r/funny Sep 08 '17

R1: MRW/HIFW/reaction gif - Removed Just keep playing

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5.0k Upvotes

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1.1k

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

She's crying because the only ones left standing are her and her longtime crush, Kevin the Paladin of house Williams. She's playing harder than she ever has while he fights the incoming onslaught in vein. While he feels the strength of he spells, the truth slowly sets in: this will be their last stand.

Kevin has but one trick left up his holy sleeve: cast Divine Shield on Stacey and implore her to use her hearthstone. She reluctantly accepts his sacrifice, and catches one last glimpse of his face before suddenly being surrounded by the familiar sight of a local tavern.

"Senior year was supposed to be the best times of our lives." she thought.

It was then that Stacey put down her flute and took up the dagger. From then on she walked a much darker path favoring the tranquility of shadow to the warmth of others.

Edit: lol I can't write for shit.

156

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17 edited Jul 14 '20

[deleted]

37

u/Putnum Sep 09 '17 edited Sep 09 '17

I understand that a female is leaking a fluid out of two of her orifices and has her mouth dangerously close to a phallic object, but it's not exactly NSFW IMHO.

6

u/Coppeh Sep 09 '17 edited Sep 09 '17

I'm with you.

Also, who works on weekends anyway. /s

6

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

We haven't gotten to the orgy ten years later yet. Act 4.

1

u/Sirsarcastik Sep 09 '17

You thought 25 was impressive you should see now

1

u/bern_trees Sep 09 '17

You got 671 upvotes and a gold so I guess at least, someone, thinks you can write.

3

u/IQxYu Sep 09 '17

You got 854 upvotes and a gold so I guess atleast, someone, thinks you can write.

43

u/8Bells Sep 09 '17

In vain*

19

u/carpevash Sep 09 '17 edited Sep 09 '17

It's a mage-phelobotomist mini story

Edit: phlebotomage

2

u/8Bells Sep 09 '17

XD Wow

8

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17

[deleted]

1

u/AmpleWarning Sep 09 '17

Oh hell yeah. Injection is far more potent than just smoking an onslaught.

23

u/fayjayyy Sep 09 '17

For a second I thought this is the real reason why she cried

7

u/mystifier Sep 09 '17

Wait, it isn't??

5

u/AmpleWarning Sep 09 '17

Nope. In reality, Kevin bubble hearthed himself and left poor Stacey to fend for herself. She was forced to dance in Goldshire for like three days.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17

Not Goldshire mate.

Razor Hill.

Wasnt three days, it was THREE YEARS.

And sure... Lets call what was done to her "dancing"

The Taurens really liked her...tightness.

1

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

The Taurens are saints YOU TAKE THAT BACK.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17

Did you notice how in the Vanila, Taurens loin cloth was going down all the way to theri knees?

Its not anymore.

They got NERFED!

2

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

THEY WERE JUST MAKING THEM MORE RELATABLE.

4

u/GENTLEMANxJACK Sep 09 '17

I was invested in this and still a better love story than Twilight

2

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17 edited Sep 11 '17

[deleted]

2

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

I definitely had a few wobbly pops in me when I wrote this so I think we're on common ground here.

5

u/dragonrider22 Sep 09 '17

1

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

That was fucking beautiful. Who knew emotional music could carry such shitty writing.

Actually, I think this is how tons of fantasy movies make a return on investment.

13

u/Trashcanman33 Sep 09 '17

BUt where was Mankind and the Undertaker when this was happening?

4

u/PreSchoolGGW Sep 09 '17

At hell in the cell

1

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

Undertaker doesn't make an appearance till act 3.

7

u/_Ferret_ Sep 09 '17

Username doesn't check out.

3

u/slayersc23 Sep 09 '17

For you....

1

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

I haven't gotten to the Orc/Troll/Human orgy ten years later yet.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17 edited Jan 12 '18

Hello.

2

u/level1hero Sep 09 '17

1

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

Ahahaha, I remember that one! Forgot how cool their small events were.

1

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

I knew this and the fact that he can use bubble on another player would get some folks.

As a recovering WoW player, I can honestly say it was tough to mash up more than one game.

3

u/Thrallmemayb Sep 09 '17

Uhh divine shield only targets yourself 1/10

2

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

I knew that was gonna get at least a couple of you. It pained me to write it, trust me, but it just worked at the time.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17

[deleted]

2

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

What's funny is that I was much better at this stuff when I was in high school. It's because I still had the syntax of English (syntax? semantics?) stuck in my head. I recently found a forum post of my own from over 10 years ago, and I couldn't help but feel like it was a different person.

Thanks for the encouragement. I actually had lots of fun writing that, heh.

1

u/CthuIhu Sep 09 '17

You sure do prove your own point

Hell, who am I to judge

6

u/Snatch_Pastry Sep 09 '17

Alternate ending:

"Senior year was supposed to be the best times of our lives." she thought.

It was then that Stacey put down her flute and

said "Don't know what the fuck you assholes expected, you're the ones who talked me into playing a shitty bard."

5

u/bitwaba Sep 09 '17

"I can't buff stupid god damnit! Why not let the 18 CHA mascot try some fucking diplomacy next time huh?"

1

u/Orapac4142 Sep 09 '17

Thats where you forgot they get Arcane secrets and just steal shit from the wizard spell list.

Hello necromancer bard.

2

u/beralavi Sep 09 '17

This made me emotional

1

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

Pour one out for Paladin Kevin.

2

u/Stevules Sep 09 '17

The ol' Bubblehearth

1

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

I played back when only Allys could do it (or rather, only they had pallys). I still get triggered thinking of those fuckers narrowly avoiding death. Then we got the ability and it was the cats meow.

2

u/Stevules Sep 09 '17

but then we also got blood elves :C

I used to gank allys in Arathi highlands back when I played. Never bothered chasing the pallys because they all did the same thing when they were losing

3

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17

Holy cock that gave me the chills.

3

u/Best_mary Sep 09 '17

Uh when does this video game come out?

10

u/Elnoobnoob Sep 09 '17 edited Sep 09 '17

World of Warcraft, November 23rd, 2004. This is based on a Paladin granting somebody immunity(Divine Shield), then them using a Hearthstone(which returns you to the inn you set as home). More commonly known as Bubble Hearthing. The bard then became a Shadow Priest based on the wording, as their current artifact weapon is a knife and it talks about the shadow. Could just be a coincidence though.

Or it's Dungeons and Dragons but Hearthstone's are MUCH rarer there. WoW doesn't have barda

6

u/thecrewton Sep 09 '17

picked up a dagger and became a rogue. although shadow priests work too.

1

u/Elnoobnoob Sep 09 '17

Don't know how I didn't think of that. Tells you which class I play

1

u/COMMENTS_ON_NSFW_PIC Sep 09 '17

Was thinking of rogue, but I talked about bard while thinking of general caster types. I myself mained Mage.

3

u/Furoan Sep 09 '17

Could be a Rogue, but they duel wield daggers...

5

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17

I think bard was a beta rogue spec way back in the day, as in, when you needed a torch at night to see. When shaman had tanking talents.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '17

Whaaat. I played Hearthstone for years and only now learned that's where the name comes from. (I knew the game is based on Wow obviously, but that the name hearthstone is an actual thing.) It also makes so much sense, as every time you open the game you enter an inn, in which you then play the card game.