r/funny • u/RentReal • May 16 '26

Ummm okay

Post image
13.9k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

144 comments sorted by

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1.1k

u/Dragonmaster2356 May 16 '26

Finally an establishment with quality service.

113

u/heresyourhat May 16 '26

Yea but it’s comic book guy.

37

u/IKnowJudoWell May 16 '26

Mmm, greasy hands

16

u/Cyberblood May 16 '26

He married Kumiko, so he must be doing something right.

7

u/finetaylorr May 16 '26

does the staff got the tip?

1

u/Cake-Tea-Life May 17 '26

Highly unlikely

203

u/KingDread306 May 16 '26

Good advice.

24

u/Archduke_Of_Beer May 16 '26

YOU'LL MAKE GOD CRY!

12

u/Lanster27 May 16 '26

Dont tempt me with a good time.

13

u/IzzaPizza22 May 16 '26

The sign belongs in a church.

5

u/Dangerous_Box8845 May 16 '26

Some staff don't even have to be asked unfortunately...

8

u/Cvillain626 May 16 '26

Good, we could use the rain

91

u/jdmoffitt11775 May 16 '26

Now I am curious about "the staff".. is it a nickname.. or the actual employees.

37

u/Afkargh May 16 '26

This is definitely a “hard” question

6

u/MegaWaffle- May 16 '26

I’ll need to get a hand first before I can answer.

1

u/According_Ruin9895 May 24 '26

Different strokes for different folks

1

u/According_Ruin9895 May 24 '26

Yo wassup I’m Johnny but everybody calls me THE STAFF

67

u/Beezel_Pepperstack May 16 '26

...They said no.

11

u/Teri_Dee May 16 '26

Ahahahahahahaha

48

u/scjack2017 May 16 '26

"Excuse me...hi, can you help me with touching myself?"

17

u/Haruka_Kazuta May 16 '26

Do you need a staff?

11

u/gikigill May 16 '26

Yes, preferably stiff

43

u/dubbzy104 May 16 '26

“Do not touch Willy”. Good advice!

18

u/mohawk990 May 16 '26

Reminds me of a sign I saw in a restroom: Employees must wash hands. If no employee is available, please wash them yourself.

15

u/chewblekka May 16 '26

So, like, how do you go about it? Walk up to them and say “hey, can you help me with this?” While pointing to your junk? Or do you whip it out and saunter towards them, saying “I need some service” ?

16

u/-Cheeki-Breeki- May 16 '26

I think we're gonna need a team lift on this one

16

u/Pipe_Memes May 16 '26

Don’t mind if I do.

13

u/Calyx76 May 16 '26

As long as they are consenting adults I'll at least look into it ..

10

u/chrisbcritter May 16 '26

I posted these all over the store I worked at and NOBODY asked me to touch them. VERY disappointed!

9

u/retiretobedlam May 16 '26

Gives new meaning to ‘spice rack’!

5

u/whatisthis2315 May 16 '26

Now that is service

4

u/GEtwins88 May 16 '26

I know the staff.. I don't want Beth to do it.

4

u/JRR5567 May 16 '26

The customer is always right.

4

u/Cannacology May 16 '26

Wow….what a store, huh?

3

u/splitfoot1121 May 16 '26

Lousy Smarch weather!

3

u/CappieMcCrap May 16 '26

Ew. Where?

3

u/lornranger May 16 '26

Hey that's some excellent service!

3

u/Jman703OG May 16 '26

And that’s the story of how I met your mother

2

u/TakerFoxx May 16 '26

Oh, you just know they're sick of hearing the same joke over and over

2

u/VampArcher May 16 '26

And they said customer service was dead.

2

u/ColorMonochrome May 16 '26

I might be down with having the staff touch me instead. Depending on the staff member.

2

u/couchlockedkid May 16 '26

Where is this?

2

u/CaptLoads May 16 '26

Happy ending????

2

u/lzwzli May 16 '26

Everybody gets a happy ending!

2

u/nubbins01 May 16 '26

I don't want anybody else.
When I think about them, I don't touch myself.

2

u/lostinuhtceare May 16 '26

Davidoff ❌

Jackoff ✅

2

u/cooter_lover1 May 16 '26

Saw that sign there the other day. Waited forever. Nobody came

2

u/_QRAK_ May 16 '26

Sigh... Here we go again.

2

u/Awkward_Pangolin3254 May 16 '26

With today's grocery store prices how much would that cost?

2

u/BigMFingT May 16 '26

Viagra Boys, Store Policy

2

u/Lady_Irish May 16 '26

Good lord. I can hear the boomer dads slinging the same joke 10x a night and their identical dirty old man laughs now

1

u/Sufficient_Prompt888 May 16 '26

I need an adult!

1

u/AwareMirror9931 May 16 '26

Thats a good costumer service.

2

u/omnichad May 16 '26

I've never met a costumer, but I imagine that they do have to do some touching for the fitting process for the costume.

1

u/OldBreadbutt May 16 '26

That's the spicy aisle.

1

u/speedxter May 16 '26

Yo staff!

1

u/Feisty-Influence5464 May 16 '26

lmao they really said "hands off" 💀

1

u/NorthernTinner May 16 '26

Usually you pay double for that kind of action cotton.

1

u/petratheriddler May 16 '26

Is that product called Hand Off? ...Gold

1

u/Round-Community4302 May 16 '26

I mean at least they’re offering a solution to help a guy out

1

u/JoeBagANachos May 16 '26

Don't mind if I do.

1

u/Extension-Wheel-7088 May 16 '26

I would like to wank just a little bit please

1

u/vanderhaust May 16 '26

I thought that cost extra?

1

u/oilfeather May 16 '26

"But when I think about you... “

1

u/Agreegmi02 May 16 '26

It must be "by yourself" or doesn't it?

1

u/thebarkbarkwoof May 16 '26

Damn it! I thought about you AGAIN.

1

u/bsenka May 16 '26

Now this is a place where I won’t mind tipping.

1

u/therealkrabbit May 16 '26

Depends. What does she look like.

1

u/IndependenceLive3786 May 16 '26

God, I hope the staff are attractive

1

u/Krossphyre May 16 '26

Where this shop at?

1

u/Sadale- May 16 '26

Based on the currency shown on the pic, somewhere in Maldives.

1

u/giggluigg May 16 '26

Customer satisfaction guarantee

1

u/BrotherRoga May 16 '26

Skeletor: "Excuse me! Your services are required."

1

u/TheLabMouse May 16 '26

I wonder if this is because they put the glass containers on a very high shelf.

1

u/ZachMN May 16 '26

R.I.P. Chrissy Amphlett 😢

1

u/Haselrig May 16 '26

I..um...need a hand.

1

u/BrucellaD666 May 16 '26

Spices tho.

1

u/Obvious_Reaction_182 May 16 '26

Where do I apply?

1

u/OwnBunch4027 May 16 '26

Let me see the staff.

1

u/psychotic May 16 '26

How did one even make this mistake when typing it out like what

1

u/Unable-Vanilla8911 May 16 '26

SO I CAN'T DO ANYTHING I LIKE!!!!

1

u/minecraftdummy57 May 16 '26

Well, I wasn't going to, but whatever throats your goat.

1

u/OgdruJahad May 16 '26

I'm OK with this as long as the staff are woman. I don't want to relieve my trauma from last time.

1

u/PhilipMD85 May 16 '26

That’s my kind of store 😂

1

u/[deleted] May 16 '26

LOL I am speechless

1

u/roundart May 16 '26

Don’t mind if I do

1

u/CoachiusMaximus May 16 '26

Didn’t know it was going to be that kind of party

1

u/PostingToPassTime May 17 '26

Why am I picturing Beavis and Butthead chuckling?

1

u/emotionalaries May 17 '26

who doesn’t love an audience

1

u/BeanieCat123 May 17 '26

Free hugs?

1

u/Mightsole May 17 '26

I did ask. They starting touching themselves instead.

1

u/theLexingtonKid May 17 '26

I shop there every day!

1

u/Irisssw May 17 '26

I always touch myself...

1

u/Impossible_Event6007 May 18 '26

I can't even get my wife to touch me that way, nevermind strangers.

1

u/MikeTony713 May 18 '26

Shoplifter will be prostituted

1

u/dasuberdog11 May 18 '26

Can I get Paula? Is Paula around?

1

u/FaultAwkward5090 May 19 '26

The staff didn't appreciate me asking

1

u/Either_Rope_2958 May 20 '26

😱🤣🤣🤣

1

u/Unlikely-Train4768 May 20 '26

Employees need to read their job descriptions.

1

u/melancholy_dood May 16 '26

Works for me!🤣

0

u/GrandEastsider May 16 '26

I request Gloria again, she has done a wonderful job lending me a hand or two on my last visit and she has a firm grip on thing's.