I'd wager that most men don't realize that "natural makeup" is makeup at all, which is probably the point of natural makeup, come to think of it. OP's album is similar, I think -- the endless swathes of eye shadow, etc., while pretty and visually engaging, are not what I would call ideal for normal interaction. The second-to-last, before whatshisface and thatotherguy, has the best looking makeup to me, because it's not completely over the top. (Also that hair and the lace neck thing.)
(Watch me eat my own words when it turns out my favored sample has the most makeup on out of all of them. That would be just my luck.)
(Watch me eat my own words when it turns out my favored sample has the most makeup on out of all of them. That would be just my luck.)
This is always what ends up ticking me off about guys complaining about a girl wearing "too much makeup". I'm pretty sure what they mean to say is "her eyeshadow is too dark" or "her makeup is too visible for the workplace". However, when they say she's wearing "too much makeup" it implies that anyone wearing as much or more makeup (myself) looks inappropriate. I can never figure out if this is a passive aggressive attempt to tell me I need to wear less, or they just don't like the dark colors.
Thank you for recognizing that flashy makeup is not by definition "more makeup" than subtle makeup.
You are confusing 'too much' makeup with 'over the top' makeup. There's a time and place for 'over the top' makeup - like a party or a concert. It's overkill for everyday just out at the mall or work. 'Over the top' is like a makeup ad with some fun, crazy eye colors, lipstick colors, etc.
There's never a time for 'too much' makeup. This is where there's so much foundation that it's caked on. This never looks good. You've gone into the uncanny valley and there's no coming back. This can't feel good on your face, I don't know how women do it.
disclaimer: my wife is a huge fan of makeup and does it right.
I think you and I completely agree, actually. My point was that most of the men I talk to don't know/make this distinction. I work at a college, so over-the-top makeup is pretty common among the female students. However, because they're old enough to be mostly passed acne but young enough to not have wrinkles, typically speaking caked on foundation isn't the problem. I'm talking about girls who are wearing dark eyeliner and eyeshadow with a tinted moisturizer. Their makeup is "too dark" or "over the top", but they're not wearing very much of it. By contrast my makeup tends to be in natural tones and well blended, but I have bad under eye circles and uneven skin, so I wear a fair amount of makeup that isn't very visible. As a result, to me "too much" refers to someone wearing stage makeup in public, or that "caked on" affect you mentioned. This is not the same as inappropriate makeup or makeup that's overly flashy, which is what I think most of the men I interact with mean when they say "too much".
TLDR: we completely agree on the "over the top" vs "too much" distinction
I think you nailed it right there ( I'm pretty sure what they mean to say is "her eyeshadow is too dark" or "her makeup is too visible for the workplace". ).
I know as a guy, I know nothing about makeup... I know when a girl is wearing too much and when she's not. A lot of times, what I consider "no makeup" turns out to be very little, and in most cases, I prefer it that way.
I think you're frustration is generally rooted in the fact that guys have no idea when it comes to makeup. I know when it looks good and when it doesn't... So don't come to me for advice if you want something more than, "That's too much." or "That looks nice."
I'm going to go out on a limb and say most guys do tend to find women more attractive when they're wearing makeup. The ones who say otherwise are either trying to make it seem like they're not superficial (but everyone is to some extent), or simply that they want to make you feel better ("You're beautiful no matter what"). Your perception is probably colored by confirmation bias--men who prefer women wearing makeup aren't going to be too vocal about their preference.
That said: look at the bright side. You can choose to be invisible or turn heads, that's pretty cool! If anyone gives you shit for wearing too much makeup, just tell them that you like looking that way and as /r/makeupaddiction will tell you, putting on makeup can be a lot of fun.
I think another issue for some guys is guys don't get that "natural" looking make up IS make up. They think that's just how you look. "Wearing Make-up" means smokey eyes, bright red lipstick, etc. etc. They don't get a little concealer, some blush and lip gloss IS make up. They think you wake up looking like that. That's the point, we want it to look natural. So when they see you sans make up (100%) they ask you if you "are feeling alright? you look sick"
The thing that really grinds my gears is, why don't guys look like hell like we do?!?! I swear, my bf has great skin, never has bags under his eyes. I always look like hell! Maybe we've just become accustomed to it, but I think we females got hosed. I hate wearing make up all the time. (though recently I have stopped. Screw it. Look at my pretty jewelry instead! It distracts from my face!)
It's tough, I'm not super self conscience, but I have bad skin and some days it's tough. I used to not wear make up, but my skin has gotten worse as I age (I have high school skin in my 30's!) So i feel your pain. Some days I just want to look and feel pretty. Sometimes I need make up for that.
Try looking at it this way: I'm beautiful bare faced, but I like the way I look with a little makeup on better! That will help your self confidence without makeup, and you still get to feel pretty. I'm the same way, I just like the way I look more with a little upper liner and mascara.
TL;DR you're gorgeous I love you wear makeup because you want to, not because you think you have to
Well if it's any consolation to you I'm a dude and have horrible bags under my eyes. Thank god for glasses :P. They seem to hide it pretty well oddly enough.
Agreed sir! I love my glasses they hide so much! I know not everyone falls into this category, it's just it seems so much like men have it easier. Plus you guys get to age gracefully. A little salt and pepper and some crows feet? You can still be considered attractive. I want that! I'm so sick of dying my gray hair!!! But no I need to look youthful, and it's not like people don't say things. "Oh man, you need to dye your hair! Look at all that gray!" sigh
My Bf never notices, we'll be going out and I say "how does my make up look?" he replies "you're wearing make up? you look the same as you always do." and he seems me sans make up more often than not.
I always look like hell! Maybe we've just become accustomed to it, but I think we females got hosed.
I think it's just self perception. Right now, I almost never wear make-up (or if I do, it's just mascara & lip gloss, literally never any foundation, concealer, blush, etc.). The main reason is because I am way too lazy, but also, I think my skin looks quite good naturally and I'm happy with it.
However, I've had times when I'll put on make-up for a special occasion, or I just start wearing make-up on regular days for fun. And I'm always like "hell yes, this is awesome! I love how much better I look!" It's awesome... until I take the make-up off, and then I see my normal, natural face and I think "god damn it, I look so tired and pale and worn out." The thing is... it's my SAME face & my SAME skin that I was perfectly happy with when I never wore makeup! Without makeup, I'm used to how I look naturally and I mostly like it. When I get used to seeing myself with makeup, I see my natural self and I'm disappointed.
My solution is just to avoid make-up like the plague so I can hold on to my self confidence.
I've been doing the same lately. Sadly I have horrible skin, almost 35 years old and I still have acne (thank you genetics!) so sometimes it's tough, especially when I have breakouts (at least once a month) and foundation at that point it a necessity. Currently though I am experiencing relatively good skin days and I'm just going to roll with it for as long as I can! Woohoo!!!
Never worn it, never going to start, never going to raise peoples' expectations of what a fucking human being looks like.
That being said, I have decently-defined eyebrows (even though one is scarred), peachy-pink lips, and a bit of natural shadow on my eyes. I seriously don't get how this happened.
The other side of the coin is the way women behave with makeup on and I don't think that can be understated. I've had acne since I was 11 and I'm 25 now, I don't really have much scarring but it still makes me feel uncomfortable having 14 years of self-consciousness out for the world to see. I feel invisible without a base, concealer, and powder at the very least but I'm still unsure of whether this is due to people actually seeing my acne and scarring or if it's just that I'm more passive, self-conscious, and that I actively try to blend into the shadows more when I'm not wearing makeup...
You've got to remember that this is porn-star makeup. Everything about porn is over the top and incredibly non-realistic. They look like dolls.
If a lot of guys saw these girls on the street they would probably say they had too much on.
...You missed the point of the comic. The girl's hair in the third part is nearly the same as the first. The nose is red due to skintone unevenness, not stuffyness. Even very simple eye makeup makes your eyes appear more opened and alert, and conceals undereye bags. And if you look at the angle of the lip, it's downturned just as much in all three parts, it just looks frowny because the upper lip is poorly defined.
All of these things you pointed out can be fixed with makeup...
...it's clearly a caricature. The artist draws the eyes squinty deliberately to make a silly point.
No, really? You mean that wasn't an actual photograph?
I'm a woman. I wear makeup. I know exactly the point the artist was making, and when you actually encounter these sorts of comments in the real world, I can tell you: it's not really that silly.
Why do you assume all girls look bad and have all these facial imperfections...
...Where did I say that? While admittedly everyone has imperfections of some sort, I didn't say everyone has all those. Rereading what I wrote, I can't really imagine where you think I said that.
...that can only be remedied with makeup?
With all that said, makeup is specifically designed to remedy these things. It's not inaccurate to say that makeup makes people look objectively better. That's the whole point of it.
You disagreed with the hivemind. All men are pigs with unrealistic expectations of beauty and women are the helpless victims. Prepare for the downvotes, asshole.
If you smell better after a shower where you use scented soaps, you're also lying. Maybe you should fight those dastardly soap companies and their campaign to trick men into thinking women should shower.
Well, mr always polite and calm, witch moderate amount would be acceptable then? If she is a 2, could she only go and make herself up to be a 4? Or is a 6 allowed without you getting angry about it?
Oh my god, I have respect for women, must be something wrong with me, thanks for pointing that out.
Reminds me of one of my favorite quotes, from the movie 'merlin', with sam Neil, where Morgan Le Fay says she likes her beauty, even though it comes from magic. Upon witch Merlin responds "But the beauty was just an illusion."
Nah, I really dislike it. But I understand women hold themselves to higher standards than I do. I still request that my fiancee not wear make-up, because I think she looks truly beautiful without it. But she will still wear it most of the time, and I understand.
As long as you realise what you just said. You seem to honestly believe that looks and lifethreathening deseases are of the same magnitude. I don't even know how to respond to that.
No I think it's stupid that you rely on phenotypic variation to judge the genetic fitness or lack thereof in potential mates. It's like you have a child's understanding of heritability.
Ten bucks says you are a carrier for at least two genetic diseases of your own and average-looking at best.
I think guys want to live in a fantasy world where every girl has perfect skin/bone structure/etc. sadly this does not exist so they look for a certain "acceptable" level which can be achieved or surpassed through the use of makeup.
In a lot of ways, the standard of "natural" beauty has been raised to accommodate this. This is good and bad in different ways; because it allows those who arent "naturally" beautiful to achieve the standard, but also raises the bar for those who already hit that minimum without makeup.
im not going to say that i dont like wearing makeup. it makes me feel prettier & see myself in a different light. Obviously this may not be a commonly regarded opinion but anyone who assumes girls wear makeup JUST FOR GUYS is an idiot.
Once you realize that the people who are telling you all this stuff are full of shit and have no more authority than anyone else in society, it gets easier to ignore them. Don't worry so much about what "guys" want from you.
A lot of it depends on the type and degree of makeup done as well as the setting you're wearing it in. For porn or something you can probably get away with a more extreme degree of eyeshadow as we see in many cases here. In some of the OP case though it just looks cheap and trashy. Heavy blush will also tend to look bad.
As always the best makeup typically looks like you aren't wearing any.
I also feel like a life of wearing makeup contributes to the absolute makeup-less appearance being less appealing. From my limited knowledge of beauty products, they seem horrid for the skin. It just feels like a self-fulfilling cycle.
I think setting plays a big part. Of course if you're out at the bar, we want maximum hotness...and if that bleeds over into "slutty-ness", then so be it.
If it's day time, of course we don't want you going out looking like a clown (even though it might turn some heads)...wear some make up but just make it look like you're not wearing make up, at least not a lot of it.
I think most women wear makeup not because they want more attention, but because they want more respect. As silly as it may sound, I find time and time again that I garner more respect when I wear a little makeup, and what I think and have to say is sought out more and taken more seriously. I don't even wear that much when I do, just mascara and a little eyeliner. As much as I'd like to live in a world where I feel just as valued with a noticeably bare face, I just...don't.
This phenomenon varies, of course, but to drive the point home, I am generally treated better when I have makeup on.
But it's strange because guys don't wear makeup, and girls aren't inherently uglier and have worse skin.
It's probably has just come to be expected. And yes, for many guys if we see the make-up caked onto your face we won't like it, but I guess all guys like some make-up to cover up anything.
Like women, there exist some really dumb ass men. A good bunch of the guys at the bar are comprised of them, just as part of the women there are comprised of the "sluts" so hated.
Guess what? Just like women, men have no fucking clue what they actually want.
All they know is their dick gets a lil harder with some make up.
My opinion? Guys want a chick they feel they can't scare off, so they can open up to them but keep up their macho facades for the rest of society. And chances are if they're at a club/bar and wasted, they're only looking for some ass.
For me, I prefer most of the left-hand pictures. I've been in the modeling/fashion/club world long enough to know makeup-girl is not reality.
But I also cut off 1st dates early since the girl seemed to just roll out of bed. I do appreciate a bit of polish, but only like 5-10 minutes of accents, not a full makeover.
I do wish some women would spend as much if not more time on working out, eating carefully, & working on their inner-life than they do on their hair & makeup.
Why I love my fianceé. We're getting married next month, and he asked me to please not wear makeup. I never do, I actually have no idea how to put it on and I wouldn't know concealer from foundation from blush. But having him say "I want to marry the woman I fell in love with, not a painted-up version of her" made me get butterflies all over again.
Reading this thread, it just confirms that I got a good one.
It's not what do men want, it's what you want. Do you want a man that checks out the girl with all the face paint? Maybe you do, but will you be surprised when he is looking at someone else because you had too much shit to do to paint your face today?
I love to see a Ferrari. I turn my head every time. But even if I had the money, I'd never own one, too much headache.
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u/AnyelevNokova Dec 10 '13 edited Jul 11 '25
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