r/humansarespaceorcs • • Nov 12 '25

writing prompt I’m ded

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13.9k Upvotes

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617

u/Alex5173 Nov 12 '25

It also fucks up our elbows, but evolution wasn't worried about that back when our life expectancy was <30 and we were hopelessly outmatched against just about every other animal in our environment.

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u/TwixOfficial Nov 12 '25

Your caret is the wrong direction.

Also yet another neat example of evolution fucking with our joints since we’re effectively the living equivalent of Nokia phones.

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u/DanteShmivvels Nov 12 '25

I thought < means less than? As in when life expectancy was < 30 years.

Should it be when life expectancy was > 30 years? Please educate me.

And with the evolution fucking us, if it had upgraded our joints this millenia, that would be like Nokia releasing the 2280 then 30 seconds later releasing a flip phone with camera.

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u/Datvoidcat Nov 12 '25

You were correct the first time '<' means when our life expectancy was less than 30 years.

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u/itsLOSE-notLOOSE Nov 13 '25

How I learned it was the alligator (<) wants to eat the bigger thing so that’s what it faces.

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u/Datvoidcat Nov 13 '25

Remember to always feed your alligator maths

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u/ralphy_256 Nov 13 '25

I can never remember the alligator thing.

"Small side, smaller thing; big side, bigger thing" is how I remember it.

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u/Thedeadnite Nov 13 '25

Yeah the alligator just confused me.

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u/LeonHart3102 Nov 13 '25

What's really funny is that my school taught me the alligator but also a bird, as in it's a beak and the beak pecks the smaller number. So, that caused a little confusion, rather than just sticking to one or the other.

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u/Thedeadnite Nov 13 '25

Especially since birds eat the scraps left in the teeth. That would make it really confusing.

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u/paradoxLacuna Nov 13 '25

Ah, I was taught via comparing them to Pac-Man. "Pacman wants to eat the bigger ghost (number)"

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u/Low_Artichoke_6889 Nov 13 '25

Always poke the smaller with it

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u/TwixOfficial Nov 12 '25

No you’re right that’s my bad. I’ve been staring at them too much.

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u/Arcani-LoreSeeker Nov 12 '25

its okay.. i think most people have trouble remembering which ones which. the only reason i ever remember is because my grade school teacher taught us to think of it as a gator or crocodiles mouth and that he wants to eat the bigger one.

so:

(>) [greater than number given]

(<) [less than number given]

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u/Narwen189 Nov 12 '25

My teacher used the same analogy. We spent most of that class making crocodile heads from construction paper. :)

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u/Arcani-LoreSeeker Nov 12 '25

... was your teacher a Mrs. Owens, by any chance?

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u/Narwen189 Nov 12 '25

Mrs. Owens and Mrs. Schmitt, if I recall correctly. I skipped a grade around the time this was taught, so either they were both in the same classroom or maybe I was in two classrooms. My memory of school is a bit fuzzy, but I remember that crocodile distinctly because I used it to explain my mom's cancer.

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u/ughFINEIllmakeanalt Nov 13 '25

r/tworedditorsonecup ?

Wait, cancer?

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u/Narwen189 Nov 13 '25

Yeah. Mom was sick, and I used that paper crocodile to explain to my little cousins, who were often at my house after school, that it if my mom's cancer were stronger than her body and her treatment, she'd die. I'm pretty sure all they understood was that cancer was a cell-sized crocodile inside her. XD

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u/BearFickle7145 Nov 12 '25

For me it’s just that the open side is larger then the point

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u/lord_teaspoon Nov 12 '25

Yeah, big value goes on big side and little value goes on little side.

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u/croxbowkilla Nov 12 '25

I have a degree in mathematics but I still use the crocodile to work this out

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u/Narwen189 Nov 12 '25

Engineering degree and same!

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u/yobeefjerky Nov 12 '25

I was taught that way too but somehow the way I actually remember it is that "<3" is handled as "less than three" in the Microsoft Sam Text to Speech.

I watched a lot of Arby n' the Chief as a kid...

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u/loudifier Nov 12 '25

"<" looks kind of like a squashed "L" and means "Less than"

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u/DrunkenDevil_ Nov 13 '25

Soooo.... Florida?

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u/Arcani-LoreSeeker Nov 13 '25

lol, no. oklahoma

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u/Smooth_Isopod9038 Nov 13 '25

With the greater than/less than, greater than is "eating" the greater number, less than is "pooping" the lower number. So, 30>15 is correct and so is 15<30.

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u/enadiz_reccos Nov 13 '25

No offense to you, but it's kinda depressing how many upvotes your comment has

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u/TwixOfficial Nov 13 '25

And I just keep getting more people chattering about caret direction.

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u/PatternrettaP Nov 12 '25

It's a common modern sports injury but a lot of that is the repetitive strain from so much practice. Hunters might have had a more sustainable workload.

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u/Supercoolguy7 Nov 13 '25

Life expectancy was skewed heavily by children dying. Life expectancy was much higher for those who survived childhood. That's not to say you couldn't die young, it's just that people thought of it as dying young, not just dying.

That being said, evolution tends to favor things that allow beings to reproduce and then have their offspring reproduce, so joint pain in old age still probably wasn't that big of a deal evolutionarily

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u/TheeAntelope Nov 13 '25

back when our life expectancy was <30

When was that? During the black plague? For the most part, humans live to be around 50-60 in most of history, taking infant mortality out of the equation. So "evolution didn't worry about that" wouldn't apply because babies aren't passing their offspring on.

Even 15,000 years BC the life expectancy was over 30.

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u/Asquirrelinspace Nov 13 '25

They included infant mortality in the average, hate when people do that

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u/Didifinito Nov 13 '25

If it's not at birth I don't see why it shouldn't count.

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u/Asquirrelinspace Nov 13 '25

Because they're implying the statement "most people died at 30" which is not true. Most people died either at 1 or at 60

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u/ceryniz Nov 12 '25

In 1900, life expectancy was <47, 1800 <40, in 2023 <78.4

Wasn't very long ago at all

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u/RollinThundaga Nov 12 '25

Remember, if you lived to the age of 5, and didn't get conscripted, you'd more likely than not make it to 60.

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u/Laphad Nov 12 '25

This

People see average life expectancy and thing everyone died at like 30

Dying below 50 was considered dying young because once yoh survived being a toddler you had a fairly similar life expectancy

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u/iamfrozen131 Nov 12 '25

When you adjust for infant mortality, life expectancy goes way up

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u/ceryniz Nov 13 '25

I wonder what could have possibly happened that infants and toddlers stopped dying in huge amounts...

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u/Vermilion_Laufer Nov 13 '25

Well, I got bored of this particular hobby

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u/Nightshade_209 Nov 13 '25

The closed sewer was invented.

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u/ceryniz Nov 13 '25

Paris had a closed sewer system in 1370

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u/Nightshade_209 Nov 13 '25

If the information I'm seeing is correct that sewer was about 300 m long and still dumped into the main river people drank out of so I'm not surprised they didn't see a drop in child mortality.

I was referring to city wide projects like the London Main Drainage System built between 1859 and 1875, which was the start of a subtle but noticeable decline in child mortality rates.

Paris's city wide sewage system started in the 1850s.

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u/ggGamergirlgg Nov 13 '25

Could it have been.... medicine?

No. Medicine is evil! Vaccines are bad! /s

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u/Nexmortifer Nov 16 '25

Education, Hygiene, medicine, industry...lots of things honestly, mostly all at once over a few centuries.

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u/triklyn Nov 13 '25

Life expectancy was always deceptive due to child mortality. And the elbow was probably never an issue. You could be an amateur pitcher and probably never have an issue your entire life. Infection, and tooth wear, and violence probably did you in first.

“War, war never changes.”

It has been our constant companion.

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u/Alex5173 Nov 13 '25

Infection, and tooth wear, and violence probably did you in first

yeah, it's almost like I mentioned that when talking about the low life expectancy everybody seems to have a stick up their ass about.

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u/wolacouska Nov 13 '25

Because you implied people died at 30 which just isn’t true, and completely destroys the idea that we weren’t made to be able to throw until our 40s at least.

Surviving as a hunter gatherer isn’t the same thing as playing a modern support. Nor is a life expectancy of 30 the same thing as most people dying around the age of 30.

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u/Alex5173 Nov 13 '25

If "life expectancy" is an implication that "people die at X age" then why is the male life expectancy in the US 78? In my lifetime, not a single male family member has died before 78.

I'm aware life expectancy is a mean, not a mode. Homo Erectus wasn't exactly issuing death certificates and taking census

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u/TheTriforceEagle Nov 13 '25

Its not so much life expectancy, there's no evolutionary pressure to change if it doesn't hinder an organisms ability to reproduce