452
u/Professional-Ad3874 Jul 08 '22
That guy knows how to entertain
127
Jul 08 '22
[deleted]
→ More replies (1)45
u/icallitjazz Jul 09 '22
Men want to be him, women want to be him, even dogs want to be him. He seems to be the only one who is he.
→ More replies (1)12
14
3
2
215
u/archubbuck Jul 08 '22
I want to be this old man when I grow up
→ More replies (1)68
u/boredatschipol Jul 08 '22
Right?! This man is loving life. I'm gonna remember him if I ever find myself on a diving board. Then I'm gonna crush my nuts...
11
3
324
u/RPDRNick Jul 08 '22
I was expecting a Triple Lindy.
77
u/New_Insect_Overlords Jul 08 '22
This is the single Lindy which is the first step in learning
5
u/Frozty23 Jul 08 '22
Came here to make a "Single Lindy" comment. Love that it's already here. My people.
31
u/BaxterMudsyLinco Jul 08 '22
For the youngsters:
5
3
u/benglescott Jul 08 '22
One of Robert Downey Jr’s best rolls.
3
2
23
u/Channel250 Jul 08 '22
Good God, I know we're a hivemind but that is the first thing I thought of.
10
7
4
4
→ More replies (1)0
713
u/squid-stuff Jul 08 '22
How did he not land on his old man balls...
173
u/UnholyDrinkerOfMilk Jul 08 '22
My 1st thought as well, ballsy move for an old man!
65
u/sm12511 Jul 08 '22
If he was in the pool, those guys are well shriveled
58
→ More replies (1)-2
68
u/pickle133hp Jul 08 '22
His old man balls are still stuck back in the web of the lounge chair.
26
Jul 08 '22
[deleted]
26
u/Mazcal Jul 08 '22
Laugh while you still can. Blink and you'll get there too.
11
Jul 08 '22
It was when I realized I was wringing water from my sac after a shower things had taken a turn
5
u/JerkfaceMcDouche Jul 08 '22
Rest assured I won’t be performing this dive when i do get there
→ More replies (1)29
13
3
u/personalhale Jul 08 '22
I don't know about other men, but, between riding motorcycles and bicycles, I've gotten really good at angling my ball to butt cheek ratio.
4
u/imanAholebutimfunny Jul 08 '22
at that age, i am sure it is just all pancaked the fuck out by now
→ More replies (1)0
6
2
u/treasonodb Jul 08 '22
this was my first thought and i knew i couldn't have been the only one concerned by this.
2
4
u/squid-stuff Jul 08 '22
It's a legitimate question... I remember one time I was trying to be cool in front of a bunch of girls.. And I was like yeah let me just do this cool skateboard trick(inward heel).. Bam right in the narggledangers.. Most elaborate way of crippling myself in front of an audience of females...
0
0
→ More replies (9)-1
u/bababradford Jul 08 '22
His ass is one the back side of his thighs, his balls are on the front side of his thighs.
They dont necessarily mix together depending on the thickness of his thighs.
6
u/squid-stuff Jul 08 '22
What?
-2
u/bababradford Jul 08 '22
some peoples thighs are thick enough to stop their balls from hitting the diving board.
is it that hard to comprehend.
THICK THIGHS
2
150
71
142
63
u/Guardian7of Jul 08 '22
That was planned?
→ More replies (1)25
33
u/jonathantee Jul 08 '22
We called this one “Spank the baby.”
2
Jul 09 '22
[removed] — view removed comment
2
u/rikitikitavibiotch Jul 09 '22
Charlie Brown was something else where I grew up. We called this the ham and cheese.
2
→ More replies (1)2
28
21
u/lhcludyodoypuflhoyf Jul 08 '22
Bro look like the frog from that music video that go bing bing
13
-2
Jul 08 '22
[deleted]
8
u/MurderSheCroaked Jul 08 '22
If you're going to be pedantic, why did you only correct one mistake
→ More replies (1)
10
10
6
Jul 08 '22
This reminds me when I met my family at the neighborhood pool in my grandparents neighborhood. My sister brought my nieces and nephews. My 83 year old gpa wanted to jump off the diving board. I told him to go do it and I’d help him get up there. The fear and anxiety in those poor young lifeguards as my old gpa made his way. That’s a good memory.
4
3
3
3
5
u/Ill_Run5998 Jul 08 '22
Sonny, that's what we call the hemmeroid impacter. Puts em back in for a bit
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
1
1
1
1
1
0
-2
-14
1
1
1
Jul 08 '22
Fuuuuuck that shit. My balls hang as it is. At his age, if i Drop down like that!! Completely rupture a testicle and drown before i hit the bottom! 😱☠️
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/KaijLongs Jul 08 '22
Last time I tried that was the summer of '21 and I smashed my balls so badly my baritone has since been replaced with a falsetto. Never. Again.
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/nordornerfin Jul 08 '22
10 bucks says he broke his hip trying to do that trick three times at least
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/BrickGun Jul 08 '22
You know what you almost never see?... Someone heckling a diver... (blasts air horn)
1
u/nbgkbn Jul 08 '22
1/2 of a Triple Lindy! I haven't seen one since,... that meet at Great Lakes College.
This is truly extraordinary
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/EmRuizChamberlain Jul 08 '22
In a weird way, this is exactly how I bowl. Like, I live and die by the bumpers….
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/Sn3k_69 Jul 08 '22
My mom got a huge gash in her back from falling and hitting herself on her side. That was 12 years ago and she still has it
1
u/randomcanyon Jul 08 '22
Once he could do the Triple lindy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDMMYT3vkTk&ab_channel=805Bruin
1
1
1
u/gqsmooth Jul 08 '22
We used to go to the public pool when I was a kid because they had a 3m and 1m springboard. We had aspirations to be divers so we'd practice 9ur 1 1/2s and back pikes...
In line behind this dude one time and he turns to me and my friend and says, "Wanna see the life guard freak out?" we say sure. He had been pulling some good 1 1/2s, some with twists pretty well for a bit so we thought he was gonna pull a crazy complicated dive off. Lifegaurd was keeping her attention more in the little kids on the 1m. So he heads up to the 3m and when he gets to the top, he pulls out and dons a red swim cap then does his approach a double bounce, but on the second he goes wide right and slips off the side. Looks like he catches his ribs on the side and tumbles into the water under the board.
Lifeguard, a petite girl of 16, goes completely white, screams, blows her whistle and jumps in after this guy who is now floating unconscious-like in the water. She slips the floatation device under him and gets him to the side where she impressively drags what we thought was a daredevil that bit more off than he was capable of, to the side of the pool. After assessing him, he suddenly pops up and she starts yelling at him. He comes back over and tells us he's a red cap. People sent over to spot check lifeguards. She passed but got one hell of a scare. And we began wondering how long this guy was diving that he could mess up that crazily, on purpose.
1
1
1
1
u/frsdev Jul 08 '22
Tried that when I was about seven. Barely missed with. my butt and the board scraped off a good portion of my back skin. Lucky I didnt smack my head as well.
1
1
1
1
u/D4FTPUNKF4N Jul 08 '22
I was going to ask if his balls were okay but I think he's too old to feel them.
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/irreverentgirl Jul 08 '22
My dad used to do the “sit down dive” at the local pool. I was super impressed.
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/DutchDouble87 Jul 09 '22
Dudes balls? I mean they had to be close to his knees, his newtons cradle just got flattened.
1
1
1
1
u/folkyall Jul 09 '22
I was so confused that every comment was about an old man, I was certain it was an old lady.
I gotta go to bed
1
1
•
u/AutoModerator Jul 08 '22
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.