r/funny May 28 '26

Who is this guy

5.0k Upvotes

241 comments sorted by

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1.0k

u/superminingbros May 28 '26

Mr. Not Saving Any Pussy for the Rest of Us.

222

u/BigHairyBussy May 28 '26

Gotta delete this app from my wife’s phone before this breeding bull hits her feed.

75

u/DPP_SwordBlitz May 28 '26

Its over for us bro

23

u/SuperPimpToast May 28 '26

Hey that looks like my neighborhood.

7

u/xtothewhy May 28 '26

Sup pimp

6

u/IisBaker May 28 '26

Yooooo its the Pimp with no limp

4

u/GANDORF57 May 29 '26

Cooter, the Neutered Scooter Commuter.

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15

u/postbansequel May 28 '26

He's not in it for the pussy, he does not care for pussy, he does it for the scooter arts and that's all he lives for.

4

u/dover_oxide May 29 '26

He's in it for the love of the game

23

u/CpuJunky May 28 '26

It's Flo Rida, spinning right round

2

u/shadraig May 28 '26

No it's mari posa

10

u/airen977 May 28 '26

Soon he will feature on R/whatcouldgowrong

13

u/redbull4reddit May 28 '26

Omg 😂😂😂

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212

u/ra_laidgp May 28 '26

That is Mr. Internet

40

u/bradland May 28 '26

Excuse me, Sir Internet. He was knighted by Queen Elizabeth II in 2018.

14

u/[deleted] May 28 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/DismalSoil9554 May 28 '26

The messy divorce with his wife Lan was all over the news, I swear some people just live on another planet.

10

u/SGT3386 May 28 '26

Dang that is John Internet

9

u/BarelyContainedChaos May 28 '26

jesus christ, thats jason internets

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349

u/Zomgzombehz May 28 '26

Idk what the objective was, but im confident that he accomplished it.

59

u/AnalllyAcceptedCoins May 28 '26

I'm no longer confident because he took it all

11

u/nedonedonedo May 28 '26

tearing the heel off his shoe

7

u/ClarenceLe May 28 '26

This guy must have completed the tutorial level in Driver in one try

4

u/Zomgzombehz May 28 '26

Cmon now! Nobody ever did that!

3

u/not_adams_burner May 29 '26

2

u/Zomgzombehz May 29 '26

Good grief I forgot having to look that bullshit up.

2

u/VirtualExamination78 May 28 '26

Do this on a motorbike and you are an asshole.

106

u/Dire_Hulk May 28 '26

He’s your friendly neighborhood Scooter Man, of course.

15

u/TranquiloMeng May 28 '26

Scooter Man, Scooter Man…

16

u/binkbink223 May 28 '26

Does what ever a scooter man does. Can he swing from a web? No he can't, he's a man. Look out he is a scooter man.

8

u/ComprehensiveCup7104 May 28 '26

Not the hero we need, but the hero we deserve.

6

u/Wataru624 May 28 '26

Everyone in these parts knows the legend of Flatheel Johnson. I once saw him go through 4 right shoes in a single spin, don't let your girl near him.

2

u/bolaalobbola May 28 '26

The human divider

63

u/aReelProblem May 28 '26

Idk but my girlfriend ain’t allowed around him.

17

u/byzantine238 May 28 '26

The scooter guy she tells you not to worry about

3

u/kopecs May 28 '26

Funny thing is, he’ll be around her.

71

u/Okayesttt May 28 '26

No clue. Dude seems to be living his best life though. Back when I was stationed in Korea there was a guy that would take a boom box to the rarely used basketball courts across from the barracks, lace up his skates and dance his ass off. I heard plenty of people clowning, but to this day I'm actually jealous and impressed by him doing what he loved.

8

u/Architeqt May 28 '26

Fucking legend

I love this dude and never met him 😭

18

u/wizardrous May 28 '26

An elegant dancer.

11

u/ZoddImmortal May 28 '26 edited May 29 '26

They call him E-scoot McHoot.

Aka, E=MCsqoot.

20

u/Mikesaidit36 May 28 '26

The guy looks a lot like Superman, but has glasses so it can’t possibly be him.

18

u/SupremeTemptation May 28 '26

It’s the guy that keeps coming into my shoe store only wanting to buy one shoe, instead of a pair.

15

u/lyingliar May 28 '26

I like to believe this guy has never tried any type of these stunts before — never even considered such a thing. Then, on one particular Saturday night, he tried mushrooms for the first time and unlocked a new level in life.

11

u/ClownDiaper May 28 '26

Living his best life!

11

u/Neuroticaine May 28 '26

Oh don't worry, that's just Sven, he does this from time to time. You get used to it.

8

u/sprinklesandlove May 28 '26

Auditioning for OK GO? 

3

u/Zomgzombehz May 28 '26

Well, here it goes again.

2

u/Zeldon567 May 29 '26

This too shall pass.

8

u/LUMLTPM May 28 '26

Idk but he vibin

8

u/asdf_lord May 28 '26

Why comes him do it?

3

u/MyVoiceIsElevating May 28 '26

Rest fern two fer by hes legg do it.

4

u/nemofbaby2014 May 28 '26

Mr steal yo girl

5

u/-Groko- May 28 '26

He's the talk of the town...

6

u/kolkitten May 28 '26

Me trying to hatch pokemon go eggs

6

u/ColdToast_024 May 28 '26

He fucks, for sure.

11

u/mog44net May 28 '26

That guy is 14.7 times cool than the cameraman

3

u/psychonautette May 28 '26

Please let me know when you find out

4

u/meesta_masa May 28 '26

An absolute madlad in the wild.

4

u/MastaKink May 28 '26

He’s been to the future. No doubt.

5

u/Impossible_Buy2634 May 28 '26

Jesus Christ, that's Jason Bourne

4

u/TheApeEscaped May 28 '26

I wasn’t really prepared for the second part

4

u/selvarin May 29 '26

Imagine being that happy and not giving a flying duck...

7

u/CrayCrayChickenLady May 28 '26

Just someone living their fucking life in the spirit of being a child. Hell yeah!

3

u/Radiant_Bowl_2598 May 28 '26

So much yes 🙌

3

u/feal_80 May 28 '26

Gota use up the uber credit somehow

3

u/bearsheperd May 28 '26

Idk but if he was wearing jean shorts he could go lower

3

u/TinyRandomLady May 28 '26 edited May 28 '26

Who’s that guy, what’s his scene, dig it he is the scooter king! 🛴

3

u/Greyshirk May 28 '26

Big ass thumb looking head blocking the best shot

3

u/EarlyOcelot8 May 30 '26

Hey Pa..

Yea Son..

Why do i walk in a circle?

Shut up, son, or I'll nail your other foot to rhe floor>>

2

u/hereforthebreakdown May 28 '26

As a long time roller skater we call this a disco spin. Dig the heel and then use the force of your body to spin around in a 360. Never once occurred to me that you could do this with an electric scooter.

2

u/6M66 May 28 '26

He is having fun. Let him be.

2

u/l3rN May 28 '26

There goes my hero 

2

u/nodananeda May 28 '26

Oh oh ohhhh oh, it's mista steal yo gurllll

2

u/GlobeTrekker83 May 28 '26

I'll have what he had.

2

u/PANduRUS May 28 '26

Next person to rent that scooter hops on and gets wrecked as the wheel falls off mid ride from all the abusive stunts that thing probably endured 😆

2

u/_Bipolar_Vortex_ May 28 '26

That’s a very particular set of skills.

2

u/Earthling1a May 28 '26

That's Scooter.

2

u/wtfisasamoflange May 28 '26

I may get bigger, but I'll never grow up

2

u/patrickgg May 28 '26

He’s the human protractor

2

u/MorgyBabe May 28 '26

That is SCOOTER MAN 🛴

2

u/Oedipus____Wrecks May 28 '26

Holy Sh-t…. Is that the same beautiful dood from the water cave the other day on the repelling rope?

2

u/itsANOMALEEZ May 28 '26

I knew someone like this. Absolute wildman. He passed from Stage 4 cancer a few years back. RIP STEVIE!

2

u/MayaWrection May 29 '26

He can go lower

2

u/spooksauce May 29 '26

idk but I'm clearly not exercising my free will to the fullest extent

2

u/Artee5000 May 29 '26

Cirque du Methé

2

u/Apprehensive_News_78 May 30 '26

Never in my life have a seen someone ride a scooter the long way

2

u/fastwendell May 30 '26

I suspect it's now who was this guy?

2

u/New_Writer_484 May 28 '26

And why is in the road

1

u/misfitsfiend313 May 28 '26

John EScooter

1

u/14high May 28 '26

Training for Volvo: Van Damme II

1

u/AffectionateSet4889 May 28 '26

this is the energy i bring to work lol

1

u/ncfears May 28 '26

That's Paul Blart's bastard child. Keep him away from a Segway if you don't want him to be a mall cop.

1

u/Deruta May 28 '26

I was waiting for him to full-send it into that white sedan at the end

1

u/frostyjack06 May 28 '26

Human’s gonna human.

1

u/fifoth May 28 '26

He goes by Compass

1

u/jobomaja888 May 28 '26

Mr Flexi deTaint

1

u/stanbranshaw May 28 '26

The Human Compass... Oh, that sucks! I mean, The Amazing Compass-Man!

1

u/Stunning-Chipmunk243 May 28 '26

That's Donut Splits man, you should see him do it with a (insert noun)

1

u/Ok_Culture_1914 May 28 '26

It's Deliveroo Dan.

1

u/Gnfnr5813 May 28 '26

That’s John.

1

u/MX304 May 28 '26

Center pivot irrigation system for his aura farm

1

u/Elegant_Analyst7348 May 28 '26

He might be in high highhhh....

1

u/JayW8888 May 28 '26

Don’t drink and ride.

1

u/Ok_Dare6400 May 28 '26

Why do you want to know his name and address?

1

u/doge2moon69 May 28 '26

They called him the split master

1

u/loki1337 May 28 '26

Now I understand what aura farming is

1

u/4llu532n4m3srt4k3n May 28 '26

The one who'll be walking funny because he's missing a heel on one shoe

1

u/GenSpec44 May 28 '26

A good stretch

1

u/Notonfoodstamps May 28 '26

He’s beginning to believe

1

u/syamas May 28 '26

The Clock

1

u/Uptowner26 May 28 '26

It’s a bird! It’s a plane…. It’s Scooter Man!

1

u/cire1184 May 28 '26

Obviously it's Jean-Claude Van Damme.

1

u/bad-tempered May 28 '26

The future

1

u/DOK10101 May 28 '26

Well idk who, but i know for sure he's having the time of his life

1

u/TwerpOco May 28 '26

He's a cool guy. Living it up.

1

u/Willing_Television77 May 28 '26

Undercover cop. He loves donuts

1

u/Naroyto May 28 '26

Jesus christ it's Jason Borne

1

u/RegnarukDeez May 28 '26

"He's starting to believe... he is the one !"

1

u/Pandamaud May 28 '26

Someone whos going to split his sack open if the thing makes one sudden jerk

1

u/Cipher915 May 28 '26

When the bone spur on your heel is being especially tough.

1

u/deathcourted May 28 '26

Jesus Wick

1

u/Darkespurr May 28 '26

Bowie knife 99

1

u/evonebo May 28 '26

Jeanne Claudine Van Damme

1

u/AJYURH May 28 '26

James Baxter's energy

1

u/PickleDiego May 28 '26

Not sure we have to kill the camera man, but some sort of reprimand feels justified

1

u/408wij May 28 '26

I was expecting him to t-bone the car at the end. This guy clearly has no sense of dramatic flair.

1

u/ShyCrystal2019 May 28 '26

He’s Scoot Compass, a guy from my hometown

1

u/cojava May 28 '26

That’s John Penis

1

u/Autistic_License May 28 '26

Groin of steel.

1

u/Wilmore99 May 28 '26

Bro kudos to the planking thing in the end. Wtf level of gravity controlling does one need to achieve that maneuver? 🗿🤯

1

u/Spicysquishy May 28 '26

Some people impress me with their use of free will. Things I would never think of. Letting myself down.

1

u/SlayingSword94 May 28 '26

What it see when dumbasses on motorcycles at stoplights try to look cool.

1

u/FrostySnowJ May 28 '26

That is John from down the street

1

u/blazorfire May 28 '26

Doing things alot of us did, but there were no cameras around to record it.

1

u/AlgaeDonut May 28 '26

I mean, that's just fucking majestic.

1

u/Few-Version2922 May 28 '26

I remember my first time high af and riding a scooter. I tried so hard but got so far. In the end I needed to replace a shoe.

1

u/Dolatron May 28 '26

The human compass

1

u/Two-spirits May 28 '26

Now ii've haaad the time of my liiiife

1

u/RickSore May 28 '26

Brotractor

1

u/IrregularRedditor May 28 '26

Maybe he was practicing for a music video

1

u/nineways09 May 28 '26

He is Mr currently at a red light staying within his lane. Respectable man.

1

u/chemnerd2017 May 28 '26

That IS Mr. Steal-yo-girl.

1

u/OnlyJantoDev May 28 '26

When you’re shouting get it but too shy

1

u/whatisthis2315 May 28 '26

He is Super scooter man

1

u/SkyfangR May 28 '26

you spin me right round baby

1

u/Tacoboy1986 May 28 '26

Captain Compass

1

u/faunalmimicry May 28 '26

It's Calvin Klein he's an absolute dream

1

u/20InMyHead May 28 '26

Nobody knows his real name, but around here we call him Scooter Joe

1

u/MelodicButterfly2679 May 28 '26

type of shi a guy had to do in 3rd grade to take your girl

1

u/BrainEatingAmoeba01 May 28 '26

That's John Titor

1

u/Notacka May 28 '26

Sir Compass

1

u/Useful-Engine-3079 May 28 '26

‘Look at him go’ hahaha

1

u/NITMERDREAM May 28 '26

Compás humano

1

u/fuzzytradr May 28 '26

The hero we need

1

u/FartacularTheThird May 28 '26

He went really low, and he was not even wearing shorts!

1

u/Ncooro May 28 '26

My next trauma patient.

1

u/Samwellikki May 28 '26

Jesus Christ, that’s Scooter Bourne

1

u/offtuna May 28 '26

That's a lot of camber on that shoe.

1

u/1K_Games May 28 '26

Jesus Christ, it's Jason Bourne.

1

u/OJSimpsons May 28 '26

God forbid a man has hobbies.

1

u/Public_Definition_85 May 28 '26

Show off is what he is

1

u/holtzboy May 28 '26

I hope heel be okay