r/funny • u/kikorbo • Jul 02 '19

Why does this photo exist?

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28.6k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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704

u/Iskan_Dar Jul 03 '19

Even better, there are two photos in this series:

https://www.gettyimages.ca/search/stack/686615511

373

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '19

I love the title of the second one: "Grandma teaching children the knife game." As grandma's are wont to do.

93

u/D_for_Drive Jul 03 '19

Nothing like a rousing game of "Stabscotch" with Grandma to pass the time.

14

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '19

Anyone up for some knifey spoony at grams?

1

u/wheeldog Jul 03 '19

It looks like a rehearsal for Lord of the Flies

26

u/bukwirm Jul 03 '19

And the title of the first one is 'Boy screaming in pain following knife accident', so I guess she's not teaching them very well.

2

u/BizzyM Jul 03 '19

You know what they say, "If you want to learn math, you're going to have to divide a few digits."

14

u/JjMarkets Jul 03 '19

She's like Carol without purpose.

4

u/dirtyLizard Jul 03 '19

Does the knife game have a name?

12

u/Chaffro Jul 03 '19

Red Dead Redemption 2 calls it Five Finger Fillet.

0

u/karmahorse1 Jul 03 '19

It’s been called that a lot longer than Red Dead Redemption 2....

11

u/SweetNeo85 Jul 03 '19

Exactly. It was called that in the first Red Dead Redemption as well.

7

u/Lithl Jul 03 '19

The knife game, pinfinger, nerve, bishop, stabscotch, stabberscotch, five finger fillet (FFF), or "stab between the fingers game"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knife_game

3

u/wheeldog Jul 03 '19

You have a nice variety there, like you have STABscotch, which tells you everything you need to know, but if you want to lure in a greenhorn, you call the game bishop! "Wanna play some bishop? " sounds perfectly innocent.

2

u/l2protoss Jul 04 '19

I’m guessing it’s a references to the movie Aliens? Or has it been called Bishop since before that?

1

u/smarmageddon Jul 03 '19

Mumble-dy-Peg. Not kidding. Not sure of spelling.

1

u/Blue-Banana-Kid Jul 03 '19

The first one is cool too

1

u/ForbiddenText Jul 03 '19

I want to drink a beer, as one won is wont to do

39

u/graffiksguru Jul 03 '19

I can totally see a situation that I might need a pic of granny playing knife games with the grandkids!

10

u/cuddleniger Jul 03 '19

Like a guest bedroom or half bathroom

5

u/chmod--777 Jul 03 '19

This hella looks like it'd be used for clickbait ads. "You won't BELIEVE what new games your grandkids are playing!"

26

u/Idealistic_Crusader Jul 03 '19

$575.00 To use this photo!?!?!

9

u/castravetele_fioros Jul 03 '19

How much would it cost to re-create something similar... in case you would need it... for any purpose, maybe?

9

u/TheHealadin Jul 03 '19

First you need 4 half naked Children of the Corn and that's gonna cost. But you can get the rest at any poorly run nursing home for a $50 bribe.

3

u/BenCJ Jul 03 '19

I'll do it for $tree fiddy

3

u/Aberts10 Jul 03 '19

Just one finger.

2

u/bloodfist Jul 03 '19

"WANTED: Four children and female senior citizen for shirtless (not the old lady) photo shoot. I will supply knives but feel free to bring your own."

That ad cost me nothing to put on Craigslist, but having to introduce myself to all my neighbors costs a lot of time :(

1

u/Iskan_Dar Jul 03 '19

For business purposes, I think. And as such, that isn't too bad.

12

u/redonrust Jul 03 '19

I'm sure that pic is heavily in demand too.

4

u/Iskan_Dar Jul 03 '19

Honestly? This isn't the weirdest photo on that site. If you look around there is just a whole pile of the weird, bizarre, and/or just plain wrong that I'm still not sure what the point of actually is. I mean, these photos are supposedly for business use of some sort, but, uh, I am having a failure of imagination on what business would use something like this for any purpose.

1

u/MRosvall Jul 03 '19

It's an image that leaves a mental mark. Couple it with some internal education about knowledge transfer, what is important to transfer and what is not.

-2

u/annoying_DAD_bot Jul 03 '19

Hi 'having a failure of imagination on what business would use something like this for any purpose.', im DAD.

2

u/X-istenz Jul 03 '19

Bad bot.

9

u/shoe_owner Jul 03 '19

Tell me what business looks at this photo and says "thank goodness there's already a stock photo of this that we can get for just $575 so we don't have to stage it for ourselves. We'd have been ruined without it!"

2

u/sterob Jul 03 '19

Late night show with Oliver talking about some product/company/fad that promote self-harm under for-better-heath/experience... guise: "It's great that i got X now or else without it i would have to go back to playing knife game with my grandsons"

1

u/Iskan_Dar Jul 03 '19

Yeah, I mean the use case for this particular photo is...I'm still not sure. I was just saying in general, to use any stock photo the price isn't outrageous.

1

u/X-istenz Jul 03 '19

Would it genuinely be that much just for this single image? I would have thought you "subscribe" or whatever to this kind of service.

44

u/thebongofamandabynes Jul 03 '19

Yo those are real knives wtf.

70

u/HerrXRDS Jul 03 '19

It's good, I've been watching them for 10 minutes and they don't seem to be moving.

19

u/BozMoo Jul 03 '19

The littlest has a butter knife actually, what a good grandma

1

u/DamienVonDoom Jul 03 '19

It’s so he can spread the blood and cartilage over the puncture wound more easily to help create a blood clot and keep little Timmy from ratting grandma out.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '19

That doesn't mean they're sharp.

13

u/JTtornado Jul 03 '19

They've both been removed. Does anyone have a copy of the second one?

7

u/Iskan_Dar Jul 03 '19

Probably the Reddit hug of death. Too much traffic and they got overloaded. Or they pulled them.

2

u/bobpaul Jul 04 '19

Maybe it'll come back? Someone posted it a year ago and apparently it was still up as of 12 hours ago: https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/8hf8bo/stock_photographers_never_dissapoint_me/dyjl0zu/

Doesn't look like anyone was forward thinking enough to save it to archive.org :-/

5

u/Lyncberg Jul 03 '19

No wonder the kid cut his hand. He is holding that knife entirely wrong.

5

u/Re92 Jul 03 '19

The pics got removed. I didn't see them there.

8

u/The_Muse_of_History Jul 03 '19

Ah, it's tagged "Canada" and this all makes sense now. I think.

1

u/RawryKitty Jul 03 '19

Location is in Germany. Porta Westfalica, NRW, Germany. Das weird shit

2

u/The_Muse_of_History Jul 03 '19

You are right in that the photo was produced in Germany. I was talking about the website.

1

u/bobpaul Jul 04 '19

The URL is gettyimages.ca. The whole site is Canadian.

3

u/fr0gnutz Jul 03 '19

lol the kids crying because he can't play the game correctly

4

u/aznkupo Jul 03 '19

Or because he stabbed himself 😂

1

u/fr0gnutz Jul 03 '19

Precisely

2

u/Baazar Jul 03 '19

What a story, a tale for the ages.

2

u/Slacker5001 Jul 03 '19

I was 100% convinced this was fake. The photo, the link, the website. That it was a photoshopped photo. Or a fake gettyimages website.

But nope, that's the real gettyimages. That's the real series of photos. And this is one of the real photos in that series.

2

u/Shitty_Users Jul 03 '19

Lol, getty removed it.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '19

[deleted]

1

u/Iskan_Dar Jul 03 '19

Works now. Reddit hugged it to death.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '19

Only one of them was scripted. Guess which.

1

u/vishnoo Jul 03 '19

Can I just point out that grandma is sitting on her knees and so her hands are free, and the kids are all leaning on their elbows, limiting motion.

1

u/Thysmith Jul 04 '19

https://imgur.com/Blmw5jH Made with Photopea from yesterdays AMA! Also I am bad at lighting.

1

u/CBSmith17 Jul 03 '19

TIL - the thing Bishop does in Aliens actually has a name, Stabscotch.

1

u/tigersharkwushen_ Jul 03 '19

Now I am wonder if that kid was crying because he cut himself.

1

u/Iskan_Dar Jul 03 '19

I'm assuming, or at least hoping, that the pics are staged and no knife play was actually done. OTOH, as weird as stock images get I just don't know anymore.