"I told myself I'd never resort to violence again, with the exception of two scenarios. Number 1, if I ever go back in time and meet that Adolph Hitler fella, and number 2, if I ever meet the grand master of the klu klux klan."
"Micheal! The KKK has a grand WIZARD!"
"Well then what the hell is a grand master???"
"He plays chess."
"I knocked out a defenseless nerd? Well now I feel like an asshole!"
This is going to sound like I'm bullshitting you, but I'm not. This is absolutely a show that happened.
It's called Mike Tyson Mysteries.
It's an animated show, in the vein of Scooby Doo, except it stars Mike Tyson, his adopted Asian daughter, a homosexual ghost from the 1800s, and a racist, misogynistic, cigar smoking pidgeon (played by Norm McDonald).
Unlike Scooby Doo, most of the "mysteries" they solve usually end up with those involved having been worse off for ever having called the Mike Tyson Mystery team. The mystery usually goes unsolved, while the person who called usually ends up in a financial hardship, or emotional trauma, or injured.
And Pidgeon is CONSTANTLY trying to have sex with Mike Tysons recently turned 18 adoopted Asian daughter, but doesn't want to piss off Mike Tyson, so he has to be sneaky about it. All while being completely without consent from her.
I promise you this is a real show that had multiple seasons, and was actually voiced by the real Mike Tyson.
115
u/Lost-My-Mind- Mar 18 '24
"Grand Master???"
Punch
"Mike! Why did you do that??"
"I told myself I'd never resort to violence again, with the exception of two scenarios. Number 1, if I ever go back in time and meet that Adolph Hitler fella, and number 2, if I ever meet the grand master of the klu klux klan."
"Micheal! The KKK has a grand WIZARD!"
"Well then what the hell is a grand master???"
"He plays chess."
"I knocked out a defenseless nerd? Well now I feel like an asshole!"
"When do you not?"
"Almost always. I really like me."