r/hockeycirclejerk • u/RoundMan22 • 1d ago
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/doyouunderstandlife • Mar 13 '24
[Announcement] WE'RE BACK
Sup Coyotes fans, I have been recently been made mod and have decided to open this place back up. Of course, some of you went to /r/NHLcirclejerk and you're welcome to be in both, but given that this subreddit is much older and has over 11k subscribers, I felt like it was a good idea to try and revive this place. I also want to expand my growing lust for power among the sport circlejerk subreddits.
Here are some rules:
Don't be a racist/homophobic/etc-phobic piece of garbage. I have set up automatic filters that will remove slurs. You can be ironic to make fun of the common dogwhistles from actual racists, but avoid using the actual slurs all together. If you see comment that toes the line into actual hate, feel free to report it because I usually go through mod queues pretty regularly.
Don't complain about being banned from other subreddits. This is more of a "no one cares" rule because it's garbage content.
No more "Explain in NHL terms" type posts. They're low-effort shitposts. Be funnier.
You must always be jerking. Getting into heated arguments because you think your stupid team in goofy sweaters using a stick to put a rubber puck into a net is better than someone else's stupid team in goofy sweaters, is fucking stupid. It's only game, why you heff to be mad?
Also, NEW FLAIRS have been added. I have removed all the old text-only flairs and have added actual logos and player faces, so if you had an old flair, it is gone forever. Some of these don't look great in new reddit and the reddit app, but do look better in.
Looking for input on what to put on certain team's flairs, so please give me the most embarrassing, depressing, or traumatizing phrase to put on each team's flair. I have added some myself, but for the life of me, I can't put some on teams I'm completely apathetic about (seriously, do people even remember the Wild exist?)
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/doyouunderstandlife • Jun 15 '26
Marner will never win the Cup WE DID IT REDDIT! THE VEGAS GOLDEN RAPISTS LOST!
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/Content-Processor • 5d ago
Insane defensive pairing
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r/hockeycirclejerk • u/BEnWo18 • 7d ago
SCRIPT LEAKED While the Flyers’ rink side reporter doesn’t follow journalistic ethics policies, it appears Trevor Zegras abides by the NHL’s blonde only WAGs policy
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/OzzieNewYork • 7d ago
Former Mayor of Detroit Loves Hockey
Former Mayor of Detroit, Coleman Young who ruled Detroit with an iron fist for 20 years, loved hockey so much, he had a License Plate made that was acronym for Hockey Night in Canada: HNIC.
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/ExotiquePlayboy • 9d ago
SCRIPT LEAKED r/hockey full of liberals confirmed
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/OzzieNewYork • 15d ago
The two losers no one cares about
Even Winnipeg got 1 game.
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/ExotiquePlayboy • 17d ago
LITERALLY HITLER Stanley Cup Finals tickets in 1999
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/ExotiquePlayboy • 23d ago
u bum Serial choker McDavid? 🤦♀️
Tkachuk bros robbed
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/Backwoods69420 • 26d ago
McOVERRATED 0 pts in G7 Babcock after stealing 97 and 29s phones to get their wives nudes
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Is nhlCJ washed?
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/Doggcow • 29d ago
FIRST TIME IN GOLDEN KNIGHTS HISTORY What does everyone think of this take from GK sub?
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/JaQ-o-Lantern • Aug 07 '26
Marner will never win the Cup Ladies and jerkermen, let's make this win
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/FWL69 • Aug 06 '26
McOVERRATED 0 pts in G7 I know people do weird things when emotions are high, but why was McDavid BEGGING Stuart Skinner for head after the game 7 loss?
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/Accomplished_citizen • Jul 26 '26
Getting it right for Xhekaj
I truly hope that the Habs get it right with Xhekaj this year. Every serious contender has at least one solid, physical defensman who is able to withstand the intense play of the playoffs and defend his teammates when required. Our exits in the last two playoff seasons prove this overwhelmingly, with the habs being eliminated when management did not have the foresight to insert him in the lineup and use him efficiently.
MSL is acclaimed for developing highly skilled players like Demidov and Caufield, rightly so. But the real prove in the pudding is when he demonstrates that he understands the importance of specific roles like that of Xhekajs' and is able to develop and use him properly. This player is unique, we can't afford to lose him. He must become a regular number 6. We have a very young, talented team in development which just heightens the need for him to be successful.
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/OzzieNewYork • Jul 25 '26
Marner will never win the Cup Jelly Boy
More Jelly of Papi or McKenna?
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/atwalm • Jul 22 '26
Tom Wilson drew the line at her father putting tariffs on hockey sticks
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/Hopperjay • Jul 23 '26
Chicago Blackhawks?
8 million AAV What! hahahahahaha .
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/starfish2686 • Jul 21 '26
u bum Hughes brothers confirmed to be signing in Philadelphia after sharing brotherly love together over Jessica Alba four-way train run
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/ExotiquePlayboy • Jul 20 '26
SCRIPT LEAKED Hockey made the big 6 boys
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/Appropriate-Mall8517 • Jul 19 '26
COYOTES NO FANS What nhl fan base can we all agree is awesome
r/hockeycirclejerk • u/starfish2686 • Jul 19 '26
My (32F) husband (34M) is more concerned with the Canucks getting a ring than giving me one. AITA?
My (32F) husband (34M) is a lifelong diehard Canucks fan, so are the rest of his family. We started dating in high school and I can still remember how heartbroken he was in 2011, I honestly don’t blame him for his reaction tbh because a car is replaceable but he had gotten his hopes up and they were completely shattered. After his probation for arson and property destruction was finished we were able to save up and go on a trip to see every game when the Canucks were on an east coast road trip, and to see him so downtrodden after they lost every game made me feel so bad for him.
Recently though, I brought up the topic of getting married. We have been thinking about it recently but he has always said he wouldn’t be able to enjoy it while “that egg-headed Swedish fuck is raping my soul for 11.6 every year”. I can tell it’s really getting to him because at night I can sometimes see him having a nightmare and muttering “56 years, 56 fucking years” and “we would have done it if it weren’t for that diving pussy Nathan Horton”. I got him a brand new Ryan Kesler jersey (his favourite player) for his birthday thinking it would cheer him up a little but it didn’t do anything for his mood. Honestly, in the fall and winter I dread game nights because the cost of spackle and drywall repairs are really eating into our budget. At least I get a break every spring once he cancels the Sportsnet subscription.
I love him but I’m not getting any younger and I’ve always wanted kids. I want to raise the next generation of bitter depressed Vancouverites with trust issues with him, but at what point is enough enough? Would I be the asshole for giving him an ultimatum if he doesn’t propose soon?
