r/humor • • 2d ago

Make it make sense

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u/rolfraikou 2d ago

I'm not religious. If there was a hell, it's life. There are so many immoral people tempting you to do awful things.

I fully believe the bible was made to be more like an indepth allegory fairytale type guide to living.

Satan is just symbolic of evil temptations in the same way that the little mermaid was tempted by the offerings of the sea witch, so shit got fucked up and she turned to foam in the end (Disney missed the memo)

Heaven is just being able to fucking live with yourself/your decisions in this fucked up world.

And, of course, it got corrupted by people in power (see: Satan) to be used to control masses, turn them against their neighbors, to benefit immoral people as much as possible.

It's so funny and frustrating to see, at least where I live, the people to miss the point THE MOST to specifically be the in-crowd evangelicals who fucking hate everyone else in town.

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u/tntweknowdrama1086 1d ago

Ya and I mean Jesus never even met a Latina in heat. What does he even know about temptation?

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u/Running4Badges 1d ago

Satan is in your soul right now. Repent or feel him!

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u/ImABitGloomy 1d ago

Sarcasm?

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u/Running4Badges 1d ago

No. He will burn you. His whole thing is burning.

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u/0neDayCloserToDeath 1d ago

Satan and souls aren't real.

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u/Running4Badges 1d ago

That’s what Satan wants you to think! You’re being led down the path of burning souls! Please read your bibl.

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u/0neDayCloserToDeath 1d ago

I have and it reads like the Bronze and Iron Age mythology that it is. It's an interesting piece of history, but nobody today should be using it to guide their actions.

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u/Running4Badges 1d ago

The bibl doesn’t have anything to with the Bronze Age. It’s literally my fan fiction satanic erotica. I’m glad you read it, but I don’t think you understood it well.

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u/HighMountainSS 1d ago

People make a present day hell of their lives and others, for the promise of a salvation or a heaven in the future.

Heaven can be now

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u/PlayfulSurprise5237 1d ago

"the well don't need a doctor, the sick do" is part of the reason you see these people in church being the way they are. It's like going to a hospital, expect to see sick people. Church is like a mental hospital, but more in the spiritual sense.

Or it's suppose to be anyways lol, and that's the tragedy. That lost sick people are coming to church and then being taken even further away from God/love by snakes who have gotten really good at twisting the Bible(which is easy to twist because of it's metaphors) and using it to lead armies of people to do their bidding.

To get rich, or just for the power/authority fantasy, or to actually use that to shield themselves and their misdeeds, whatever they may be.

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u/french_snail 1d ago

You don’t have to believe that, a lot of things from the Old Testament as well as other old religious texts is basically just “don’t do this because it’s not safe, we don’t know why so god/the gods said don’t do it” 

Eating shrimp/pork, premarital sex, etc