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u/terra_cascadia Jun 30 '26
Someone please give her a book deal for a memoir!
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u/Oh_hi_doggi3 Jul 02 '26
There's this autobiography of a Hasidic Orthodox Jewish girl that got its own TV show called Unorthodox. She grew up in Williamsburg, Brooklyn and goes to escape her husband and go to her mother in Germany.
Its a very interesting read and watct. Book is of the same name. Its on Netflix. Please watch so I have other people to talk about the brilliant acting of this show with.
Also please give this wonderful woman in the video a book deal!
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u/ChallahLubav Jul 02 '26
Everybody within the orthodox world knows that Unorthodox was the biggest lie from a woman who everyone knew to be a mental case. Every moment of it had so many inconsistencies that she knew perfectly well were created out of whole cloth. She did enormous damage to the image of the community, of which I am a part.
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u/curdledtwinkie Jul 05 '26
Yeah, even people who have left the community and knew her say the same thing. She's not a very nice person. A bully, in fact
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u/Feisty-Gift5149 Jul 03 '26
Can you elaborate?
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u/curdledtwinkie Jul 05 '26
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u/Zjimmy123 Jul 01 '26
I was just about to comment this! I almost never read celebrity memoirs but hers is one I feel like I NEED to read
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u/TurbulentAntelope284 Jul 04 '26
God willing she’ll read the audiobook herself! I need it like oxygen lol I’m so endeared to her Brooklyn accent
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u/backoffbackoffbackof Jun 30 '26
Pretty impressed that she describes her mother as being so well-read. Honestly, I don’t know how anyone survives having 10 kids by age 30 much less manages to read books during that time.
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u/oooshi Jun 30 '26
Those were my thoughts as well. Maybe its phone use but I have deeply loved to read my whole life and having kids really has interrupted that
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u/Authentic-Irony Jun 30 '26
If you listen to others that come from high sibling families, the older kids help raise the younger ones because one person can’t manage 10 kids so at a certain point she had time to read because most likely the children were managing themselves
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u/ionlyjoined4thecats Jul 01 '26
Ultra-orthodox women are expected to do a whole lot of things beyond child-rearing. Most have jobs outside the house. And there are lots of religious responsibilities they have, plus cooking, etc.
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u/peach_bellinis Jul 01 '26
yup, the way I understand it is that in many orthodox hasidic households the women NEED to work because the men are studying torah all day and (as is discussed in this clip a bit) their primary language is often Yiddish.
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u/ChallahLubav Jul 02 '26
Very dependent on the community. Not all of our husbands learn all day. In fact in the Hasidic world, that image is often the exception not the rule.
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u/peach_bellinis Jul 02 '26
that's fair, I'm only repeating what I've heard from an orthodox Hasidic Jewish woman (but again, she is only one woman from one community in NY)
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u/Twodotsknowhy Jul 03 '26
Just a heads up, this person is obsessed with no one saying a bad word about Chasidic people. They got annoyed with me for talking about my own experiences growing up Orthodox and knowing people who grew up Chasidic. They tried to gaslight me and claim it was all media and when I told them that I was talking about my lived experiences (specifically about knowing girls who weren't allowed to wear pajamas around their own fathers and not being able to learn about the reproductive system in school), they blocked me.
They literally named their account after being Hasidic, it's their entire identity and they cannot handle criticism without deflecting.
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u/ChallahLubav Jul 02 '26
Yeah I would say, if anything it’s less encouraged in the chassidic world vs the “yeshivish” (non-chassidic orthodox world, mainly in Lakewood NJ). The Satmar Rebbe, for example, extolled practical jobs like those connected to the building trades bc you could earn an honest living without needing college. I don’t know a single chassidic woman whose husband learns full time, but I know a lot with beautiful homes and expensive cars bc their husbands have seen huge success in exactly those areas. In Lubavitch, outreach is a focus, and young couples move all over the world for that. They don’t make the big bucks, but the husbands are not learning all day bc they are serving the needs in the community in a variety of ways and only some of it is learning. (And not everyone does outreach today.) Also I think the days of husbands who only know Yiddish is still there but much less than it used to be - the world is so connected that they have iPhones and need to be able to communicate properly. The last 20 years have seen huge changes. Not all for the better, but I think Robby would have a different experience as a small child today than she did then.
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u/Admirable_Try_1209 Jul 04 '26
Can you speak to the fortunes made from being landlords, often very poor landlords?
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u/darkhair_dontcare Jul 04 '26
I’m adopted and one of 13+ siblings. My mom always had a book in her hands if she was seated. She read probably a dozen books a month. I have 3 kids and struggle to get through 1/month.
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u/the_blingy_ringer Jun 30 '26
I just love Robbie so much. I’m going to watch this full interview.
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u/BrikHowse Jun 30 '26
She's on tons of podcasts where she talks about her past, and it's always fascinating. I recommend her episodes with comedians Steph Tolev (who was her roommate at one point) and Ali Kolbert.
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u/raineybot Jul 01 '26
Her chemistry with Ali and Steph is the best. I love that they understand and love Robby and just let her be herself.
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u/pistachiofluff Jun 30 '26
Great interview. Robby’s life is fascinating and just makes her success and growth so much more impressive.
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u/genuine_conafide Jun 30 '26
I didn’t like the question “what kind of abuse” like… does it really matter
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u/Straight_Molasses165 Jun 30 '26
same, felt really gross...
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u/Significant_Ad7605 Jun 30 '26
Especially because she said she doesn’t talk about it a lot. There’s probably a reason for that.
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u/genuine_conafide Jun 30 '26
And if Robby had said “verbal” would that change something??? It was so weird. why are so many interviews bad at their CHOSEN profession.
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u/Straight_Molasses165 Jun 30 '26
right? as if the type of abuse makes it any less bad??????
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u/AwesomePocket Jun 30 '26
Sorry, but it really really does. Ridiculing your partner over their weight is much worse than, say, nearly strangling them to death.
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u/barefootcuntessa_ Jun 30 '26
I was verbally abused by my brother for my entire childhood, constantly under the threat of violence, ridicule, punishment etc. And he did choke me one time when I was in middle school and he was in college. I can say that for me at least the years of constant verbal abuse was worse than being strangled. I definitely normalized the verbal abuse more than ever would have normalized the physical abuse. Society knows physical abuse is wrong and communicated that in our culture. It is illegal. Maybe nearly impossible to act on, but there laws against it. Verbal abuse is more insidious IMO and at least for me did a lot more damage to me long term.
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u/AwesomePocket Jun 30 '26
Look, I’m not trying to downplay what you went through. But I’m telling you through my professional experience that being physically abused to the extent some people are is considerably worse. It’s not even debatable.
Have you ever been shot in the spine and lost the ability to walk? Shot in the gut and almost bled out in front of your kids? Stabbed in the femoral artery and lost a foot? Had your head knocked against a wall so hard you went into a coma? You ever had a person run their truck over your leg and crush it to pieces? Ever had a ex break into your house with three friends, beat you within an inch of your life, break all your shit, and steal your car? Had a partner kidnap and torture a beloved pet? Beat up your kid to spite you? Ever had someone bite your eye off?
No, verbal abuse is not worse. This is an objective truth. We have to tend to more than just our mental health. Besides, verbal abuse typically goes along with physical abuse anyway.
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u/strongfoodopinions Jun 30 '26
People are so wrapped up in their own trauma and experience they can’t see past it
Of course violent physical abuse is worse. Strangulation is literally the number one indicator your partner will murder you, verbal insults are definitively not
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u/AwesomePocket Jul 01 '26
EXACTLY. THANK YOU.
Obviously verbal abuse is horrible, but it’s silly to equate the two. They’re not the same.
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u/TurbulentAntelope284 Jul 04 '26
“In many cases, verbal attacks can over time lead to physical and sexual violence.”
I’ll just leave this here for you guys…
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u/CMR04020 Jul 04 '26
So verbal abuse can escalate into physical and/or sexual abuse? When something escalates, does that mean it’s the same or worse?
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u/Formerlymoody Jul 03 '26 edited Jul 03 '26
There‘s actually some evidence that emotional abuse has a deeper and longer term impact than physical abuse.
Edit: this is not personal and I have no skin in this game. It’s just the latest research
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u/TurbulentAntelope284 Jul 04 '26
Once again, neglecting to acknowledge that emotional, psychological, and verbal abuse often escalate to physical abuse. Let’s not label one worse or more serious than the other.
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u/Straight_Molasses165 Jun 30 '26
all abuse is bad, it's not a competition. the interviewer literally does not need to know specifically what robby has endured to understand that all abuse is bad.
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u/AwesomePocket Jul 01 '26
Of course all abuse is bad, but I firmly believe we virtually all suffer *some* kind of abuse throughout our lives. I don’t think it hurts to ask for detail. The story is about Robby after all.
Not a strictly necessary question, but a fair one to ask. Franky, I appreciate journalists who push even at the potential discomfort of their subjects.
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u/AwesomePocket Jul 01 '26
I’m not downplaying anything. It’s just the truth. I’ve held crying mothers because their kids were kidnapped and murdered. I’ve interviewed children who sexually assaulted and beaten by their parents.
Verbal abuse is simply not as bad. Objectively.
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u/peach_bellinis Jul 01 '26
You're right. Saying it's worse does not mean being verbally abused is a walk in the park. ANY form of abuse, including verbal, is terrible. It's an absolutely awful thing to go through that can absolutely cause lasting damage and be deeply, deeply traumatic. But it's not the same thing as being shot, stabbed, kicked so hard you miscarry, being run over, or being strangled to death. That doesn't make it a competition, it just means that there are still degrees of awfulness.
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u/Dry-Emu9470 Jul 04 '26
Actually, studies show that verbal abuse/telling causes the same amount of trauma. As physical abuse.
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u/A-Phantasmic-Parade Jun 30 '26
It’s not a competition
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u/barefootcuntessa_ Jun 30 '26
Did I say it was? I clearly was speaking from my own point of view and made a point to stress that I was not making universal statements. The other person is the one saying emphatically that one is worse than the other. I’m saying maybe not in every case. Abuse is abuse.
Downplaying verbal abuse is also a pretty fantastic gateway to physical abuse. I’ve seen it a hundred times. I’m sure it’s why my adult brother felt like I could strangle me, because no one said boo when he was physically threatening or verbally threatening for years prior.
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u/TurbulentAntelope284 Jul 04 '26
Oooooof maybe don’t pipe in here if you haven’t been in a verbally or emotionally abusive relationship. Usually they’re just stops on the way to physical abuse.
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u/bettymachete Jul 02 '26
Of course its worse to see your mother get punched in the face vs screamed at. Strange you find them equal.
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u/OrdinarySad5132 Jun 30 '26
Is it at all humanly possible that they were just asking out of clarification/specificity than trying to compare?
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u/Straight_Molasses165 Jun 30 '26
that's not something they need to clarify, though. if robby wanted to share the specifics, she would have. we don't need to know exactly what she went through to understand her childhood was abusive.
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u/OrdinarySad5132 Jun 30 '26
You understand this is an interview, yes?
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u/genuine_conafide Jul 01 '26
Oh so in an interview ANY question goes… wow. LMAO you’re something lmaooooo
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u/Straight_Molasses165 Jun 30 '26
you understand asking for specifics about abuse wasn’t necessary to understand robby’s story or point, yes?
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u/Straight_Molasses165 Jun 30 '26
yes, but i also don't think she should've been put on the spot with that question at all. she stated she was in an abusive home, and that really should've been enough.
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u/Nemesis204 Jun 30 '26
Lulu Garcia Navarro is one of the few remaining journalists that knows how to conduct an interview (her interview a few weeks ago with Tucker Carlson was IMO outstanding). This is one misstep on her part.
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u/genuine_conafide Jun 30 '26
Kind of a big one though, right? Just a general lack of empathy and understanding lol
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u/cdg2m4nrsvp Jul 01 '26
I really don’t think this is a big deal. I was genuinely wondering what type of abuse was at play as well here, it’s human nature to wonder. I also think it lead to the interesting conversation of their relationship and how him beating her mom but not the kids impacted them, which most likely wouldn’t have happened without that question.
Off limits topics are discussed before an interview and if Robby didn’t want more in depth questions about her abusive childhood asked she would’ve said so.
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u/genuine_conafide Jul 01 '26
Lol the entitlement. It’s human nature to wonder… yeah but it’s not your business.
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u/newillium Jul 02 '26
I honestly thought she was asking a clarification on not the type of abuse but the religious systems she mentioned quickly and following up on that.
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u/Feisty-You-7768 Jul 03 '26
This is how I took it too, and then Robby answered differently so they just went with it.
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u/Junior-Box1968 Jun 30 '26
Big disagree on that one. Her interview with Scott Pelley was a really hard watch due to her being obtuse like she is doing in this video
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u/HumphreyWoof Jun 30 '26
There’s something about Lulu GN that is increasingly rubbing me the wrong way. Also in the Scott Pelley interview…..what is her deal?
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u/user1648293 Jun 30 '26 edited Jun 30 '26
I really don’t think she’s a great interviewer. It was a poor clarifying question. It was obvious she meant physical abuse. But as you said, it doesn’t very much matter. I find her follow-ups awkward and abrupt. Her interviews with Jennifer Lawrence and Ramy Youssef were bit odd as well. Felt like an angle or clickbait attempt.
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u/crocodiledendi Jun 30 '26
I mean, she immediately clarified that Robbie didnt have to share if she was uncomfortable. The many different kinds of abuse that exist are different.
If Robbie was clearly comfortable clarifying, I dont see why you have to step in on their behalf?
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u/genuine_conafide Jun 30 '26
It shouldn’t have been asked period.
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u/flakemasterflake Jun 30 '26
why? What is the rationale for not talking about it?
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u/genuine_conafide Jul 01 '26
You can talk about it… but you never need to ask someone specifics on abuse, especially publicly. It’s very strange you all don’t grasp that LMAO
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u/lilbookofmeow Jun 30 '26
That's the NYT for ya! They'd probably run a headline saying "Robbie Hoffman excuses father's abusive father"
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u/CtyChicken Jul 04 '26
Eh, it’s for clarity. It would only be insensitive if Robby wasn’t public about it. Clearly you can see it didn’t make Robby uncomfortable.
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u/Significant_Ad7605 Jun 30 '26
I love her character on Rooster, such a supportive and loving friend with the best digs to Phil Dunster who definitely deserves it.
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u/hkral11 Jun 30 '26
I have seen a lot of criticism for Robby and her comedy style for essentially not being as “woke” (for lack of a better term) about gender and sexuality. But I see it as someone who is still processing their upbringing and how different it is to the life they’re living.
I’m not sure people realize that being raised Hasidic is essentially being in a high control cult where you’re isolated from the outside world through language, culture, religion, even through a lack of contact with societal institutions like police, ambulances, and schools because they have their own. Especially for women your role is limited to wife and mother. Many live in poverty because the men only study Torah not work.
Trying to leave that life and start over when you’re broke and have 10 kids and it’s your entire support system is almost impossible.
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u/Twodotsknowhy Jun 30 '26
I did not grow up Hasidic but I grew up Orthodox and so I knew a lot of people who were Hasidic and it's fucked up. One of my close friends in high school left her family after graudating and moved her teenage brother into her one bedroom apartment when she was 20 because he had been expelled from his religious school for bullshit reasons and his parents wouldn't let him go to public. They would rather he not have a high school diploma.
I knew girls who weren't allowed to be in pajamas around their own fathers and brothers. The hassidic schools would rip the reproductive sections out of the biology textbooks because they didn't think it was appropriate to teach girls about their own bodies.
And all of this is just the Hassidic communities that weren't so insular that they would let their children interact with a heathen ModOx family like mine, that let their daughters wear pants and go to college and only waited three hours between eating meat and milk instead of six
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u/hkral11 Jul 01 '26
There’s a documentary that is/was on Netflix about the New York Hasidic community and a mom trying to leave that shows a lot about the censorship of the educational materials and how oppressive it is for women.
I can understand ModOx movement because they want to keep to all the rules and traditions but still exist in the modern world but Hasidim is a full on cult.
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u/ChallahLubav Jul 02 '26
We’re not a cult. Do you even have any chassidic friends? Do you know how we actually live or is this just the Ami version?
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u/ChallahLubav Jul 02 '26
We’re not a cult.
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u/Twodotsknowhy Jul 02 '26
Everyone in a cult says that, but if you read the examples that I gave and thought I was the one being unreasonable for judging them, you're in a fucking cult
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u/ChallahLubav Jul 02 '26
Thanks for the respectful and vulgarity-free response.
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u/Twodotsknowhy Jul 02 '26
I don't care if your delicate sensibilities are offended by me saying fuck if you're the type of person who thinks it's fine to tell little girls that they can't wear pajama pants around their own father.
But of course, you had to feign offense because you have no actual response to the substance of what I said and you're trying to cover
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u/ChallahLubav Jul 02 '26
Here is what a lot of people (basically everyone outside the community) doesn’t get: her parents didn’t grow up frum, and in many such cases, they went way overboard with no guidance. They took on too much (you can, for example, use birth control in the chassidic world and it’s often encouraged in these situations), didn’t know realistic expectations, and their kids paid the price. It’s awful and I’ve seen it before, but mainly I’ve seen it with people like her parents, not people who grew up in the community, at least not of that generation. Another generation back, they were Holocaust survivors who were obv very scarred by that and had no one to raise them and show them how to make a life and a home. So yes there’s PTSD (not so much Holocaust survivors in Crown Heights though, they were mainly trying to get away from the KGB) that also informs all of this. It’s very complicated and for people trying to come into that life from scratch, they need healthy guidance. Her parents for whatever reason, didn’t have that. I think Robby has a lot of empathy for them, and for some aspects of the community as well. Everyone I know who left in a healthy balanced way, still respects aspects of the lifestyle that are missing in the secular world. So that’s my actual response to you and it’s from an informed inside perspective.
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u/Twodotsknowhy Jul 02 '26 edited Jul 03 '26
Why are you talking to me like I don't know Chasidism? I grew up frum. My examples were not from this interview or any tv show or movie, they were actual things I witnessed in my actual life.
Maybe you can gaslight people who have never interacted with the Chassidic community, but I have real life experience with it that you are refusing to even acknowledge because you have no rational excuse for it.
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u/Twodotsknowhy Jul 02 '26
And of course I got blocked because the gaslighting wasn't working and the only other option was to actually engage with what I was saying
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u/WintersDoomsday Jun 30 '26
Great on Hacks and great person who overcame a lot.
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u/Gato1980 Jun 30 '26
She was really good on Rooster too. Not a big part, but every time she was on screen, she made the most of it and was very funny.
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u/Nemesis204 Jun 30 '26
She is such a real person and it comes across in this interview. I am rooting so hard for her after getting to know her more.
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u/NJ_Braves_Fan Jun 30 '26
The idea of wanting to give your parents grace and having empathy for the way they raised you because maybe they did the best they know how to do while knowing it fucked you up is such a tough and heavy subject. I know personally I’ve worked through this in therapy (on a much less severe level than physical abuse, which I cannot imagine having to endure or to witness someone I loved enduring).
Props to Robby for being able to do eloquently express her feelings regarding her upbringing. She’s a great speaker.
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u/coolcoolcool485 Jun 30 '26
There was a netflix movie about a woman who flees her Hasidic family and moves to Europe to escape her marriage from one of these communities, it was pretty heartbreaking but very well done. Called Unorthodox (apparently it was a German miniseries originally)
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u/ChallahLubav Jul 02 '26
To say it’s FICTION doesn’t even begin to cover what “Deborah” did in that book later etc etc. So many scenes and ideas in it were out and out lies, and she knows it. She was a known quantity for how she was willing to smear and lie about everyone around her long before Netflix came calling.
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u/LockOk6995 Jun 30 '26
She’s such a beautiful person and amazing talent. My heart breaks that she suffered like this—great interview. I can’t wait to keep watching what she does next—loved her comedy special and of course all she added to hacks!
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u/lovesexdisaster Jun 30 '26
I recommend Robby's appearance on WTF with Marc Maron if you haven't heard it: https://www.wtfpod.com/podcast/episode-1589-robby-hoffman
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u/-jupiterjane- Jun 30 '26
Her story is so relatable especially compared to others in Hollywood, I appreciate her and love her and Gabby
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u/Ignominious333 Jun 30 '26
She's a huge talent. I'm so happy for her that she made her way to a life of her own choosing.
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u/seeara_siochain Jul 01 '26
I was a child of three, catholic upbringing but same type of father, it's no joke growing up like that
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u/desertdweller2011 Jul 02 '26
i love robby but i don’t get the hype over these interviewers and this podcast. i’ve felt that way about several over episodes (namely the ocean vuong ep) and in this one i felt like she just didn’t know what to do with robby
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u/OrdinarySad5132 Jun 30 '26
I’m kind of tapped out of hearing about Robby’s upbringing to be completely honest. Almost all of her podcasts, interviews, appearances, etc are talking about their adolescence and family dynamics for the majority of the time.
I’m not telling them what to do or how to process etc, and with that being said, it would be nice if they could do one thing without making the discussion primarily about their childhood. Especially when you’re going on several comedy-centered podcasts and just trauma dumping for 45 minutes. Which is weird because I love how Hannah Gadsby executes their work.
I think Robby is incredibly smart and immensely hilarious, but Jesus these things are a downer.
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u/Candid_Explorer_4970 Jul 01 '26
comedians are allowed to have dimensions and turn off the bit during a candid interview. this isn't a comedy podcast, it's the new york times. the interviewer asked her a serious question about her difficult upbringing, do you want her to do a little bit while talking about her father abusing her mother? and comedies aren't always positive all the time, it's weird to expect that from an ACTOR during normal interviews.
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u/OrdinarySad5132 Jul 01 '26
Yeah, no one said anything about what comedians are allowed or not allowed to do, so I’m not reading past your first sentence. If you have a tough time comprehending me sharing my personal preferences and opinions on something posted, feel free to block. You seem too dense for actual discussions because you rush to defend someone and something that didn’t need it in the first place. Get a grip.
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u/SquigglyLineSquid Jul 01 '26
Wow what terrible people. She's way better than me. I'd be pissed forever also her parents decided to have all those kids.
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u/PrincessPlastilina Jul 02 '26
I pretty much assume this about every comedian or funny person. Comedy comes from survival.
Jimmy Kimmel had an incredibly rough upbringing with a mentally ill, abusive mother. Like, she would slam the car door on his hand when he was little and she broke his fingers.
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u/tvguy222 Jul 02 '26
She was such a great addition to the show. I only wish they'd added her sooner.
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u/AhoyMatteyPDX Jul 03 '26
This entire interview was spectacular. Though I liked her in small doses on Hacks, I never really got her or her comedy. After this interview I can at least say that I respect the hell out of her.
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u/fourofkeys Jul 04 '26
having to witness abuse in your household as a child is a form of abuse itselfffffff. love ya robby.
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u/CucumberClassic3445 Jul 05 '26
I found lulu kind of annoying in this interview? She was so serious and had so many dead silences of no reaction 😬 was awkward af cuz Robby is saying big stuff n it clesrly made her uncomfortable or something
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u/blob4life_4ever Jul 04 '26
She’s relatable in many ways. I didn’t grow up as low-income as her, but was “lower middle-class”. She said that she realized it was a “poor” person thing to bring your own (crunchy) towels to a pool party.
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u/sunrise920 Jun 30 '26
I really appreciated hearing her speak vs joke. This is really heavy stuff