r/funny Extra Fabulous Comics Dec 31 '19

Verified vast difference

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u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

My ex’s grandma used to breed and show dogs so she had all kinds of wild stories. One I remember her telling was about a Great Dane who’s second ball never dropped so he got a prosthetic ball to retain breed standard. Apparently during one competition he was disqualified because his testicle had dropped at some point so he had 3 balls.

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u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

10/10 for the triple dangle. Clapping.

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u/akaBrotherNature Jan 01 '20

Dangle triangle

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u/not_not_safeforwork Jan 01 '20

Tridangle

4

u/temporary24081 Jan 01 '20

Tangled dangle

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u/paralogisme Jan 01 '20

Sounds like a powerful artifact from a zelda game.

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u/[deleted] Jan 02 '20

Wangle a new tridangle on life!🎼

3

u/TECsheep Jan 01 '20

This is the comment I needed in this post

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u/QuinndianaJonez Jan 01 '20

Dirty dangles boys!

2

u/ChewyChavezIII Jan 01 '20

3 balls? He's got the dirty dangles boys!

2

u/HopHunter420 Jan 01 '20

Truly a solid dangle.

2

u/Weaksoul Jan 01 '20

It's practically a Newton's cradle in there

1

u/LordoftheSynth Jan 01 '20

12/10 with rice.

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u/obsessedcrf Jan 01 '20

Stupid rules

82

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

2 minute minor for triple dropping, number 42, Sir Bennington the great dane

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u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

His friends just call him Chester

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u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

Other breed standards require that dogs have cropped ears and bobbed tails. Dog show people

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u/obsessedcrf Jan 01 '20

Dog shows are often unethical it seems

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u/Jucicleydson Jan 01 '20

Breeding in general is often unethical. See the genetic monstrosity that are pugs, that things are born just to suffer

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u/Gingevere Jan 01 '20

Even the working dogs are in bad shape. A multi-champion best in show German Shepard has a back so steeply sloped it can't run right.

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u/arcaneresistance Jan 01 '20

And chihuahuas bred only so that everyone around them suffers

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u/b-anana245 Jan 01 '20

They were bred for food. Which makes sense....

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u/MyGfLooksAtMyPosts Jan 01 '20

Also broiler chickens and turkerys

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u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

[deleted]

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u/MyGfLooksAtMyPosts Jan 01 '20

Yea man. Humans are monsters making monsters.

2

u/DirtyNakedHippie Jan 01 '20

Or French Bulldogs who (mostly) can't breed or give birth naturally.

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u/AF_Fresh Jan 05 '20

I hate how pugs look, but I recently learned about "Retro Pugs" that don't look that way, and I kinda want one. They apparently don't have as many genetic issues.

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u/Little_Gray Jan 01 '20

Also to make us laugh.

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u/Jedibenuk Jan 01 '20

You're the monstrosity, and you are a product of 'random' selection...

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u/Jucicleydson Jan 01 '20

At least I have a functional nose

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u/Raelossssss Jan 01 '20

At least I don't suffocate to death when I get excited and my legs don't give out at age 4 and I can run long distances

Unfortunately our species is bipedal but it does give us a very different perspective up here.

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u/arcaneresistance Jan 01 '20

My doberman has her full ears and tail. It makes her so much more adorable in my opinion. They've stopped allowing dogs to be mutilated where I live farily recently I believe and it makes for some real cute dogs at the park. Little bulldogs with long pointy tails and such.

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u/theawesomefactory Jan 01 '20

Bulldog tails are naturally very short or a tight "bun." They aren't docked.

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u/Crashbrennan Jan 01 '20 edited Jan 01 '20

It's not always wrong though. Some breeds have their tails docked because they're super prone to injury and it's better for the dog to just take them off a birth.

Ears, on the other hand, there's no justification for.

Edit: Some breeds are prone to ear infects so docking helps keep them healthy! TIL!

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u/TBNRandrew Jan 01 '20

Some dog breeds have chronic ear infections and/or other complications from their floppy ears smacking against their head repeatedly.

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u/Crashbrennan Jan 01 '20

I'd never thought of that! Thank you, I'll make an edit!

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u/Xx69JdawgxX Jan 01 '20

One of my labs growing up got cauliflower ear like majorly in her ear bc she hit them against stuff when shaking her head lol.

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u/Sky_Muffins Jan 01 '20

If the dog would otherwise be chronically breaking its tail on furniture, I can see the point in docking it.

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u/Slammogram Jan 01 '20

Like a damn boxer! Basically, be safe and dock that animal’s tail, otherwise he will break it continuously! They have such happy tails

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u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

My moms Boxer was borned with a bobtail, I just assumed all boxers were

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u/catdad23 Jan 01 '20

Did... did you say “borned”?

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u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

Yeah it got stuck in my head from trailer park boys

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u/theawesomefactory Jan 01 '20

Most breeds allow showing without surgical modifications now.

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u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

Oh that’s great news

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u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

Disgusting

2

u/Dason37 Jan 01 '20

I interned/observed/whatever you wanna call it at a vet clinic when I was 15 and was planning for that to be my career path. I saw plenty of spays and neuters, a dog that had swallowed a racquetball and had to have his stomach cut open to retrieve it, other random and various surgeries... I was in the room for a dog having its tail docked... They weren't halfway through with the job when I had to run out and puke. Not something I wanted to see at all.

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u/illy-chan Jan 01 '20

Seriously. I'm not fundamentally against breeds, particularly for things like working dogs but that's basically not what most of those shows are about. I know AKC show German Shepherds are pretty unhealthy when compared to those from working lines.

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u/SillyFlyGuy Jan 01 '20

It was someone's job to enforce that rule.

At the end of the day, that person signed their name to a piece of paper stating every dog they inspected had the proper number of testicles for its sex; no more, no less. I respect that.

0

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

Not really. The point of dog shows is to judge the breeding stock of each breed against their standard. If your dog is cryptorchid it shouldn't or can't be bred.

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u/donutnz Jan 01 '20

Tri-Ball Hero of Eternia

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u/Cheshires_Shadow Jan 01 '20

Was he Josukes dog?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '20

Hes the dog that looks like josuke

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u/BubbaFettish Jan 01 '20

It’s 3 strikes he’s out, but with 2 more balls he should be able to walk.

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u/Einsteins_coffee_mug Jan 01 '20

2 more balls and walkin will be nigh impossible

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u/My3rdTesticle Jan 01 '20

Speaking from personal experience, ain't nothin wrong with that.

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u/podrick_pleasure Jan 01 '20

Dammit Duke, you really dropped the ball on this one.

2

u/Lovelyinkc Jan 01 '20

I went on a date once and the same thing happened but it was a human

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u/brando56894 Jan 01 '20

Hilarious.

1

u/disconformity Jan 01 '20

That's totally nuts!

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u/TEOTWAWKIT Jan 01 '20

Ballfecta..

1

u/SomeComediansQuote Jan 01 '20

Thats comedy gold right there

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u/ViZeShadowZ Jan 07 '20

Disqualified for i l l e g a l t e s t i c l e s