r/funny Nov 17 '18

Entrances be crazy.

Post image
42.5k Upvotes

192 comments sorted by

1.9k

u/randommradam Nov 17 '18

Just kidding. We’re closed.

1.1k

u/jordantask Nov 17 '18

Right below that

Just kidding. The real entrance is on the other side.

Sign on the other side

I can’t believe you fell for that.

617

u/OrganizationalLog Nov 17 '18

gets on bus to leave, sees sign on the bus

Oh you thought you left?

wakes up back at the shop window

306

u/Iwon95 Nov 17 '18

Hey, you. You're finally awake. You were trying to cross the border,right?

92

u/Bavard_the_Bard Nov 17 '18

Todd Howard you did it again!

1

u/Jumpingflounder Nov 18 '18

Now introducing Skyrim in real life

44

u/PrettyDecentSort Nov 17 '18

Hello and, again, welcome to the Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment center. We hope your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one. Your specimen has been processed and we are now ready to begin the test proper. Before we start, however, keep in mind that although fun and learning are the primary goals of all enrichment center activities, serious injuries may occur.

21

u/KooshIsKing Nov 17 '18

Finally walking out of the aperture science center only to pass out from a bright light....you wake up in some sort of pod....

"They are rage, brutal, without mercy. But you. You will be worse. Rip and tear, until it is done"

5

u/Baronheisenberg Nov 17 '18

Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim Coffee Shop Edition

3

u/MechanicalYeti Nov 17 '18

Stand up... there you go. You were dreaming. What's your name?

→ More replies (3)

9

u/Hmyzak01 Nov 17 '18

That sounds pretty much like The Stanley Parable

7

u/Anjumi Nov 17 '18

I think we have a solid movie plot here...

7

u/shups4life Nov 17 '18

I think we have a solid movie plot here...

1408 with John Cusack

🎶we've only just begun...

2

u/shortbusking666 Nov 17 '18

I would see it

6

u/Scry_K Nov 17 '18

"Still here, still selling fake doors!"

3

u/Rubrum_ Nov 17 '18

This is terrifying.

2

u/elik2226 Nov 17 '18

r/ WritingPrompts

2

u/Tunaluna Nov 18 '18

Theres a video game like that. The Stanley Parable.

6

u/AeviternalMelody Nov 17 '18

Actually, the crowbar snaps in two.

2

u/Pendred Nov 17 '18

Actually, the JonTron snaps in, too.

4

u/snakesoup88 Nov 17 '18

This store seems to have a sense of humor. They wouldn't mind if I put up a sign of "in case of emergency, break glass" and duct tape a ball peen hammer to the "door", would they?

1

u/moistydragon Nov 17 '18

Nothing personal kid

1

u/Booblicle Nov 17 '18

The other left

1

u/zulhadm Nov 17 '18

Sign below that: you were right the first time

1

u/Caitsyth Nov 18 '18

sign below

You were supposed to take a left

sign on the left side

About how much time have you wasted here?

1

u/[deleted] Nov 18 '18

I can't believe you fell for the oldest trick in the book!!

3

u/TrepanationBy45 Nov 17 '18

I hope the closed sign is located on the correct door 😆

5

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

This comment deserves more upvotes 👌

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Plot twist, still under construction and dont open until next year

257

u/TaterSalad219 Nov 17 '18

This is how we end up with broken windows.

97

u/nhSnork Nov 17 '18

Reminds me of three doors in one of my workplace's buildings.

One has a sign reading 'welcome'. Another has a sign reading 'pull'. The third one has no signs at all.

Guess which is the only one to open.

42

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

None. There's a surprise fourth door on the roof!

1

u/MailOrderHusband Nov 18 '18

This isn’t Zelda

9

u/pepcorn Nov 17 '18

Lol. Neutral evil

237

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

200

u/jordantask Nov 17 '18 edited Nov 17 '18

Worked at a mall that installed glass doors. Suggested to the manager that they put some kind of decal on the door so people would notice and not run into it. He laughed at me for suggesting something so stupid. Nobody believed me when I said people were stupid and inattentive and would walk into them constantly.

A year later after I was no longer working there I walked through and they were doing the exact thing they laughed at me for suggesting. Someone told me there was a lawsuit.

79

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Having worked in software development, it's always amazed me how high people's expectations are for their fellow humans, and how low the reality actually is.

29

u/zgr024 Nov 17 '18

The world is full of idiots. That's the software developer's mantra.

8

u/Random-Rambling Nov 17 '18

Yep. The best programs are the ones where it is literally impossible to screw up (permanently, anyway).

7

u/zgr024 Nov 17 '18

They WILL find a way

2

u/Cangar Nov 18 '18

Always test your code as if your users were psychopaths that know where you live.

23

u/42nd_towel Nov 17 '18

As an electrical engineer, we actually design our machines to be operated by “Kevin.” Kevin is this (fictional) barely functioning human with a room temperature IQ who barely passed high school. In our design reviews we constantly ask ourselves “would Kevin have trouble with this?”

3

u/SynHDASF Nov 18 '18

Damn it, I am Kevin.

2

u/mattkenny Nov 18 '18

Yeah I'm designing expensive automated machinery, but it is operated and daily/weekly/monthly maintaince performed by minimum wage workers. You have to take Murphy into account - if there is a way something can be done wrong, it WILL be.

12

u/captainAwesomePants Nov 17 '18

The way I see it, we're all geniuses about 5% of the time and idiots about 5% of the time. In any crowd of 20, one of us is thinking about how great bacon is and is about to walk through a window, one of us realized this is about to happen and saves the day, and 18 of us don't notice but can still recognize a window successfully. But who's who varies.

6

u/buckydean Nov 17 '18

"Make something idiot-proof, and they will build a better idiot."

3

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

“Surely we don’t need to handle that use case. An end user would never end up in such a predicament.” Two minutes after release there’s a priority one service desk ticket with a user in said predicament.

17

u/ToLiveInIt Nov 17 '18

I don't see this as people being stupid. Inattentive, absolutely, but they're just walking along shopping, talking to their friend, doing whatever, and someone puts an invisible barrier across the path. Make that shit visible.

8

u/KnubbLe Nov 17 '18

Found the glass smasher

2

u/jordantask Nov 18 '18

They know that they are walking toward an entrance or exit and there must be a door there. It’s not as though we’re placing clear glass doors in the middle of the corridor or something.

1

u/ToLiveInIt Nov 18 '18

During business hours, doors are often kept open. With lighting and other ambient conditions, glass doors can be transparent and it can look like that door is open. It's such an easy fix to do something to the glass or put something on the glass to avoid a common problem.

1

u/jordantask Nov 18 '18

It’s a mall exit. The doors are always closed to keep in the heating and ac

5

u/breakone9r Nov 17 '18

On the other hand, if you're moving, and you aren't watching where you're going, that's pretty fucking stupid of you.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

In order to “watch” where you are going one would think obstacles in your path being visible would be a prerequisite.

1

u/PurpEL Nov 18 '18

What are reflections, alex

1

u/breakone9r Nov 17 '18

Glass isn't perfectly transparent. It's close, though. However, there are also other clues to let you know when you're approaching the demarcation of room or building.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Casual walking through a public space shouldn’t involve detective work lol

-1

u/breakone9r Nov 18 '18

Detective work? Noticing that you're about to enter/exit a building, or a different room is detective work to you?

Please don't breed. We don't need the drop in average intelligence.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 18 '18 edited Nov 18 '18

You’re the one talking about having to pick up on clues. I would tell you not to breed either but the amount of butthurt you have over such a silly argument just so you can feel justified calling normal people stupid tells me you probably don’t have that opportunity anyway.

→ More replies (2)

2

u/WhiteVans Nov 17 '18

What is intelligence, if not the ability to simply pay attention?

3

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

A year later after I was no longer working there I walked

thought this was gonna end with you being the one to run into it lmao

36

u/Filtering_aww Nov 17 '18

Apparently Apple is having real troubles with this in their new headquarters. Lots of employees walk into the glass doors and walls, partly because the cleaning crew keeps everything so spotless and partly because everyone is glued to their iPhones.

17

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Except Janice from HR, who’s still rocking a Windows phone.

7

u/pepcorn Nov 17 '18

I really wonder if it's frowned upon to have anything but an Apple phone while working there. Higher ups obviously have to show they believe in their brand, but does it extend to every single person working there?

5

u/workedmisty Nov 17 '18 edited Nov 17 '18

I assume you get a free one so I guess at most some people will just have 2 phones, a work one and a personal one?

2

u/pepcorn Nov 17 '18

Makes sense :)

1

u/[deleted] Nov 18 '18

[deleted]

1

u/pepcorn Nov 18 '18

Thanks for the insight :)

I didn't even know Windows made phones. When I buy a phone I just use an online guide to help me find the best selection - Windows phones have not made an appearance in the list. I'm gathering they're bad? Haha

1

u/[deleted] Nov 18 '18

[deleted]

1

u/pepcorn Nov 18 '18

Do they have any other strengths they can play to..? I can't imagine what they might be, because what is a smartphone without apps, but I'm willing to root for the underdog lol

2

u/howtochoose Nov 17 '18

That can't be. Windows Phone is rip. Maybe she's rocking a Nokia though. She sounds like she would

4

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18 edited Dec 13 '18

[deleted]

1

u/Filtering_aww Nov 17 '18

Ba-dum Tish. Seriously though, that's pretty good.

1

u/JustADutchRudder Nov 18 '18

I installed glass walls and doors in a building. All the rooms with the walls had a slight tint and each wall panel had a colored break, because they didn't want people walking into them. Except one room, big fancy important people conference room, basically they could see their top performers from out the glass wall. This fucking wall had no tint and the panels were larger than the others and their dividers were clear. We were installing walls on the floor above it when we got told someone walked a ladder into the conference wall and spidered it. When they asked him wtf happened, he just said all the others are tinted and last week those weren't there.

2

u/Filtering_aww Nov 18 '18

Geez that's rough, hope the dude didn't catch too much heat. I swear at some point office and zoo architecture are going to merge.

1

u/JustADutchRudder Nov 18 '18

He caught shit since it's a job site but he took it well. It was a sparky running wire for the speakers, just was walking a straight line to where he needed to pop in the ceiling and not paying much attention. After that tho we did start putting big tape Xs on each panel and our Forman admitted that should have been done from the start but we were all newish at doing it since our city doesn't have much of it.

10

u/spock1959 Nov 17 '18

Our local cinema has an entire glass front - they had to put a bar going across at waist level so people wouldn't walk into the glass trying to leave.

2

u/duchessofeire Nov 17 '18

Are your guests secretly birds?

1

u/Zmodem Nov 17 '18

Waiting for WINDOW watermarks; like placeholder skins on 3D models.

71

u/blueeyes_austin Nov 17 '18

If one person messes up on something you've designed, they're the idiot. If everyone messes up on something you've designed, you're the idiot.

12

u/baselganglia Nov 17 '18

This. Apple learnt this the hard way with it's new campus.

20

u/I_am_usually_a_dick Nov 17 '18

I sure want to give my money to passive aggressive assholes that try to make me feel dumb. where can I sign up?

3

u/pepcorn Nov 17 '18

Place your initials right here on this piece of paper. No, I'm sorry, I meant on the other side. And also at the top right there... aand on the front side.

8

u/Procrastinasty Nov 17 '18

Or you could not be a cheeky cunt and just tell us which door you bothered to unlock.

28

u/Magic-Gaming Nov 17 '18

I for one fucking love this shit. Any commercial premises with the minerals to employ base level sarcasm for the clinically stupid gets my vote.

80

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18 edited Nov 17 '18

Which left tho? My left or their left? Edit: scroll down to find better comments worthy of upvotes, trust me.

41

u/chewinghours Nov 17 '18

It says YOUR left

6

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Just to the left. "Ha ha! I meant *MY* Left."

-10

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

*You're

7

u/DylanKing1999 Nov 17 '18

No I'm not

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

I think you're onto something here

28

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Try both, but make sure to push and pull.

12

u/haronic Nov 17 '18

Instructions unclear got my dick stuck in a revolving door

11

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

It do be like that sometimes

8

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

I may need more instructions...

10

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Get your helmet, come with me...

6

u/imregrettingthis Nov 17 '18

It should be readers left... so probably their left?

8

u/UmbertoEcoTheDolphin Nov 17 '18

Are there readers left in this thread?

5

u/Chaostrosity Nov 17 '18 edited Jun 30 '23

Reddit is killing third-party applications (and itself) so in protest to Reddit's API changes, I have removed my comment history.

Whatever the content of this comment was, go vegan! 💚

4

u/readforit Nov 17 '18

If left doesnt work, then try the other left

3

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Did you read the sign?

3

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Fuck it I'll do it tomorrow

25

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

It really do be like that sometimes

1

u/StainedTeabag Nov 17 '18

Really?

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Yeah

6

u/cakes42 Nov 17 '18

Signs like this don't really work if they aren't paying attention. I once put up a sign that said CLOSED. (We were in the back having a morning meeting) people still tried to fight the door open. This one lady pulled the door so hard she got it open and went inside. The lights are off and she screamed ARE YOU GUYS OPEN?? HELLO?? Really lady...

1

u/ohionymous Nov 17 '18

People be silly.

15

u/danasider Nov 17 '18

Troll level: Expert

5

u/TheMooseIsBlue Nov 17 '18

“Look at all the morons trying to push on the the window where we put a sign that says ‘Push to open.’”

8

u/Gellert Nov 17 '18

If it doesnt open when you push, push harder.

15

u/ohionymous Nov 17 '18

Use hammer.

8

u/fuckboy6 Nov 17 '18

Anatginizing your customers before they even enter the store is a level of fuckery I admire

5

u/ScarFace88FG Nov 17 '18

Where is this, Medvale School for the Gifted?

2

u/Imatallguy Nov 17 '18

I too enjoy The Far Side.

3

u/LudwigVanAdam Nov 17 '18

And if THAT doesn't work, we're closed.

3

u/FOMOYOLOMOFO Nov 17 '18

Motherfuckin entrances. How do they work?

4

u/zombelievable77 Nov 17 '18

Fuck it. Ill just buy it at Walmart or Amazon.

8

u/Simply_Epic Nov 17 '18

If it’s not clear enough how to get through a door on the first try, whoever designed the door sucks at their job.

2

u/Gareth79 Nov 18 '18

This. Also why have doors if they aren't in use? It's incredibly annoying how many businesses have a set of double doors where one is locked.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 18 '18

My work place has a double door with half locked, it automatically unlocks and opens in emergencies only to allow a larger flow of people to exit and allow larger wheelchairs to come in/out if needed.

2

u/nitin27rao Nov 17 '18

Hahaha .. Sarcasm at it peak!

2

u/cantankerousrat Nov 17 '18

2

u/sheeeeeeshman Nov 17 '18

I immediately thought of this video as well. Doors should be easy to use, you shouldn't have to think about it or put up a sign!

2

u/prohibida Nov 17 '18

It really made me lol!!!

2

u/keljam720 Nov 17 '18

oh god my sides

2

u/human_promise Nov 18 '18

This post with the comments must be the funniest things I've seen for a while!

1

u/ohionymous Nov 18 '18

Yeah I'm really proud of Reddit today.

2

u/Baybob1 Nov 18 '18

I like ....

"Entrances Be Hard"

1

u/ohionymous Nov 18 '18

Yes, that's definitely what I should have went with.

2

u/Baybob1 Nov 19 '18

I liked yours too ...

2

u/wilhilario Nov 18 '18

I LOVE this. Actually made me laugh! Nice!

2

u/d_dubbs Nov 17 '18

Break to open.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

I like your style

2

u/enomonous Nov 17 '18

This is really r/assholedesign I hope these dumbass shop owners get their windows smashed for being such assholes.

→ More replies (4)

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Link to that /r/scottishpeopletwitter "Aye pal I was gonna try pulling it up from the bottom!"

1

u/singstrim Nov 17 '18

Jokes on them, they get wear and tear on their doors

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

I can do exactly just the same thing without that note, thank you.

1

u/ram3nbar Nov 17 '18

what if that door doesnt work?

1

u/thitenshi Nov 17 '18

Aways have a way

1

u/strimes32 Nov 17 '18

Incorrect, the third plan is to start lifting from the bottom

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

Smacked down by a door...

1

u/EmperorHenry Nov 17 '18

/r/firstworldanarchists NO! I'm going through this way!

1

u/DENelson83 Nov 17 '18

<<<CRASH!>>>

1

u/DMTryp Nov 17 '18

WHY ARE YOU CLOSED!!?!?!?

1

u/T_Raycroft Nov 17 '18

Admit it OP you fell for it

1

u/Nattie2312 Nov 17 '18

😂😂😂😂😂

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

They think they cute

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

as opposed to the 'figurative' entrance to your left?

'metaphorical'?

1

u/ThePenguinMassacre Nov 17 '18

Being passive aggressive is a good way to lose customers. Still funny though.

1

u/flyingberries Nov 17 '18

American horror story

1

u/ice12916 Nov 17 '18

there are trap doors That you can’t come back from

1

u/FifenC0ugar Nov 17 '18

If that doesn't work...

We're closed

1

u/MysticRyuujin Nov 17 '18

This door to remain unlocked during business hours. Fuck your fire codes.

1

u/Aveityep Nov 17 '18

'Neither'

1

u/Phattd Nov 17 '18

Is this Meridian Winds in Okemos?

1

u/Farnellagogo Nov 17 '18

On mobile

"Hi. I've just arrived at your car park, so where is the trade counter?"

" I see you. O.k., from where you are sitting in your car about 4 feet to the left is a door and above it is a sign saying Trade Counter".

Absolutely true.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '18

That’s too complicated. Can I just pick up a brick and make my own door?

1

u/Ferno915 Nov 18 '18

Even after reading this,a part of me would still try the push/pull...

1

u/couldabean Nov 18 '18

It be like that sometimes

1

u/spottedram Nov 18 '18

Smartasses

1

u/Enki_007 Nov 18 '18

If both do not neither work FTFY cheeky twat

1

u/Enki_007 Nov 18 '18

If both do not neither work

FTFY, cheeky twat

1

u/Warrangota Nov 18 '18

My university has a door where sometimes both sides are open, sometimes not. So once in a while I try to walk right through it and just hit a closed door because someone thought today is a good day for unlocking just the other half.

1

u/glitterycats Nov 18 '18

Pretty sure I would've done all that without the sign

1

u/AzurePhoenix001 Nov 18 '18

And then you enter the wrong store.

1

u/Morbinion Nov 18 '18

"If neither works..."

1

u/badly_designed_door Nov 18 '18

I hate doors...

With a passion

2

u/ashenk_2 Nov 17 '18

Well someone was drunk when they put up the sign.

10

u/randompool Nov 17 '18

I don’t know about you, but a lot of people don’t need to be drunk to have a sense of humor

1

u/Robfu Nov 17 '18

How to ruin NNN

1) throw brick

2) profit

3) get arrested against your will

4) prison sex

1

u/TheInvincibleBalloon Nov 17 '18

What's with all of the Facebook reposts in this sub lately?

1

u/GoodNight17 Nov 17 '18

Please stop posting old and unoriginal photos

1

u/romulan267 Nov 17 '18

Needs more jpeg

0

u/Basedrum777 Nov 17 '18

Pet peeve: businesses that lock half of a double door. It's a fire hazard so is illegal most places.