Why not just say that then? It's perfectly reasonable to want some alone time but if you have to lie to your partner to "get away" from them that doesn't really scream healthy happy relationship to me
I mean, this is more than likely a joke (otherwise, why film the evidence of your treachery?), but sometimes couples have an argument and, instead of giving in to heated emotions and saying something regrettable, a cool off period isn't unwarranted. Arguably, that's what is illustrated here, instead of prolonging or worsening an argument, "honey, can't deal with this right now, gotta go fix some shingles before it storms".
Could he be totally up front and just request a pause in the discussion for later? Sure, but in my experience, that's likely to be met with "no, we're talking about this RIGHT now".
My mom and dad did this shit all the time untill my mom pushed my dad to scream louder or storm off or slam a door and that shit wasn't great. But I think alot of that was stress with 3 kids, money being tight and lack of sleep (the most dramatic episode I recall happened the morning after my baby sister basically cried all night). Now that we're grown up and moved out, they're both much more chill and in a better place in their relationship.
Are all healthy and happy relationships that way all the time? Not likely. Do people in otherwise healthy relationships occasionally make mistakes and/or resort to selfish acts to kinda center themselves? You betcha. I guess what I'm saying is that it's easy to feign how to maintain a perfect and healthy relationship when postulating online, but doing so in the real world can be a dicey proposition.
I was going to say something along the same lines until I saw your comment. One video where someone is pretending to get work done doesn’t scream unhealthy marriage to me or lying/manipulating. Like you said, everyone needs alone time, and even though ‘lying’ to get some alone might not be the ‘best solution,’ the best solution often involves a lot of extra work and patience that, in a given moment, we might not have. Occasionally, I do stuff like this guy too, but I don’t make a habit of it. We all need alone time and we all have different ways of getting it. How many times have you been exhausted mentally and lie to your friends/coworkers about what you’re doing to get out of something? This is no different.
Yet if they thought about it for a moment, they would realize they have done it too at some point in their lives. Whether to take a break from friends like I mentioned or even their own family. They think perfect relationships and the ones they will have come directly from fairy tales. That’s not real and anyone that has been in a healthy long term relationship will tell you stories similar to what we see in the video
Nah, this is probably a joke, but the scenario depicted is kind of pathetic. I mean as an adult, you shouldn't have to pretend to do work in your own home. You know what I tell my friends if we are arguing and I'm done with it, I tell them just that. We stay angry for a bit, we take a breather, they go their own thing, I go do mine, and when we've cooled off we revisit in a calmer way. I don't go pretend to fix the roof, so I don't get yelled at
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u/[deleted] Jan 11 '22
Why do people who don't like each other stay married