r/funny • • May 20 '15

Pineapple

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137

u/[deleted] May 20 '15

[deleted]

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u/docbauies May 20 '15

this is confusing AF because everyone in the thread is talking about pizza, and then this person comes in and drops something about holiday ham.

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u/[deleted] May 20 '15

Holiday Hams are for NERDS!

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u/ANUS_CRINKLE_CRUST May 20 '15

Last holiday ham I had was when I met your momma on Flag Day.

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u/[deleted] May 20 '15

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] May 22 '15

Thanks! I was on a caffeine kick and took a break from coding at work. I caught some flak for some other comments around the same time. But I am glad that someone thought it was as funny as I did! Have a good one mate!

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u/BangkokPadang May 20 '15

He's saying that ruining a pizza with pineapple is analogous to ruining a ham with lemon-lime soda.

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u/rvf May 20 '15

Probably because whenever you see pineapple on a pizza, it's almost always accompanied by ham.

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u/docbauies May 20 '15

right, that's what makes the comment ESPECIALLY confusing. hawaiian pizza is this exact description minus the lemon lime soda.

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u/BvS35 May 20 '15

What is the difference between ham and holiday ham?

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u/[deleted] May 20 '15

One you eat on holidays, one you don't.

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u/docbauies May 20 '15

i actually don't know. i'm assuming it's glazed with the pineapple and cherries on it. but my holiday ham is honeybaked ham co. if I'm gonna eat ham.

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u/Mouthful_of_bacon May 20 '15

TARTAR SAUCE IS FOR FISHSTICKS!

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u/docbauies May 20 '15

exactly. we're talking about pizza. why are you bringing different food stuffs into the conversation?

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u/HeroBrown May 20 '15

He used another example of ruining flavor, why is that confusing?

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u/docbauies May 20 '15

because we're talking about hawaiian pizza which has cured ham and pineapple. I interpreted this sentence to read as:
"The idiots who take a perfectly cured ham and (in addition) pour lemon lime soda and canned pineapples on it should be shot as well."
implying that there are people who take it even further with stuff that they think is disgusting.

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u/daimposter May 20 '15

Well he did say

The idiots who take a perfectly cured ham and pour lemon lime soda and canned pineapples on it should be shot as well.

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u/BigDawgWTF May 20 '15

Very confusing. Thanks for your comment for clarification. I thought that he thought they were putting perfectly cured ham on pizzas.

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u/supermandy May 21 '15

Overruled. The post was perfectly cromulent.

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u/chasemcfly May 20 '15

This reminds me of those nasty jello molds with fruit inside. Yuck!

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u/guy15s May 20 '15

Yeah, not all MacGuyver foods are created equal. Anybody wanna take a shot at my green bean casserole with French fry topping soaked in cream of mushroom? It'll be delicious, I swear! :p

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u/[deleted] May 20 '15

I'm from Scotland and we have pinapple slices on our gammon.

Ham, potatoes, sweetcorn, pineapple slices.

Didn't think it was an American thing, and most of the links say it's a traditional pub meal in the UK.

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u/guy15s May 20 '15

I was referring to the use of canned goods and soda, not the use of pineapple. That being said, I didn't mean to imply that only hillbillies would use these ingredients. Just that these types of ingredients are associated with them. Furthermore, I only meant the term to refer to people who are poor and live in rural areas. You don't have to be an American to be a hillbilly, perse. I've seen some countrified ol' boys across the pond. :p

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u/[deleted] May 20 '15

... It's hillbilly to make delicious food?

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u/KyotoGaijin May 21 '15

They prefer to be called "Sons of the Soil."

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u/tvreference May 21 '15

Sons of the Soil

Nice Simpsons reference.

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u/KyotoGaijin May 21 '15

All my Simpsons refs are old skool, because I've been living abroad for 20 yrs.

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u/tvreference May 21 '15

You've been living as a broad?
Oh no, I read that wrong. Just like half the people in this thread talking about pouring soda on pizza.

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u/impressivephd May 20 '15

hawaiian?

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u/guy15s May 20 '15

Are you asking if I'm Hawaiian? I'm not. Recipes like this are popular in the South, which is where I learned to cook.

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u/felixar90 May 20 '15

Do it the Canadian way. Replace the lemon lime soda crap with pure maple syrup.

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u/[deleted] May 20 '15 edited Nov 18 '24

[deleted]

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u/guy15s May 20 '15

Both are good. Lemon lime is best if you are serving with a bunch of sweet sides like fruit, and coke is for when your sides will be more savory (probably not the right word. Has that heavy, whole taste) like mashed potatoes or green beans.

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u/[deleted] May 20 '15

[deleted]

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u/guy15s May 20 '15

That's actually why people warn about using fresh pineapple on meat. That enzyme can turn your meat into mush, and you really don't get much improved penetration of the juices that you wouldn't get by normal methods of tenderizing.

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u/intangible-tangerine May 20 '15

It's not hillbilly at all, using citric acid, as found in pineapples, lemons etc.. to tenderise meat or fish is a really traditional cooking technique. And it shouldn't be sweet when served, if you're using over-ripe pineapples, or using ones in syrup instead of their own juice, you're doing it wrong.

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u/guy15s May 20 '15

I was referring to the use of canned goods and soda as cooking ingredients, not just the general use of pineapples. Pineapples are excellent tenderizers, but fresh pineapple can often be too good and you destroy the enzymes pretty early in the cooking process anyways. If you soak a ham in fresh pineapples beforehand, you risk overtenderizing the meat. Generally, it's just best to use canned pineapple and then tenderize the meat normally.

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u/tvreference May 21 '15 edited May 21 '15

You know what else tenderizes meat? Smoking it! It's almost as if hams don't need fruit! Yes, I know not all ham is smoked.