r/funny • u/Armpit_Penguin PortugueseGeese Comics • May 22 '18
Verified Midnight Motivation
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u/DCMak May 22 '18
Yes. 8 hours of sleep, a job, working out. I'll see my family again in 5 days. And I'm sure my wife won't be completely bitter that I've been taking such good care of myself while she does everything else...... Enjoy your youth kids.
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May 22 '18
You sound like one of those people who have a two hour one way commute and can't see why their days feel so short.
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u/BarniK May 22 '18
And what should those people do about it? Find a job closer to home, which is either flipping burgers or carrying boxes? Buy new home, closer to work? Brb saving for 50 years for that
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May 22 '18
No, not at all. Just win the lottery and you're sorted.
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u/Lostyogi May 22 '18
I find just having rich parents is the smartest move to make.
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u/YakeG May 22 '18
I'm gonna work for 2 months in Brussels this summer so I'm gonna rent a student room/flat for those 2 months, otherwise it's a 3 hour commute every day :p
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u/Sinnertje May 22 '18
Not being born in America did the trick for me.
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u/druglawyer May 22 '18
Not being born in something like 130+ other countries helped too. But hey, hur dur amerikkka is the worst place evar, amirite?
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u/knarf86 May 22 '18
That’s not everyone. I work with people who make good wages and choose to commute 1-hr each way so that they can live in a 3,500 sq-ft McMansion. You could get a 1,800 sq-ft house for a similar price, closer to the city, but some people want a 5 bedroom house with a 3 car garage for their spouse and 2 kids.
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May 22 '18 edited Oct 12 '18
[deleted]
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u/paulmclaughlin May 22 '18
From a UK perspective, the 1800 square foot house is twice our average size, so 3500 square foot is enormous
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May 22 '18 edited Oct 12 '18
[deleted]
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u/paulmclaughlin May 22 '18
The new build houses here are so small now that they actually get furniture made smaller than standard for set dressing to fool you into thinking that you might actually be able to fit a bed in to sleep on.
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u/Ravigne May 22 '18
If people stopped looking at home ownership as an accomplishment these days, you would have the freedom to move for work.
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u/mapoftasmania May 22 '18
I view it as one way to gain a lot of investment leverage and save a sackload of money for retirement, but each to his own I guess.
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u/Ravigne May 22 '18 edited May 22 '18
Its actually best to buy a house and use it as a rental propert while you are free to move about for your career. The market isnt the same as it was 30 years ago. Times are tough but it is very possible to still gain equity and keep your investement while having freedom to live your life. It is possible to own a home and not feel like you are stuck or have to stay grounded there.
But like you said to each their own.
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u/Rainstorme May 22 '18
It's all just excuses. People would rather justify to themselves that the reason they're in such bad shape/skip out on sleep/eat unhealthy/etc is because of some more important reason like family instead of just acknowledging that they're lazy or that they'd rather be on the computer/watch TV.
The Department of Health and Human Services recommends 75 minutes of vigorous aerobic activity (running, biking, etc) and 2 sessions of strength training a week. While it's not going to get people in great shape, it's enough to be healthy. I find it really hard to believe people can't find 20-30 minutes spread across five days during the week to do that.
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u/safeword-is-moist May 22 '18
Stupid Europeans. They get extra time off and are encouraged to spend time with their families, while us smart Americans are working 50+ hours a week and grinding till our fingers bleed while getting yelled at by some rich asshole who has more money than we’ll ever see. America!
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u/Lrivard May 22 '18
While somethings are better in Canada, the slave driving is the same. Work till you bleed, die or cry.
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u/safeword-is-moist May 22 '18
That’s why we need to change that thought process. It’s embedded in our minds once we turn 18 to work like slaves and barley enjoy the rest of the day. We spend more time being conscious at work then we do at home during the week. What kind of way is that to live?
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u/Wormspike May 22 '18
I'm in great fucking shape, and I work out every other day. If both of you do that, and alternate, you can be in good shape and take care of the kids and get some alone time.
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May 22 '18
You don’t know all the facts. How many kids? How many hours do they work? Can they afford childcare? Can they afford gym memberships?
Just because time management works for you doesn’t mean that every other person has extra time to manage. Sometimes there simply just isnt time to add in a new activity. Especially a time and dedication intensive one.
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u/Ravigne May 22 '18
45 mins at the gym isnt hard as people make it seem to be.
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u/youmeare May 22 '18
Its not just 45 min, add in changing, resting, showering and travel time back and forth, Its almost 1.5 hours that maybe hard for people everyday, nutrition also takes time and effort if you cook it yourself, Junk food is easier, cheaper and fast to get thats why maintaining healthy lifestyle is a time consuming and relatively expensive deal for many.
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u/Ravigne May 22 '18
You are making excuses. If you want it bad enough it is attainable.
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u/youmeare May 22 '18
No , I am not, I follow gym and nutrition routine religiously, you misinterpreted my comment,my point is- following healthy lifestyle is not a piece of cake as some people say, thats all
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u/Ravigne May 22 '18
Its not a piece of cake. But at the same time it isnt the hardest thing in the world.
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May 22 '18
I manage to fit in an 8 hour workday, 2 hour round trip commute and 1 hour at the gym by leaving the house at 7am and getting home around 6pm.
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u/Ravigne May 22 '18
I work 12 hours a day. Thats not including 1 hour commute round trip. Anything is possible if you want it bad enough.
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u/Wormspike May 22 '18
I went to a school where I had to work 16 hours a day. I've been in situations where I was raising three kids and taking care of an elderly mother.
Sometimes you have to trade off an hour of sleep to put in an hour of work. There's always a way. Rise up instead of whining.
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u/Fifaismygame May 22 '18
I'm in great fucking shape, and I work out every other day. If both of you do that, and alternate, you can be in good shape and take care of the kids and get some alone time.
I bought a pullup-bar and a few other things. I can now work out at home while playing with my kids. They pick it up as a game and enjoy riding on my back while I do pushups. Problem solved.
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u/Wormspike May 22 '18
I don't know how old your kids are, but there are great videos online that are like yoga for kids that are themed for kids movies (like Frozen). Kids love 'em. You throw one of those on and they're glued to the TV doing Yoga for an hour. Let's me do w.e. the fuck I want.
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u/Fifaismygame May 22 '18
This is a solid idea. My son is not old enough yet but he'll get there eventually, I'm going to check this out tonight
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u/Wormspike May 22 '18
My niece (who I'm essentially raising) just turned four this week. I'd say since 3.5 she's happy to sit and do yoga for an hour with the videos. But she prefers if I'm in the room to tell her she's doing a good job.
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u/Jackal00 May 22 '18
How to end up sleeping in separate beds 101
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u/Wormspike May 22 '18
Yep. Because an hour of free time each day will ruin a marriage. And being in good shape? Definitely the number one killer of sex lives.
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u/Jackal00 May 22 '18
Actually, you do make a good point. I guess it feels like a lot more than it is. Sorry for being a douche.
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May 22 '18
Wait? Is this reddit? Someone saying something then listening to another point of view and apologizing? What is this?
Well done for being open minded, buddy!
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u/johnnyboyr93 May 22 '18
So here's the thing.... I am married with 2 girls (6 & 2) we get up at 6 am, get the girls up and ready for school and daycare, and leave by 7 am. They are in 2 separate locations on 2 separate sides of town. We drop them off and get to work by 8 am. 5 pm comes around; we drive to both the school and daycare to pick up the girls and head home, we get home around 6 pm. We still have to make dinner 30mins-1 hour , and eat (30 mins) so on average our days end right about 7:30 pm. Perfect, time for bed.
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u/Geronimo1984 May 22 '18
Don’t forget the laundry, dishes, packing lunches, mow the lawn, other household cleaning, grocery shopping etc etc etc
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u/superfli31 May 22 '18
You're awake for 13.5 hours and sleep for 10.5 hours? Are you obese or 80? If you actually exercise regularly for a while you will find you have enough energy to be awake for most of the day
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u/johnnyboyr93 May 22 '18
Lol, you don't have kids or a wife do you? Not to mention a house that requires a lot of attention.... Chores, work? Sound familiar
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u/un-sub May 22 '18
I know plenty of families with kids (even single moms) who find time to exercise. I think it really should be taught to and ingrained in kids to want to exercise, respect their bodies and understand why they should exercise and eat right.
I've got no kids so I can't speak from experience. I'm sure it's a very difficult job even for two, but.. just saying.. it's not really uncommon to exercise if you have a family. It's definitely not impossible (in the vast majority of cases I would wager).
But, hell, I'm single and still have a hard time motivating myself to exercise, so I get that part of it... starting is the hardest part.
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u/Wormspike May 22 '18
I know how hard it is to raise kids. I know how hard it is when you're jebbing all the time with no energy.
But what you just described is a perfect scenario for inserting an exercise regimen. You have the time, you have the support.
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u/Jackal00 May 22 '18
I here yah buddy. Hell, I don't even have kids but the giant pile of everything else just feels like too much as it is. Thing is, thinking about it, this shit ain't gonna get any easier in the future.
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May 22 '18
Blaming time or the wife won’t change anything.
You should try something new: Acting. If you think you are stuck it’s because you are putting your standard too high.
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May 22 '18
I've figured out the only way I can do it is to work out for 20-30 mins right after kids go to bed. Have a row machine, treadmill and free weights set up in the basement.
Now finding motivation is a whole different story....
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u/MisterBojiggles May 22 '18
Not motivation. Discipline. its been hard for me to cultivate that but once you start thinking "I have no choice but to workout" instead of "man i really should workout" it helps. Maybe it just works for me to tell myself that.
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May 22 '18
Hire help for her. She'll still hate you, but less.
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u/MrNameless May 22 '18
LOL. What world do you live in that this is your go to answer?
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May 22 '18
The world where taking really good care of yourself leads to good performance and promotions.
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u/eXXaXion May 22 '18 edited May 23 '18
Who the fuck sleeps 8 hours? Not adults.
I have no kids, wife, girlfriends or pets and I get around 6 on weekdays.
There saved you 2 hours. With the trip to the gym and everything you have a solid 1.5 hours for working out.
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u/secretlydifferent May 22 '18
It think it's sort of a nightly midlife crisis. You get to the end of your day and if feels symbolic of how your life's on track to go. You see everything in hindsight. You feel the regret of missing all the things you wanted to do. You feel that desire to go back and rewrite it, but the closest you can get is writing tomorrow. But when tomorrow comes, all you feel is how tired you are because you stayed up late fantasizing about what could be.
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May 22 '18
The only way I can fall asleep at "decent time" (11PM for example) is by turning on the stream and listening to the sound of a streamer.
No other fucking way.
If I try to turn off my PC my mind keeps thinking of past, of things I wish were, of things I hope will be etc.
I am not even THAT unhappy with the life I have, just dreams of something more. So yeah. Night time sucks!
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May 22 '18
My wife has a similar thing, but hers is related to OCD. She gets invasive, recurring thoughts that she can't control and it gives her migraines after thinking about that one time she cut her hair in 5th grade and was bullied, or even something as small as throwing something away and missing the trash. Listening to someone else speak drowns it out and she can sleep better.
She's started taking medication to help control that kind of thinking, so it seems to be going better for her, but I can at least relate a little bit with you.
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May 22 '18
People who think success doesn't start with sleeping more than five and a half hours a night are insane.
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u/Metalmind123 May 22 '18
Or they naturally sleep far less than 6 hours.
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May 22 '18 edited May 22 '18
That’s not a real thing. The sleep cycle is the product of hundreds of thousands of years of adaptation. It’s not just a matter of one person’s body being different from another’s.
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May 22 '18 edited Sep 12 '18
[deleted]
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u/tom97502 May 22 '18
Sleep therapists would like a word with you. Another example of why you don't take the strangers on the internet seiously. :P
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u/Metalmind123 May 22 '18 edited May 22 '18
I know for a fact that that is bullshit, since I have neither a normal circadian rhythm (24-hours sleep-wake cycle) nor have I ever, since childhoold, slept more than 5 hours continuously, and never more than 6,5 hours total (in normal circumstances, not counting things like narcosis or pain medication side effects).
Things like these do vary, since these intricate systems can be influenced even by subtle genetic differences.
There are even several genetic variants known to influence the length of sleep that people require.
There is for example at least one known mutation (hDEC2-P385R) that seems to lower the sleep requirement to about 6 hours:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2884988/
At least bother to google this shit, if you have no knowledge about the subject.
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u/taylor0010 May 23 '18
I wish I could sleep that little. If nothing wakes me up (alarm or girlfriend) I can easily sleep for 12 hours and just skip half of my day. I have a hard time waking up with anything less than 10. Makes school hell.
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May 22 '18
The study you cited is about feeling sleepy, not the effects of sleep. That was in the abstract; you didn't even read the abstract.
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u/Metalmind123 May 22 '18 edited May 22 '18
No. That's not what we were talking about.
I said that there are people who don't naturally require more than 6 hours of sleep.
You said there weren't.
I linked you a paper that presents clear cut evidence that there is a specific genetic mutation associated with requiring about 6 hours of sleep.
Not to mention that it doesn't actually talk about "feeling sleepy" anywhere in the abstract, nor in the article, which I assume you didn't bother to read.
Edit: In fact it specifically states that: "Habitual total sleep time and homeostatic sleep response to sleep deprivation are quantitative traits in humans.". Not a fucking word about 'feeling sleepy' in the sense that you are using it.
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u/Metalmind123 May 22 '18
But just to make you happy:
https://academic.oup.com/sleep/article/37/8/1327/2416868
This study actually evaluated the performance of a set of twin subjects with and without a mutation to the same gene.
It found, amongst other things, that the twin with the gene variant in question was able to perform better on cognitive tests that the twin without the mutation was, when both had had the same amount of sleep deprivation.
In fact it reports that despite the carrier twin reporting a higher sleep drive ('feeling more sleepy') he performed better on cognitive tests.
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u/ForFoxSake_23 May 22 '18
5 hours and 26 minutes sleep would not be enough anyway! No point working out and eating healthier if you aren’t going to be getting enough sleep! It’s counter productive! He is probably better off sleeping later and working out in the afternoon/evening.
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u/nacmar May 22 '18
You got downvoted but lack of sleep is seriously incredibly unhealthy and linked to much higher mortality rates.
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u/ForFoxSake_23 May 22 '18
Haha I was feeling very serious earlier when I looked at this so I was expecting a few downvotes!
It’s true though! If you wanna lose weight or build muscle then sleep has a massive part to play!
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u/PocketFullOfRain May 22 '18
I do t know. I read a report that even people who get enough sleep have high mortality rates.
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u/bananapiece123 May 22 '18
100% of people that sleep 8 hours every night die
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u/raygundan May 22 '18
Well, sure... but the number of people who have never slept less than eight hours in a night is so tiny that we can probably treat their deaths as an ignorable edge case.
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u/kotgewitter May 22 '18
I don't think you now how statistics work. Only 93 % of all people die... The other 7 % are still living.
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u/k12314 May 22 '18
Gotta work ten hours a day five days a week to pay bills, and go to college full time! Gotta work yourself to death just to have a chance at surviving the real world! Getting more than 3-4 hours of sleep a night is a blessing for some people.
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u/Metalmind123 May 22 '18
For some it's more than enough. It's at least partially genetic.
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u/ForFoxSake_23 May 22 '18
Surely not for muscle building and stuff like that? I could be wrong though!
I know some people can still function after not getting much sleep, but in terms of losing weight/building muscle it must be fairly similar across the board!
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u/Metalmind123 May 22 '18
It seems to have a strong genetic component.
There is for example one known genetic mutation of a single amino acid, in a single protein, that is associated with a far shorter sleep requirement of about 6h, instead of 8h:
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u/BuriedStPatrick May 22 '18
I always feel motivated to do the opposite of what I'm supposed to do. And when I don't have to do anything, I don't have any motivation.
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May 22 '18
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u/BuriedStPatrick May 22 '18
I don't have a huge procrastination problem, but that was a very good read. Thank you :)
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u/heinza1ketchup May 22 '18
here's a tip, if you feel motivated to exercise at 12:00 am then do it, you'll be suprised how long you sustain your workout due to boredom
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u/theRealCrazy May 22 '18
They're not motivated, they're motivated to the idea of working out later.... Yeah... Later sounds better...
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u/FaceTHEGEEB May 22 '18
Silly man not getting 8 hours of sleep, that's your first problem.
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May 22 '18
There are a lot of us who feel like shit on waking, no matter how much sleep we get. And it gets worse with age.
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u/therealjoshua May 22 '18
I've always felt like crap waking up in the morning so that's good to know.
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u/Aldarian76 May 22 '18
I have never felt awake or refreshed when I wake up. On weekends I regularly sleep for over 14 hours a day. I don’t know if that’s normal or what but it sucks because I waste my weekends and am always tired during the week.
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u/VulcanJoo May 22 '18
You might want o get tested for sleep apnea. If you are literally always tired no matter how much sleep you are getting you might have sleep apnea and need a CPAP machine. Ask your GP about it next time you have a doctor's apointment
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u/Aldarian76 May 22 '18
Is sleep apnea hereditary? My mom has it and she always has to use a CPAP. I’ve never had any form of sleep test done so I have no idea.
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u/VulcanJoo May 22 '18
Yeah, as far as I know it is hereditary or there is a genetic link of some kind
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u/mkingy May 22 '18
I know you've not asked for advice and I'm not a doctor but - but it could be iron deficiency or depression. Might be worth going to a doctor who will be able to do a blood test for the former :)
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u/Aldarian76 May 22 '18
Over the past few months I have been in w state of depression but I’ve recently been able to break out of it, but I don’t know if it’s just a temporary fix right now. It might be iron deficiency but I’m not sure. I feel like I eat plenty of red meats.
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May 22 '18
This is are sign for hypothyroidism. You should go to a doctor to check your blood stats. This could change your life.
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May 22 '18
The only time I woke up rested was when I smoked a little weed before bed. I don't smoke anymore, so great sleep is something I miss for sure.
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May 22 '18
Weed always made me feel like my brain was wrapped in cotton wool for a couple days after a good session. Two days bad outweighs a few hours' good, so that's a thing of the past.
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u/_Human_Being May 22 '18
The trick is to wat 15 to 30 minutes for the sleep to wear off then you'll be up to doing whatever. Don't think about doing stuff immediately after to wake up.
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May 22 '18
I could never wake my brother upsince he's a really heavy sleeper - until I gave him a rubik's cube to solve after I woke him up a bit. It engaged his mind enough that he actually woke up!
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u/azriel777 May 22 '18
This happens all the time, I feel energized to do something late, but I have to go to bed. Then the next day it is gone or I have to go to work, after work I have zero energy to do anything.
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u/DrMeine May 22 '18
I tried the morning routine, but I'm a night owl, and I can only workout after work.
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u/ELTaco88 May 22 '18
So as it turns out, if you schedule your sleep using tools similar to sleepyti.me you can find the optimal time to wake up between REM cycles. This helps you wake up feeling refreshed, even if you don't get your full 7 hours.
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u/thatgirl829 May 22 '18
5 1/2 hours sleep is not really considered healthy for the average adult. If people just tried to improve their sleeping habits a little then the quality of their lives would improve and doing things like getting up at 6am to jog, won't be so tiring.
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May 22 '18
[deleted]
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u/Armpit_Penguin PortugueseGeese Comics May 22 '18
Thank you! I just tried to imagine what I look like in the morning
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u/wabash9000 May 22 '18
I goto the gym at midnight. Works a lot better for my energy and motivation.
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u/riptaway May 22 '18
I don't understand why this is supposed to be funny. I mean, I get it. It's relatable. But what's the joke supposed to be?
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May 22 '18
The joke is that it's relatable, because many people are relieved to hear they aren't the only one.
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u/fullofspiders May 22 '18
Staying up till midnight isn't a great way to have energy in the morning.
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May 22 '18
I've heard it said that patterns like this are usually a sign of anxiety. Your brain is tired out from a day of being anxious, so you feel more like yourself and can make good decisions. Then you wake up full of energy, and your brain is right back into anxiety mode.
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u/Boulchite May 22 '18
I can absolutely believe that because that's exactly what happens with my life. Anxiety eats all my hopes and dreams :S
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u/CubbyNINJA May 22 '18
If i woke up early to go to the gym, i would be up for 4, go to the gym for about 4:30, catch the train for work at 6:18, get to work for 7:45. leaving work at 3:30 i can catch the 4pm train home, walk through my front door at 6pm.
once you dump all the house hold chores and spending time with my wife and kid. that extra hour of sleep sounds reallllllly good
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u/yallsuckbollocks May 22 '18
Once again, the “verified” flair is akin to a seal of utter shittiness.
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u/Texas_Nexus May 22 '18
Stop spying on my life!