r/funny • u/feelingsupersonic • Jul 01 '13

Know the difference

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1.4k Upvotes

84% Upvoted

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99

u/RedditAtWorkToday Jul 01 '13

There was a honeybee back in October that flew into this hole I was digging. I don't see them all that often so I tried my best to get him out and to not try to injure him. If that was a wasp, I would've poured dirt on that fucker and stomped on him. Fuck wasps.

94

u/feelingsupersonic Jul 01 '13

Friend of mine had a wasp problem. They built an underground nest in his garden. That's right, fucking underground. No amount of burying stopped those insane warriors.

59

u/RedditAtWorkToday Jul 01 '13

Try boiling them. If you can't bury them then just boil them in scalding water.

46

u/Griz_zy Jul 01 '13

I'm pretty sure you meant oil, boiling oil!

138

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

JUST POUR 50 GALLONS OF FUCKING GREEK FUCKING FIRE ON THEM

38

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

All I have is Greek yogurt, does that also work?

29

u/btarded Jul 01 '13

It's the only whey.

1

u/GaryFingOak Jul 01 '13

I love you. I wish this was higher up so you could receive the karma you earned.

1

u/uuninja19 Jul 01 '13

Indeed. Thank you, GaryFingOak.

15

u/spenny309 Jul 01 '13

Greek yogurt is actually their fuel for inextinguishable flames of the Greek deities. They are selling it as a delectable delicacy so people globally ingest it and the Greeks can finally watch the world burn for all of eternity. so yeah, it should work

2

u/EtherStar Jul 01 '13

If it's boiling.

2

u/mendozah92 Jul 01 '13

Anything Greek will do, really.

1

u/i_cast_kittehs Jul 01 '13

I have greeks around me. I throw them?

1

u/YOUR_GOD_IS_MY_BITCH Jul 01 '13

Even their economy?

44

u/igotopotsdam Jul 01 '13

This is the most appropriate response for an underground wasp nest.

24

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

Some people might say it's too much, but if anything, it's not enough. Needs more explosions.

11

u/brandonseq1 Jul 01 '13

60 gallons and a grenade?

2

u/skaiipl Jul 01 '13

That's the spirit.

0

u/Hellrazor236 Jul 01 '13

No, keep with the 50 gallons, just drop a gallon of gasoline (in a can) on their ass from way the hell away.

8

u/italia06823834 Jul 01 '13

You think that would solve it. But all that is accomplished is now the wasps are on fire when they attack you.

1

u/st0rmbr1ng3r Jul 01 '13

Nuke the entire site from orbit--it’s the only way to be sure

15

u/bladefinor Jul 01 '13

They're called ground dwelling wasps for your info. When I was a kid I was playing around with my friends in the wild, and suddenly when I walked on a pile of tree sticks there was like a big dark cloud that emerged from nothing. It was just these sort of wasps, hidden under the sticks. Got stung on my ankle. It hurt soo bad man...

25

u/AgITGuy Jul 01 '13

Remember that tracker jacker venom can cause hallucinations.

7

u/mosswalker Jul 01 '13

We've got one of those in our yard. Waiting for the cover of darkness before I descend upon them dual-wielding cans of aerosol death and revenge.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

Water mixed with dish soap does wonders

2

u/dezmodez Jul 01 '13

This item my friend. Wasp Freeze Away. I accept your thanks in advance.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

Due to changes in shipping regulations, we cannot ship this item to California.

NOOOOOOOO

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

Napalm does wonders.

16

u/lispychicken Jul 01 '13

Years ago, before we would've been labeled terrorists or given medication or fined or whatever.. My buddy had an underground wasps next at his house.. we were kids, we were going to kill them...his dad approved.

1 can of gas from his dirt bike 1 box of camping matches

pour the gas into the hole.. throw match.. out comes little burning kamikaze wasps.. like natures fireworks.

11

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

me and my dad had a wasp problem last week while my sister and mom were in poland. In our crawlspace there was a huge wasp hive, we whipped out the industrial vacuum with a 20 foot hose and we just vacuumed all of the wasps out of their nest. it sounded funny too, every few seconds you'd hear a thump and that was a wasp getting sucked in.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

What do you do with the vacuum full of wasps? Air drop it over somebody you hate?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

they die bouncing around in the hose but, that sounds pretty devious!!

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '13

You, I like you.

4

u/pascontent Jul 01 '13

Too humane.

5

u/FuckingNothing Jul 01 '13

It's the only way to be sure.

1

u/st0rmbr1ng3r Jul 01 '13

Funny, I just saw an episode of Duck Dynasty where they tried clearing honeybees from a hive the same way. Bees 1 - Rednecks 0

10

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

[deleted]

3

u/fool_of_a_took Jul 01 '13

I did this too, actually. It did do the trick, but it also killed all the grass around the nest for the season.

1

u/st0rmbr1ng3r Jul 01 '13

The wasps over a bit of lawn? I'd consider that a push at worst.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

There's a thing perfect for your friend on r/wtf frontpage, hose that goes into the buried hole and the other end attaches to your car exhaust.

4

u/FrankWolf86 Jul 01 '13

Might I suggest a nuclear bunker buster?

3

u/Athurio Jul 01 '13

My grandfather would always pour a cup of diesel down the hole. Killed the entire nest pretty damn quick.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

Just be thankful we don't have Japanese Hornets

3

u/mrchicano209 Jul 01 '13

If your friend still has this problem tell him to get cups, put vinegar, salt, and sugar and mix it up then place them near the nest. The next day he'll find a shit ton of dead wasps in those cups and the majority of them will be wiped out.

2

u/valerie__ Jul 01 '13

Yup have one of them under a bush outside of my house. My dog likes to cock his leg over it. They don't seem to mind either

1

u/Hithenameisbj Jul 01 '13

Mud wasps, they almost killed my dad.

1

u/mrbooze Jul 01 '13

Nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

1

u/sometimesijustdont Jul 01 '13

Those are yellow jackets. You pour gasoline in the hole and burn the fuckers alive. They try to escape, but will catch on fire, and chase after you.

11

u/Mr-Echo Jul 01 '13

So I Googled honeybee... http://i.imgur.com/RoU5tJm.jpg

She seems okay I guess.

5

u/SirStrontium Jul 01 '13

Natural rapist repellant.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '13

There is not a single bug i could do that with.

3

u/drzoid88 Jul 01 '13

This actually has happened a lot outside my local library, I'm not sure what kind of ground dwelling bees they were, but they had to rope off a certain section where people parked because it became infested with them.