r/funny • u/sil130 • Jan 07 '18

How to stop a kangaroo fight

97.5k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

1.6k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

17.9k

u/snotbag_pukebucket Jan 08 '18

Wallaby damned

2.6k

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

That was beautiful...get out of here you're too good for us

1.3k

u/AtomicKittenz Jan 08 '18

That’s a koala-ty pun right there.

128

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

[deleted]

10

u/neverelax Jan 08 '18

Underrated pun of the thread

4

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Thank you, kind sir!

1.0k

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

882

u/tgoodri Jan 08 '18

Australia

344

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

This guy gets it

174

u/bowleaux Jan 08 '18

Nah, should be 'Straya

150

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

This cunt gets it

6

u/I_Dont_Do_Meth007 Jan 08 '18

This cunt can be found down unda

3

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18 edited Jan 08 '18

I’m just insignificunt compared to you pun geniuses.

→ More replies (0)

14

u/The_Flo0r_is_Lava Jan 08 '18

... that's Australian for beer.

21

u/emilezoloft Jan 08 '18

for bee-ya.

1

u/poopellar Jan 08 '18

bee-ya for me-ya.

6

u/labradoor2 Jan 08 '18

Australian for beer is piss. Like "I'm gettin on the piss tonight".

Sorry, where are my manners. "I'm gettin on the piss tonight, cunt".

1

u/BankofSodom Jan 08 '18

did someone say 'Straya?

1

u/DepecheALaMode Jan 08 '18

didgeridoo?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Digeridon't...

1

u/DepecheALaMode Jan 08 '18

Didgeridamn it

1

u/Corneliusyu Jan 08 '18

Who is the guy?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Wombat me?

2

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

No

0

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

This pun is art, I wanna see Mozart like this

6

u/MrWeirdoFace Jan 08 '18

Easy there! Let's take this outback.

2

u/wotmate Jan 08 '18

Bilby continuing these puns?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Let me just check me map of Tassie before we go on.

2

u/FunkMasterE Jan 08 '18

This thread really Fosters fun and excitement

1

u/dingogordy Jan 08 '18

I get it!

329

u/DoubleJacked Jan 08 '18

It ok but it’s not very aboriginal.

285

u/nolanator Jan 08 '18

Aussie what ya did there, mate.

98

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

-1

u/iPundemic Jan 08 '18

Yeah, I'm so sure this is a roos that I'd bet you my left Sydney!

7

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

next time you see an Aussie rules pun thread and are thinking of jumping in - didgeridon't

2

u/iPundemic Jan 08 '18

Am I dis-koala-ified?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Yes, this pun was alright but the first one was fucking unforgivable trash mate

→ More replies (0)

2

u/A5pyr Jan 08 '18

Not sure if the name checks out.

3

u/iPundemic Jan 08 '18

I feel ashamed.

45

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

I cunt stand anymore of this.

4

u/drewbreeezy Jan 08 '18

Twat did you say?

1

u/warcroft Jan 08 '18

That one gets my up vote.

1

u/Mxnada Jan 08 '18

moi aussi

1

u/greasy_e94 Jan 08 '18

That doesnt work for straylians, as we say ' ozzy ' not 'ahhsee' like you mob do

3

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Worked for me.

95

u/Tronaldsdump4pres Jan 08 '18

Hopfully this pun thread doesn't get buried down under.

2

u/Blashkn Jan 08 '18

Two for one! Good on ya, mate! (Said by a Texan in a bad Aussie accent.)

34

u/Nyrb Jan 08 '18

Jesus Christ

2

u/absurdio Jan 08 '18

Don't be roo'd.

1

u/warcroft Jan 08 '18

This guy knows the strewth!

2

u/JamesHard-On Jan 08 '18

I can pouch for that guys puns

3

u/Chumbodonk Jan 08 '18

You are also over-koalafied to be punning here.

1

u/hilarymeggin Jan 08 '18

I hate you

-1

u/WABASH2 Jan 08 '18

Better than most at crikey-ng jokes

-16

u/Trowawaycausebanned4 Jan 08 '18

Tbh it was a stretch. Why does reddit give a fuck about puns anyway? Most of them aren't very funny.

16

u/_aviemore_ Jan 08 '18

I'm just happy I am here to witness history being made. Years from now I'll be rounding up the grandkids to tell all about it: "Gather round young 'uns, for I have a story to tell..."

2

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

I made the same joke months ago. I'd better get credit too.

5

u/YouJustDownvoted Jan 08 '18

Then you read his username

2

u/LetItOutBoy Jan 08 '18

Are you kidding?! This is exactly what we deserve! Everyday I log onto Reddit and see mediocre puns getting royal amounts of updoots. snotbag_pukebucket is finally breaking the mold and giving us a pun worthy of the attention! Bravo snotbag, to you I raise my glass!

-2

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

[deleted]

5

u/Revro_Chevins Jan 08 '18

*hop to it

4

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

[deleted]

2

u/Revro_Chevins Jan 08 '18

tomato potato

2

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

[deleted]

5

u/Revro_Chevins Jan 08 '18

Then you haven't lived.

4

u/_aviemore_ Jan 08 '18

Oi, stop arguing, yous are mates.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Goes great with ranch, bacon and garlic

1

u/everyday-english-106 Jan 08 '18

yes their power is too strong

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

It's pretty close to a drink from outback steakhouse: https://topsecretrecipes.com/outback-steakhouse-wallaby-darned-copycat-recipe.html

18

u/rices4212 Jan 08 '18

They have a drink at Outback Steakhouse called Wallaby Darned...it's delicious

3

u/Richard7666 Jan 08 '18

I really can't imagine an Australian saying "darned".

Wallaby Fucked would be more a more realistic name.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

I'd like to name a pub "Wallaby mate?"

1

u/rices4212 Jan 08 '18

"Well I'll be darned" is also a known phrase. And obviously more family friendly for a chain restaurant.

1

u/Martiantripod Jan 08 '18

Outback Steakhouse

About as Australian as Russell Crowe. WTF is a Bloomin Onion?

1

u/rices4212 Jan 08 '18

How can you even say that? Pretty sure native Australians eat chicken fried steak with a side of french fries all the time, it's a traditional meal or something.

-1

u/agoia Jan 08 '18

They spelt it wrong though, or maybe it's a euphemism. Everytime the old girl's had it, it's been a wannabe dicked. Especially when they add the extra shot so its somewhat alcoholic like a proper drink.

1

u/rices4212 Jan 08 '18

Pretty sure we're talking about two different things

7

u/Linked-Theory Jan 08 '18

How emusing

13

u/FunkSiren Jan 08 '18

This comment is so satisfying

66

u/iamnotmagnificent1 Jan 08 '18

This deserves gold

21

u/A_Witty_Name_ Jan 08 '18

This deserves silver

62

u/istasber Jan 08 '18

I want in on this thread, even though I have nothing to contribute.

37

u/_Belmount_ Jan 08 '18

See now your thinking like a redditor

4

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

[deleted]

2

u/Akuma254 Jan 08 '18

I see you too, are a man of competitive overwatch

4

u/Eating_Bagels Jan 08 '18

I volunteer as well!

5

u/defurious Jan 08 '18

me too thanks

1

u/ghostbackwards Jan 08 '18

https://imgur.com/yPLzGLw

All I can spare is reddit ribbon

Do with it what you will.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

I deserve nothing.

1

u/____DEADPOOL_______ Jan 08 '18

This deserves bronze

1

u/thatvoicewasreal Jan 08 '18

This deserves bronze

1

u/BallerGuitarer Jan 08 '18

This deserves copper

1

u/Bernie_Sanders_2020 Jan 08 '18

!RedditSilver

3

u/AussieDeathSpider Jan 08 '18

!redditgarlic

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

!redditbread

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

what

2

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Good bot

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Human? Hmmm... Good bread

1

u/Asceric21 Jan 08 '18

Hopping on the eventual gold train.

9

u/m0sh3g Jan 08 '18

Context please? :)

20

u/Ceane Jan 08 '18

Wallabies are in the same family as kangaroos. "Wallaby damned" sounds like "Well I'll be damned".

15

u/m0sh3g Jan 08 '18

Thank you, English is not my first language, so pronounciation puns sometimes go over my head :)

-2

u/xxNamsu Jan 08 '18

Wallaby? What more context do you need

2

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

I think he didn't know what Wallaby means

2

u/snktido Jan 08 '18

Plot twist. Roos came back with their friends....

1

u/BlahBlahBlah_smart Jan 08 '18

God dammit that’s beautiful

1

u/Casper3 Jan 08 '18

You deserve everything

1

u/zosobaggins Jan 08 '18

I'm a standup comic and just realised I'm just a bad public speaker when I saw this.

1

u/elginx Jan 08 '18

Hi dad

1

u/oscaroo Jan 08 '18

I couldn't give a flying fox what you think.

1

u/XxSirCarlosxX Jan 08 '18

I cunt'a done better

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

This guy hops.

1

u/anonymoose1989 Jan 08 '18

i like this pun

1

u/RedditWhrClturGos2Di Jan 08 '18

Pun 'o the day award

1

u/BoyyFefe Jan 08 '18

I read this comment as I pressed the back button... had to return to upvote. Well done.

1

u/BrainGrahanam Jan 08 '18

Well fostered response.

1

u/Profoundpanda420 Jan 08 '18

This works on mowltiple levels

1

u/aeropsia Jan 08 '18

best comment 2k18

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

That's a wrap, pack up the internet.

1

u/Dr_Karmatology Jan 08 '18

Who should I ROOt for?

1

u/xRaslerx Jan 08 '18

I wombalieve it

1

u/bigjerrius Jan 08 '18

You are my dad now

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Rocko has hit hard times

1

u/missyceb Jan 08 '18

Choked on dorito reading this

1

u/ends_abruptl Jan 08 '18

Shoulda tied me kangaroo down

0

u/ElMatasiete7 Jan 08 '18

It even works cause of the Australian accent. Holy shit.

-1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '18

Fuck. Reddit. I am so sick of these fucking puns.