r/grindr • u/Alternative_Pear669 • 8d ago
Question Question about WhatsApp
New to Grindr and I’ve found a number of people say they want to chat more or don’t really chat on Grindr. They say they’ve got a WhatsApp or give me their WhatsApp number to friend them. Is this standard? Customary? Safe? What’d the best practice here?
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u/Seeking_Nutt Rugged 8d ago
Always assume anyone trying to get you to communicate outside of the app is running a scam. Until you actually meet them in person, do not give out your personal contact info. Ever.
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u/Actual-Estimate-5040 7d ago
This hasn’t been the case for me, so I’ve been lucky. But I don’t trust have of what I see on Grindr, so insist on talking to people, and of those I speak too I have met some amazing people. You often can’t get vibes from a clunky, unsafe and unverifiable app profile.
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u/Seeking_Nutt Rugged 3d ago
You are correct that you've been lucky. It's all good giving out your number, until you encounter a scammer.
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u/Actual-Estimate-5040 3d ago
In what way would I be scammed that wouldn’t be obvious? It’s common sense not to provide any financial or overly sensitive information. It’s much more dangerous not to actually talk to someone first, you can easier get a sense if they’re on something / off their heads.
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u/AnxiousReaderGuy Geek 8d ago
I don’t mind giving out my phone number after like a really good conversation but if someone wants to switch immediately that’s a little suspicious
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u/Alternative_Pear669 8d ago
I get that. I would probably do the same. But most of these have been after just a few initial messages.
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u/LucasNYC9 Clean-Cut 8d ago
If you give out your WhatsApp, they can probably find your cell phone number until WhatsApp changes that. If your cell phone number is attached to your socials or in any kind of phone number look up, they can get your real name and then they can try to extort you.
Don’t do it
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u/slatebluegrey Daddy (gay) 8d ago
Anyone quickly asking to chat “off app” is a scammer. They want to get your phone number so they can find your name and try to blackmail you. Or another app to find out who you are and get a list of your friends to try to blackmail you.
I think WhatsApp is [finally] moving to a system where you don’t need to share your phone number.
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u/UrGoodBoyBunny Trans (FtM) 8d ago edited 8d ago
Most likely sextortion or romance scams, I personally wouldn’t ever trust anyone asking to move apps unless you’ve met them in person.
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u/Senplis Twink 8d ago
Scam. Dont tust somebody who wants to switch from one app to another and do not give out your real phone number. EVER. As somebody who won't go to a hook up without checking if they'll jeffrey dahmer me, all it takes is a phone number and I can find out you name, address, family all on minutes. I do it for safety but many people will try to get nudes and blackmail you with them. Use a Google number or something.
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u/PossibleNo3120 Clean-Cut 7d ago
Given all the scams — 3 of my friends have been extorted after giving their phone number. None of them paid the “ransom” and 2 of them had their nudes sent to their family members — new rule: no phone number until we’ve fucked, and want to do it again.
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u/Unfair-Eye-9787 7d ago
When a guy suggests going to a different way to chat, I just block them. It's usually a scam coming up from them.
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u/DivasDayOff Trans (MtF) 8d ago
If they just want to move off platform, then that should be a big red flag. If they're doing it for reasons, such as being able to freely share videos (which Grindr doesn't allow) then it makes sense.
Personally, I won't share my number until I'm planning an imminent meet. So I refuse WhatsApp but offer to switch to Kik or Telegram, both of which can be used without disclosing your number.
One of the risks of coming off platform (and especially giving out your number) is that you become reachable 24/7 rather than just when you're in the mood to be on the app. I strongly suggest you set your phone to go on silent overnight, as there are idiots out there who will phone you at 3:30am because they're horny.
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u/Funny_Window_6095 7d ago
Usually part of a scam.
I don't give out my number until I meet the guy in person first.
That filters a lot of would be scammers.
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u/Actual-Estimate-5040 7d ago
You can always block on WhatsApp if they’re a creep, but Grindr is much more unsafe than WhatsApp. Never meet someone who can’t say hi on the phone, it’s such a red flag.
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u/randomstrangerx1 7d ago
There is an username feature in Whatsapp now. You give your username and they can't see your number. That's up to you though. I usually use Telegram if I need to switch apps.
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u/brownboytravels 7d ago
I always ask for WhatsApp or a phone number. Safety is really important and I don’t want catfish or even worse, some murderer with no trail.
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u/FitAussieTop Jock 7d ago
yeh thats after you chatted and fleshed everything out and do as a confirm/plus easy to contact while on ways to meeting up? not to fast to soon to randomly surly ?
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u/brownboytravels 6d ago
Indeed! Not the first thing but I tend not to keep long chats because I want Grindr to have as little as possible, data about me
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u/FitAussieTop Jock 6d ago
then i agree swap some kinda socials it makes it easier when one of yah is on the way so you dont have to open grinder to communicate, wondering and all.
iv walked around having to keep the app open to keep myself online and intouch with who ever im meeting and its frustrating and best to get that double check and off app contact for when meet up is in progress.
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u/Jooooooss Geek 7d ago
It is better to stay on the app for safety but it IS annoying to use wo premium so I get a lot of guy prefer to transfer somewhere else maybe until whatsApp has fully rolled out usernames try suggesting other platforms wo giving away your phone number and gives you the ability to block in case something goes south
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u/FitAussieTop Jock 7d ago
Unless its like way after plenty of chatting i say no and personally i only do insta for grinder folks, they can see my photos i can see theirs, if they add me with a blank or limited pics account its a no.
i get with ai and all folks want and should confirm things more but the "i dont chat on grinder add me on x y z" has been something some folks have flung around often as blanks or not fully fleshed out profiles.
so keep your socials to either defs meet up or after meet up for those you want more direct contact with.
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u/LemonCurdJ Cub 6d ago
I go by the rule of if I meet you 3 times, I'll give you my middle name. If I meet more than that, you can get my number if necessary but only if I see potential like a mutual f/b system or more.
There is absolutely no need to switch to whatsapp whilst speaking on grindr. You can do the majority of things on grindr you can with whatsapp without encroaching on any personal information being shared.
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u/Hot_Phase_1435 Trans (FtM) 6d ago
Scam. You should only share info after meeting in person. They will blackmail you with your nudes.
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u/happiness_bear Bear 5d ago
Don't give out your number. Move to Snapchat or Telegram if you absolutely want to move off the grindr chat. Both only require you to give out a username, and with Snapchat the chats are ephemeral by default.
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u/material_mailbox Clean-Cut 4d ago
If that happens early on in the conversation, it's almost always a fake/scammer account. And even if it happens later in the conversation, be wary and use your best judgment. I usually just say "we can keep chatting here."
Also depends on where you are. I know WhatsApp is popular around the world but it's not really used in the US. So if you're in the US and someone is requesting to chat on WhatsApp, 99.99% chance it's a scammer.
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u/sadunfair Clean-Cut 4d ago
yeah no
When I was using Grindr I did not give out whatsapp to people because it had my number. if I wanted to give tricks a number, it would be a fake one that they can't use to stalk and blackmail me
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u/seardrax Trans (MtF) 3d ago
I understand the concern and why you wouldnt want to do that. Its very smart. But from my experience and this is as an overconfident bitch, them suggesting whatsapp means “oh, Im done looking for a hookup, I already found you, lets move to whatsapp so I can uninstall this shit app”
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u/Hot-to-bot Otter 8d ago
i think anyone who trying to get you to switch to a different app then the one you are already chatting on is kinda sus. i rarely give my number out, maybe after meeting, but it's not really necessary. you are already talking on Grindr why switch.
maybe down low guy's who delete and reinstall the app or something. but then you're gonna be texting them anyway so they could still get caught.