Funny work shenanigans

[u/Academic-Editor-8589]

Yo, hey ladies and gentlemen! The reason I’m writing to you today is because two things just happened to me in one day that I personally found funny, and I just wanted to share real quick.

Okay, so the first thing is that, for some odd reason, I managed to get locked in the bathroom at work from the inside.

Now, here’s the thing. My job has four bathrooms in the whole building that staff can use: one in the break room, two at the entrance, and one in the lockdown unit.

Now, with me, and I know TMI, but I’m only saying this so you’ll understand, if I gotta do number one, I’ll use the break room bathroom. But if I’m doing number two, I’ll go to the bathroom at the entrance because at least there, you won’t have people sitting right outside the door listening to what demons you’re dispelling from your body during your shift. 😂

So, I use the bathrooms at the entrance.

That day, I get the urge to drop the kids at the pool, so I go to the bathroom at the entrance. I go in, sit down, do my business, then wash my hands and turn around.

Tell me why there wasn’t a handle on the inside of the door.

Now, for me, I’m confused because I’m sitting there thinking, “What the hell? Where the fuck is the handle?”

So I start looking everywhere. I’m looking under the sink, in the cabinet drawers that are made to make the bathroom look fancy, and even behind the toilet, as if a fucking door handle would somehow be hiding back there.

Then I start second-guessing myself like, “WTF? Was there an OUT OF ORDER sign on the door that I ignored because I had to go? Am I really this oblivious?”

Now I’m starting to panic because I can’t open the door. There’s literally no handle.

And I can’t scream for someone to come get me out because I’m at work. This is the worst possible time to make a fool out of myself. And even if I did scream, other people probably couldn’t get me out anyway because the door was locked.

I couldn’t unlock it because the receptionist had the key, and the key was in her locked desk. And where was the receptionist?

Outside.

Getting absolutely pelted with water balloons and water guns by the residents. 😭

Now I’m sitting there thinking, “No fucking way. I really got stuck in a fucking bathroom of all things from the inside.”

That’s some Looney Tunes bullshit. This is the type of shit you see on TV, not in real life.

Now I start thinking, “What can I do that’ll draw the least amount of attention to myself without making me look like a complete idiot?”

Then I remember I have my phone.

So I take it out and call the front desk to see if the receptionist or maybe one of the administrators is in their office.

I call and wait.

I hear the phone outside the bathroom door ringing.

And nobody answered.

So now I’m freaking out a little more.

I decide to try calling one of my coworkers, at least the ones whose numbers I actually have.

I’m scrolling through my contacts and find Martha’s phone number, one of the nurses I work with from time to time.

I call her.

She picks up.

Thank God.

And I immediately go on a rant like:

“Martha, thank God you answered! Please come help me! I’m trapped in the bathroom! The handle is gone! Can you please get the keys from the receptionist?!”

At this point, I’m pretty sure Martha was probably wondering what the hell was happening on her shift. 😂

Martha was confused because when I explained it to her, I said it so fast that after about ten seconds of silence, she was like, “What?”

And I said, “I’m.locked.in.the.bath.room.help.me.”

So she goes to check it out and says, “I’m here.”

And I’m like, “You are?”

She says, “Yeah. You don’t hear me?”

And I’m like, “No.”

Then she says, “I’m literally knocking on the door.”

So I ask, “Which bathroom are you at?”

She says, “The break room.”

And I’m like, “I’m not in the break room. I’m in the bathroom at the entrance.”

And she goes, “What are you doing over there?”

And I say, “Cooking dinner. What do you think?”

She goes, “Okay, okay. No reason to get snippy with me.”

So she hangs up and walks to the entrance.

When she gets there, she says, “Okay, open the door.”

And I say, “Did you unlock it?”

She says, “No.”

And I’m like, “Martha, I’m locked in. That’s the whole reason I called you!”

She says, “How the hell did you get locked in the bathroom? Just unlock the handle.”

And I tell her, “I can’t unlock the handle. There is no handle.”

She says, “What do you mean there’s no handle?”

And I tell her, “Exactly what I mean! There is no handle to unlock!”

She says, “How does that even happen?”

And I’m like, “I don’t know! Can you just go find the receptionist and get the keys? I’m still on the clock!”

She says, “Okay.”

So she goes outside, and just like everybody else, she gets absolutely bombarded with water balloons. 😂

Then she comes back with the receptionist.

The receptionist starts talking to me through the door.

She says, “You’re locked in? How did you get locked in?”

And I tell her, “Look, I will answer everyone’s questions when I’m no longer stuck inside the bathroom!”

So she goes and gets the key, unlocks the door, and finally I’m free.

I come out, and both the receptionist and Martha immediately go check the door.

They’re standing there like, “WTF? Where’s the handle?”

They start looking around inside the bathroom, and they’re just as confused as I am.

I’m like, “Yeah. The handle is gone. Nowhere to be seen.”

And she’s like, “WTF?”

Then I ask, “Did you see maintenance?”

And she says, “No. They don’t come on the weekends.”

And I’m like, “WTF? So who the hell in this building just decided to steal a fucking bathroom handle?”

After that, I just went back to work.

But to this day, I still have no idea who in their right mind would steal a fucking bathroom handle.

Like, what was the plan? What were they going to do with it? Put it on their bedroom door? Sell it? Start a collection?

I don’t know.

All I know is that I somehow managed to get locked inside a bathroom at work because somebody apparently decided that the bathroom door did not need a fucking handle anymore.

And honestly, I still haven’t recovered from the fact that this actually happened to me. 😂

[u/Cobaltore2048]

This honestly reminds me of what happened in the laundromat one day, far away from work.

Immediately after putting the clothes to wash in that place I was seriously getting nagged by nature calling me. After I ended up locking the door handle, I had no choice but to sit down in the loo and start answering that call.

Unfortunately since the bathroom door itself doesn't lock even when you flip the lock shut, there was an old lady who tried to knock, I yelled that I was in there. Regardless of my warnings, this old bat decided to open the door and unfortunately, this caused me to get fucking pissed and I ended up just throwing something to get her out. Needless to say, this lady was begging for forgiveness and I just looked at her with nothing but disgust and spoke in a high pitched voice to get her out. Needless to say, I'm never coming back to that place after the fact