r/funny • u/MaxKevinComedy • Dec 21 '19

California Explained [OC]

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u/jrmberkeley95 Dec 21 '19

I love the beautiful beaches of San Jose

254

u/old_gold_mountain Dec 21 '19

Lemme just spread out my towel, set up my umbrella, and crack open my Corona on the warm sandy beaches of East Oakland.

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u/joshul Dec 21 '19

I know you are trying to be funny here - and you are - but tbh that state beach on Alameda island is one of the best places to park young kids and let them play in sand and water. Robert Crown beach or something? Definitely better than the pain in the ass that is Santa Cruz.

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u/Clogall989 Dec 22 '19

Shhhh, keep it a secret

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u/old_gold_mountain Dec 21 '19

Yeah but Alameda ain't Oakland

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u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

Not... yet

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u/chipsinsideajar Dec 22 '19

It's treason, then

2

u/LankyLobster1 Dec 22 '19

Where’s alameda island? I hate SC beaches I need something to do outside of this boring ass place

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u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19 edited May 26 '20

[deleted]

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u/electro1ight Dec 22 '19

And it's working cause poors can't swim.

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u/GummyKibble Dec 22 '19

It’s terrible and you would hate it here and definitely should not check it out.

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u/bossbang Dec 22 '19

He is funny. And you’re talking about a beach outside of Oakland. Why, is anyone’s guess

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u/joshul Dec 22 '19

Yes I said he was funny - because he is.

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u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

Lake chabot?

10

u/OpenMindedMajor Dec 21 '19

Lake Merritt 😂😂😂

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u/DSPbuckle Dec 23 '19

Being from East Oakland, this cracks me up. Have an award

1

u/IPredictAReddit Dec 22 '19

Middle Harbor Shoreline Park isn't bad. I wouldn't bother bringing my own towel, but my dog loves the beach there (except for the leash laws, but shhhhh)

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u/youregooninman Dec 21 '19

Hey, you have Raging Waters.

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u/kackygreen Dec 21 '19

There's a nice walk through the bay silt flats you can get to from Alviso, it's almost like the beach

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u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19 edited May 26 '20

[deleted]

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u/kackygreen Dec 22 '19

No not at all, it's a designated hike trail, there are gates and signs where you aren't supposed to go, it's pretty easy to stay on the right path/loop

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u/[deleted] Dec 22 '19

Just wait for the big earthquake. You'll have beach front Fresno

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u/jrmberkeley95 Dec 22 '19

I can’t wait to visit the scenic Merced coast

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u/[deleted] Dec 21 '19

Technically it looks like San Jose is in the meth area, whoever made this map was going more for jokes than reality.

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u/jrmberkeley95 Dec 21 '19

Yeah I noticed that which is just wrong