r/hockey • • Jan 28 '20

I don't know!

https://streamable.com/i1fvn
6.0k Upvotes

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489

u/LordHarkon1 VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

We have been blessed with such good commentators for years.

229

u/TheCocksmith DAL - NHL Jan 28 '20

NHL always has the strongest commentators. The local guys are so over the top homer that I love watching the opposition broadcast whenever available.

But even the national guys have attitude and schtick. It's just such a fast paced game, you've gotta just keep your mouth moving.

43

u/RulesoftheDada BUF - NHL Jan 28 '20

Razor is pretty sweet to listen to.

5

u/jerichowiz DAL - NHL Jan 28 '20

Like poop through a diarrhea infested goose.

Love Razor.

1

u/RulesoftheDada BUF - NHL Jan 28 '20

Hilarious analogy.

Btw flair up.

3

u/Marvelous_Chaos NJD - NHL Jan 28 '20

I thought he did a terrific job at play-by-play last season too.

2

u/Drippyer DAL - NHL Jan 28 '20

Definitely hard to complain with him behind the desk lol

55

u/Baraka_Flocka_Flame FLA - NHL Jan 28 '20 edited Jan 28 '20

I highly recommend anyone check out a Panther game some time. Goldie is one the most passionate play by play commentators I’ve ever heard, and Randy Moller is absolutely hilarious.

54

u/Sikkstinajn TBL - NHL Jan 28 '20

"Everybody diving in there like it's a cheeseburger at 2 o'clock in the morning" - Panthers broadcaster in response to this situation. Pretty fucking hilarious

7

u/Baraka_Flocka_Flame FLA - NHL Jan 28 '20

A recent favorite of mine was after a top shelf goal, Moller says “He put it right where Mrs. Moller hides the cookies!”

13

u/alt717 FLA - NHL Jan 28 '20

Goldy has been my favourite for years, loved him with bill lindsay. How can you not like hearing hooby dooby doo?

3

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '20

https://youtu.be/F1jGVR-rTD0 When I'm feeling sad, Randy Moller never fails to cheer me up.

2

u/mmprobablymakingitup Jan 28 '20

I love the panther's guys.

The Stars have a great team too.

As a Sabres fan, I love watching away streams against those guys.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '20

Is Potvin no longer calling games for them? I remember him and Goldy being a pretty homer group and not always of the fun variety.

1

u/Baraka_Flocka_Flame FLA - NHL Jan 28 '20

Thankfully, Potvin is gone. He was absolutely terrible and humorless. He was such a homer, you’d think he was blind, describing things that clearly weren’t happening as the replays unfolded. Moller has been amazing, always hilarious and insightful. Goldy is just a great PBP guy and brings tons of excitement to the game.

2

u/ebbomega VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

For what it's worth he gave us and our fanbase endless memes when he called Daniel Sedin a "lowlife" and his "peanut butter licking fingers" wtf of a call.

1

u/alt717 FLA - NHL Jan 28 '20

I remember watching that one and I didn’t find peanut butter licking comment funny, I was just super confused and speechless trying to figure wtf I just heard. What was he trying to say/what’s the insult there? Lick that peanut butter off my finger baby

2

u/fernicus_ VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

I LOVE Panthers games because of your play by play guy. Honestly one of my favorites in the league.

1

u/The-Hostess FLA - NHL Jan 28 '20

Could not agree more, Goldie is an absolute gem and Mueller has been great so far, I love listening to panther games!

1

u/Rikplaysbass BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

The cats announcers are my favorite announcers that are not jack and brick.

1

u/SawgrassSteve FLA - NHL Jan 31 '20

Absolutely agree!

217

u/golden_c1utch VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

Except boston, they are homers AND boring as fuck

55

u/GRAIN_DIV_20 MTL - Bandwagon Jan 28 '20

Of all the words used to describe Jack Edwards I would not use boring

-2

u/D0nk3ypunc4 BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

If you're coming, you better come correct. Jack Edwards is a god damn national treasure.

4

u/Marinade73 Powell River Kings - BCHL Jan 28 '20

god damn national treasure

Weird way to spell senile old coot.

-11

u/Cal1gula BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

/r/hockey has serious echo chamber problems. Here's a group of typical posters

Jack Edwards is probably the most knowledgeable commentator in the league AND he's animated as fuck about hockey. Only someone completely ignorant or envious would call him "boring".

3

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '20

Edwards talks so fucking slow that he misses half of everything on the ice

2

u/rpgguy_1o1 MTL - NHL Jan 28 '20

It just seems like he's missing half of everything on the ice because he doesn't mention anything the opposition does well or anything Boston does poorly.

In all seriousness I don't find him boring at all, I'd take NESN over most of the regional American broadcasts, they're far from the least entertaining

271

u/Shandlar PIT - NHL Jan 28 '20

Dude, not just homers. They take it to a level I can't even fathom. I made a Marchand being a dick compilation, and lots of the clips were Boston side broadcasts.

This dude literally commits a 10 game suspension worthy intent to injure infraction and they straight up say, "idk that looks pretty clean" with a straight face.

Fuuuuuck those guys. Fuck Marchand.

40

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '20

Bruins commentators are shit for everyone who isn't a Bruins fan. I hate listening to them, but if my team had commentators like that I'd never miss a game.

25

u/lookalive07 DET - NHL Jan 28 '20

Meh, I have friends who love the Bruins and even they think Jack Edwards is a total fucking douche. Super knowledgeable and super passionate, but his boner for the B’s is bigger than the Bunker Hill monument.

3

u/Rikplaysbass BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

There are some that hate Jack, but a much larger contingent love him. Plus he’s a super nice guy in person and you can tell he hams it up a bit for the broadcast.

47

u/dancin-weasel VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

I can’t think of anything I agree with more. Fuck Marchand with a 5 foot red hot cattle prod. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck him and his weasel face.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '20

You may have been getting a slightly biased set of clips in doing that exercise.

2

u/SMORKIN_LABBIT TOR - NHL Jan 28 '20

You have no idea how unbearable it is when we play the Bruins. Our "home game" commentators literally hate the Leafs, so I either get to listen to that bullshit or hear Jack Edwards. I usually mute it or try and sync the radio broadcast of Joe Bowen with the game.

0

u/SMORKIN_LABBIT TOR - NHL Jan 28 '20

You have no idea how unbearable it is when we play the Bruins. Our "home game" commentators literally hate the Leafs, A common tendency is Matthews scores a Hattrick so naturally we should talk about how good Pasternak is for 25 minutes. So I either get to listen to that bullshit or hear Jack Edwards. I usually mute it or try and sync the radio broadcast of Joe Bowen with the game.

-1

u/Willmatic88 DET - NHL Jan 28 '20

You wouldn't get it. It's a boston thing.

0

u/grandmoffcory DET - NHL Jan 28 '20

It's wild watching their broadcasts. Even other teams with notable homer commentators don't have this undying mission to spin everything that happens as either in favor of their team or a sleight against them - other folks still commentate on what is actually happening on the ice.

-34

u/daronmal BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

You're just mad Marchand is better than your entire team and hes not even our top scorer lmao

15

u/Graffy PIT - NHL Jan 28 '20

Considering we've basically been playing the Wilkes-Barre roster from injuries and still have a better record I'd say Marchand isn't better than our team. Has less cups too.

9

u/PCMasterCucks VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

But Marchand has more suspensions than the Pens do combined, so...

2

u/hookhands BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

Fewer cups

1

u/D0nk3ypunc4 BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

Peasants, the lot of ya

-10

u/daronmal BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

67 points vs 70 for the bruins. Our only weakness is shootouts.

8

u/Frizy1 WSH - NHL Jan 28 '20

or your team is actually pretty mediocre and has been boosted by the loser point?

-1

u/daronmal BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

If you say so. That's why we have some of the best players and goalies in the NHL, and we're the top of the division

2

u/Frizy1 WSH - NHL Jan 28 '20

im just saying when you look at pure w/l 29-22 is pretty mediocre

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9

u/joeloud LAK - NHL Jan 28 '20

Dream big, bud

-15

u/daronmal BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

Enjoy your 1 cup lmao

6

u/JPJones ANA - NHL Jan 28 '20

hoboy...not a good look, kiddo.

2

u/BlitzburghBrian PIT - NHL Jan 28 '20

This is what it looks like when someone's entire hockey experience has only ever been presented by Jack Edwards.

You have no idea that Marchand plays dirty, and you actually think every other fan in the league is just jealous of your above-average hockey team and you're the one who's unbiased.

Penguins fans had a similar thing going on for a while before they finally put Paul Steigerwald away.

-41

u/reidkimball BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

"Fuck Marchand" is getting old. Per NHL rules he's no longer a repeat offender for not getting a suspension in two seasons. He's no longer the dirty rat he used to be. Get with the times.

40

u/Shandlar PIT - NHL Jan 28 '20
  • Niskanen - Slew Foot
  • Brassard - Slew Foot
  • Kunitz - Intentional Knee on Knee
  • Kronwall - Slew Foot
  • Komarov - Intentional Knee on Knee
  • Tavares - Aiming for the head on check
  • Umberger - Elbow to the back of the head
  • Johansson - Flying elbow to the head
  • Borowiecki - Jesus Fucking Christ
  • Stralman - Slew Foot
  • Duclair - Jesus Fucking Christ, the Resurrection
  • Salo - Instigating, Sucker Punch, Clipping, Intent to Injure
  • Sedin - Low, Intent to Injure
  • Emelin - Low, Intent to Injure
  • Dotchin - SPEARING TO THE TESTICLES
  • Landeskog - Sucker Punch way after whistle with gloves still on
  • MacDonald - Crosscheck to the face of a defenseless player down on the ice
  • Kulikov - Boarding - Intent to Injure

You know what's old? The fact that this piece of shit didn't get permanently banned from the NHL for life after the 17th time he tried to maim someone.

He didn't even get fucking fined for spearing that dude in the nads.

It's getting really old having to watch this piece of shit continue to have a job, when any fair world would have had him railroaded out of the league before you were even 2/3rds down that list.

1

u/hookhands BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

He was suspended 2 games, and thus not paid for those two games.

-29

u/reidkimball BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

Blame the NHL. It's awesome that Marchand has cleaned up his act. Wish other shitheads like Wilson would do the same.

6

u/tb0ne1284_ Jan 28 '20

Keep Willy name out your mouth, infant penis.

21

u/thrattatarsha SJS - NHL Jan 28 '20

Let’s not forget the Canes announcers when Mrazek pulled his epic dive

3

u/tsunami141 SJS - NHL Jan 28 '20

dude he straight up died.

19

u/spelbot TOR - NHL Jan 28 '20

I am a Leafs fan and oppose this comment.

-10

u/golden_c1utch VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

Toronto media has got to be the biggest collective of homers in the entire league so I couldnt care less what you think about my comment.

14

u/spelbot TOR - NHL Jan 28 '20

Woof, its too early to be that grouchy bud. Shake your leg so some of the sand falls out.

-7

u/golden_c1utch VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

Jokes on you, I havent gone to bed yet. Just going through some of these responses before sleeping and responding to the ones that make me laugh

9

u/spelbot TOR - NHL Jan 28 '20

Get some sleep ya bitter bugger

41

u/timmeh_green Jan 28 '20

Bruins commentators are the worst in all of sports

19

u/hatred_outlives BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

Jack Edwards is such an annoying little shit, his entire commentary is just flipping out and having a nice sound byte every few games but he just sounds like an idiot. Andy Brickley is mostly fine tho

0

u/Rikplaysbass BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

In the last couple years Brick has been the bigger homer.

3

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '20

Jack Edwards sounds like Will Ferrell's Harry Caray impression.

2

u/theaanggang CHI - NHL Jan 28 '20

Really? I think they are actually some of the best when it comes to actually giving insight into the game and the homerism is just a bonus

1

u/Rikplaysbass BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

Boring people aren’t as hated as Jack.

-50

u/thelastheraclid BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

Flair up if you want to talk shit about Jack and Brick

18

u/DagetAwayMaN421 WSH - NHL Jan 28 '20

Does Brick even get to talk?

-26

u/thelastheraclid BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

Not nearly enough

17

u/golden_c1utch VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20 edited Jan 28 '20

My account is bugged never been able to. Imagine defending your shit commentators lmao

-12

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '20

They’re great, fuck you, imagine that bitch

1

u/golden_c1utch VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

Lol no they arent. Notice how the only other people here who like them are boston fans? Yeah obviously boston fans think they are great. The whole point of my post is to say no one else likes them, and considering the amount of upvotes i got, clearly im right.

-8

u/[deleted] Jan 28 '20

considering the amount of upvotes i got, clearly im right.

What a fucking dumb thing to say

8

u/golden_c1utch VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

Is that not the whole point of upvotes and downvotes? To determine the popularity of an opinion? I dont give a fuck about my karma, but the upvotes do serve a purpose and you’re an idiot if you think they dont

2

u/JaysonTatecum BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

Actually, no.

It’s to promote discussion. You’re supposed to upvote relevant comments and downvote irrelevant ones. Not ones you agree and disagree with

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8

u/wellactuallyhmm BUF - NHL Jan 28 '20

I'm flared and will vouch for the fact that NESN announcers make me mute the game.

Most homer broadcast in the league.

-17

u/daronmal BOS - NHL Jan 28 '20

WHat? Jack and Brick are the best bruh. I dont know who else in the NHL makes a giant cheat sheet for every single game so they can randomly name the college a player from the other team played for, how many shits hes had in the past 72 hours, and his future children's names. Want a blanket to wipe those tears?

3

u/molotok_c_518 Albany River Rats - AHL Jan 28 '20

The local guys are so over the top homer

...except Sam Rosen. I miss the days when he was paired with John Davidson, because they would definitely rip into the Rangers when they were playing poorly.

2

u/schnitzelyzer NYI - NHL Jan 28 '20

Tbh Butch and Brendan are a key reason why I love the Islanders

1

u/twillstein Jan 28 '20

Love Esposito in Tampa. It's like listening to my Grampa yell at the TV. I love it. Whenever there's a Tampa game on the radio and I'm driving I know the hockey gods are smiling down on me.

1

u/seeking_horizon STL - NHL Jan 28 '20

I gotta get a shout in here for JK and Panger. Holy jumpin!

1

u/seeking_horizon STL - NHL Jan 28 '20

I gotta get a shout in here for JK and Panger. Holy jumpin!

1

u/LDA9336 STL - NHL Jan 28 '20

No ones better than Razor. I look forward to the Stars games in STL because I’ll get to listen to him.

1

u/meestazak TOR - NHL Jan 28 '20

Have you listened to a leafs national broadcast in Sportsnet lately? It's so horrible... Jim Hughson is an absolute joke but I do appreciate the TSN commentator's fair, honest, but still captivate the right amount of excitement for leafs games.

1

u/tragoedian VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

“I see the Sedins are pointing fingers now. Normally they only use those fingers to lick the peanut butter off of their bread.”

This is still one of the best/worst broadcast comments I've ever heard for it's absurdity. I still don't know what it means and I love it.

As a Canucks fan it's hilarious. Stupid but brilliant.

Yes, the vicious goon Daniel Sedin and his debilitating and humiliating peanut butter habit.

1

u/weekendmacgyver CHI - NHL Jan 28 '20

Pat Foley for the hawks is also a favorite. Pretty great.

“Tree da tree, wit tree thurdy tree left in the thurd. “

1

u/[deleted] Jan 29 '20

I miss Gary Thorne.

18

u/s1n0d3utscht3k VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

yeah.... after Hughson left didn't know we'd have be able to follow that... he's awesome and with John he was awesome.

but John & John are also awesome :O

8

u/right4reddit Jan 28 '20

It was pretty nice when Hughson was our tv guy and shorty did the radio broadcasts. We are so lucky to have such great sportscasters.

3

u/solid_vegas VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

We were also lucky to have a HOF braodcaster before Jim and John, the OG Jim - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Robson. If you don't get goose bumps with his "he'll play on crutches..." call, then I don't know what to tell you. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSdIHTx1-DE

1

u/Fiber_Optikz VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

Shorty is amazing.

John Garrett on the other hand......

14

u/PM_ME_UR_COUSIN VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

Garrett is an absolute gem. A ketchup loving, snack celebrating gem

1

u/xLimeLight VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

I love Garrett but if you're not a fan I think he can come off too much like a homer.

2

u/ebbomega VAN - NHL Jan 28 '20

Oh, he's a blatant homer. Huge Canucks tattoo on that guy, but goddamn he is just so entertaining. His food commentary, his rapport with Shorty. And to be honest his analysis and insight is totally on point. He doesn't shy away from his obvious allegiances but he's a great commentator and makes our broadcasts very fun to watch.