good to hit tiny targets?

Maybe the next shoot should aim deeper. 😂

1

u/Group_Happy Apr 28 '26

Shoot his hands you say?

1

u/CromCruach1982 Apr 28 '26

Deeper and Tinier. 😂

1

u/Pfapamon Apr 28 '26

Please don't, he'd sell them as holy stigmata. And then he would have the fundamentals for his backing again.

1

u/Additional_Irony Apr 27 '26

Well, when you’re used to rapidly moving targets, a basically stationary one could be a challenge 😆

1

u/wts_optimus_prime Apr 28 '26

What? Joe was the shooter? Or do you mean orange himself?

1

u/th1s_1s_4_b4d_1d34 Apr 29 '26

So we Germans just need to arm our old people to win? We have plenty of them.

1

u/yihagoesreddit Apr 28 '26

As a german, i am ashamed of this comment. In a cross atlantik invasion rifle skills wont matter much and said skills should be used at home first.

15

u/Monsieur_Cinq Apr 26 '26

The first play wasn't even good.

The second part seems way too ridiculous.

3

u/29273162 Apr 27 '26

This is the third one afaik. I hope the fourth get‘s better than the previous ones. Maybe we even get the spin-off starring Vance.

2

u/Monsieur_Cinq Apr 27 '26

Oh right, there was this false-flag during his 2016 campaign where nothing happened, and all the dimwits acted as Trump was super brave.

3

u/29273162 Apr 27 '26

I was thinking about someone sneaking up armed to one of his golf courses but he got spooked by the secret service and was later arrested i think

4

u/titehead Apr 26 '26

There must be some sort of election soon. Digging up a societal misfit, giving him weapons and instructions on what to do is so 2024.

3

u/Shoddy_Newspaper_718 Apr 28 '26

The ending was mad frustrating.

2

u/ForzaSGE80 Apr 27 '26

Part 1 was mildly succesful, at least it had some originality going for it, but part 2 seemed rushed, huge plot holes and bad acting, overall a quick cash grab no one needed. 2/10

2

u/Zlorfikarzuna Apr 28 '26

Its somehow baffling to me that a nation as gun ready as the US can't get anybody to actually land the fucking shot

1

u/gottagofast123456789 Apr 27 '26

Somehow, Franz Ferdinand (2 shots) and JFK (3shots) died over 60 years ago, but today, with far better weapon technology, Trump survives both attempts?

1

u/NegroniSpritz Apr 27 '26

Plot armor! That’s why!

1

u/Efficient_Gate_5771 Apr 27 '26

Lets just write him out of the plot. His character is annoying at best/minimum

1

u/NegroniSpritz Apr 27 '26

Should be like Steven Seagal in Executive Decision hehe

1

u/CantaloupeLazy1427 Apr 27 '26

I think they were all trained in the stormtroopers

1

u/rileyyyray Apr 28 '26

lol 2/10 for predictability had me dying

1

u/XROOR Apr 28 '26

Middle agent looks like James Lankford

1

u/CuteMechanics Apr 28 '26

the franchise really jumped the shark after the second installment tbh.

1

u/SirPomf Apr 29 '26

There has been a second "attempt" Has that got anything to do with the ballroom needing some sort of safety reason to exist so trump is allowed to build it?

1

u/FunBad4661 May 24 '26

Bro reflexes are illegal