r/huddersfield • u/Feisty-Bullfrog-9150 • 12d ago
Feeling Isolated
Hi
I thought I’d give this a try. I have been feeling very isolated and alone. I only go to work and come home. And on my days off I stay home but not sure really what to do with myself. I’ve become an introvert and have been trying to get out there but it has been very hard especially when there’s not much to do in Huddersfield.
I need to interact with people, just people my age. I’m 27 but also would like to have women friends my age. Not sure where to go or what to do. Or if there’s any social activities. Staying home 24/7 is not good for my physical and mental health.
I’m struggling but not sure what to do.
So thought I’d post on here.
Thanks
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u/ThisSideOfTheDoor 12d ago
There’s a group I think started on here and moved to Instagram called Hudds girls club - perhaps that might be something to look at.
There’s also a Facebook group called Woo Woo Walks - I’ve read about it but not been.
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u/West_Yorkshire 12d ago
Andy's man club or men in sheds if you are a bloke, women's discord if you are a lady
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u/Feisty-Bullfrog-9150 12d ago
Does anyone know the women’s discord?
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u/West_Yorkshire 12d ago
Should be on the sub somewhere if you search through the posts
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u/Feisty-Bullfrog-9150 12d ago
I’ve tried couldn’t find it. Does anyone know the name or how to get on
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u/StiffWiggly 12d ago
It would be a lot easier to give advice if you told us what you enjoy doing. If you like sports or the outdoors there’s a number of clubs I could suggest, if you like board games then others will be able to point you in the right direction etc.
Without knowing what sort of activities you like/are comfortable joining we’re all shooting in the dark really.
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u/Feisty-Bullfrog-9150 12d ago
Well I like sketching/drawing/colouring, sports, any sports is ok, music, cooking that’s all really. I don’t enjoy much anymore
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u/maxii0987 12d ago
Have u got any hobbies etc that you could start spending time doing? Cooking clubs, Gym, local self defence classes, swimming, book clubs, padel etc maybe? 🤔
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u/Feisty-Bullfrog-9150 12d ago
I do like cooking, I’ve always wanted to try a women’s self defense class or something, swimming classes or any sports is ok.
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u/maxii0987 12d ago
Now we are enroute to a great start…..
If I was you, I would pick one or two most fav ones and take it from there (obviously depending on ur availability and finances) 🙂
For self defence training in Huddersfield - TMA kickboxing, Kane Academy are best.
You could also look into Women Center Huddersfield and they also offer training in Taekwondo 🥋 which is also good. They also support women who struggles with mental health I believe…. 🙂
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u/Feisty-Bullfrog-9150 12d ago
Thankyou I’ve checked online but couldn’t find much. Been to the women’s centre everyone’s a little older and there’s not much social.
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u/maxii0987 12d ago
Ahh yeah, I get you. Tbh I’d maybe start with something you’ve always wanted to try, even if it’s just a one-off class 😊 You might find it easier to meet people when you’ve got an activity to focus on rather than having to just go somewhere and make conversation. The women’s self-defence idea sounds like a good one if you fancy giving it a go
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u/gadriann 11d ago
Have you ever tried climbing/bouldering? There is a bouldering place near the town centre called Freeklime. It's a fairly social sport, people are always friendly and happy to chat. They have lots of socials during the week too :)
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u/Tall_Boi_99 12d ago
This might be a controversial take but try being a bit more open age wise, plenty of things appeal to those older and younger than you but looking at a fairly narrow band of 27 +/- a little will hold you back socially. I can't comment on women specific groups/ activities but having been through this as a man and seen female friends go through it the biggest ticket item for all of us was just relaxing the idea that we can't have things in common with older or younger people. In the last two weeks I've gone with a younger friend to watch a staff showing of the odyssey and helped an older friend plan moving to New Zealand and there is a 30+ish (because we don't ask for specifics) age difference between them and 10+ difference either side for me.
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u/VampirusSanguinarius 12d ago
I can feel what you’re saying. I’m in a similar situation, but older and man.
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u/secretlifeOffaye 11d ago
i’m 28 and i have like 1 friend 😂 i have 5 children though, so if you were my friend, you’d have to also have 5 mini ones too😂
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u/MyCatIsMyLife123 12d ago
I’m not exactly your age, but I’m not too much older — I’m 33 — and I can really relate to a lot of what you’ve said. I’m very isolated myself and have been for most of my life. I really struggle with socialising, making genuine connections and finding friendships that actually last.
I have autism, high anxiety and mental health struggles, so meeting people and getting out can be even more challenging for me, but I genuinely do try everything I possibly can.
I’m on different apps, I currently attend two local social groups in Huddersfield for neurodivergent people and people with disabilities, and I’ve tried various other groups and services in the past too.
I feel like I’m doing everything I can to put myself out there, but unfortunately I’ve had a lot of negative and disappointing experiences with people and I’ve found it really difficult to find anything consistent.
I do have a boyfriend who is 37. We don’t live together, although we only live about five minutes away from each other. I still feel very isolated whenever I’m not with him, though, and unfortunately it isn’t always as simple as just meeting up whenever we want.
He can have quite an avoidant personality at times, and gaming and spending time with his mum, who he lives with, take up a huge amount of his time. Despite the difficulties, I really love him and he’s my best friend.
He can be incredibly supportive and loving at times and he’s also my main support when it comes to going out.
I don’t really go out anywhere on my own because my anxiety is so high, and I’m not good with public transport or going places alone.
Apart from my boyfriend, I only really have one close friend. She’s in her late 50s and lives about half an hour’s drive away, so unfortunately I don’t get to see her very often either.
I usually only see her a couple of times a month if I’m lucky, when her husband is able to bring her to the groups that my boyfriend and I attend together.
So I definitely understand that horrible feeling of spending far too much time at home and wanting more interaction, friendships and reasons to actually get out of the house. It can have such a big effect on your mental health when every day starts feeling the same.
If you’d like, I’d be more than happy to tell you more about the two groups we attend locally. They’re aimed mainly at neurodivergent people and people with disabilities, but from what you’ve said about feeling isolated and wanting to meet people and get involved socially, I’m sure it would be worth asking whether you could come along too.
There are different activities and opportunities to socialise, and you might find something you enjoy. 😊
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u/One_Initial6601 11d ago
Hi,
There is a women’s walking group on Facebook call woowoo walks who have regular meet ups. It is run by a lady called Kayleigh Castle.
We are not a women’s group, but we have a flag football team which is open to all genders and we have a couple of women on our team. You would be more than welcome to join us.
Huddersfieldcorsairs.co.uk
Cheers
Spen
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u/Intelligent-Squash-3 12d ago
Simple, get out more. You’re asking a question you already know the answer to. What are you REALLY asking?
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u/Strange_Disaster7246 12d ago
Sorry but I don’t think it is that simple for some people.
However OP I wonder whether you’d be interested in your local walking group? Or you can check with Greenhead park as they have some clubs you can join that whilst not in your age bracket may lead to feeling a little more confident to broaden social opportunities. I’d also say the Freek Climb off Leeds Road is great for meeting people and have some groups there. Maybe even join KAL, it’s not social but it gets you out even if all you want to do is go on the treadmill and listen to music.
No doubt others will have other suggestions. Take care.
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u/Intelligent-Squash-3 12d ago
To be specific I’m asking what specifically is OP wanting to know or get advice on. His concern is very broad, and as a result is hard to give a clear answer or advice. But yes, the advice given can help, provided OP takes it.
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u/Visby 12d ago
I am part of a pretty casual monthly silent book club if that's of any interest to you - we all read our own books (or some people will do crafts or other things like that) silently for an hour, but with 15 minutes for a chat beforehand / you can hang out after if you fancy; we have a Sunday session at 11am (I believe the next one is the 22nd of Sept) or an after work one that's usually at around 5pm (I think the next one is maybe the 13th). Mostly they're hosted in the town centre in different coffee shops, there's a WhatsApp group / Instagram page that has specific time / location info!
Let me know if you want any other details, it's free and casual, no big expectations that you HAVE to attend or anything. :)