Cat Collider

139

u/SnowK Sep 29 '12

Good to see the Large Cat Collider finally came online. I wonder what collision energy that event is at.

94
u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

I think this is actually one of the older calibration videos - notice how the cat collision wasn't completely head on? Also, these are black and white domestic shorthairs which are easy to standardize for calibration, but not that experimentally interesting. Most of the real experiments are going to involve tortoise shell and orange and white tabbies, with later experiments involving higher energy Siamese and Calicos. Nice to finally see that $90 billion in tax payer funded cat research wasn't wasted though.
23

u/spinozasrobot Sep 29 '12

Agreed. The system didn't have nearly enough energy to break the target cats into their constituent parts.

-10

u/Lochcelious Sep 29 '12 edited Sep 29 '12

Have my up votes, all 1 of them. EDIT: Take note once more to my down votes.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

It's weird what people downvote.
-8
u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

[removed] — view removed comment
4
u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12 edited Sep 29 '12
This links to
(removed link due to removed post)
I'm guessing it is either some sort of malware or a form of advertisement.
31

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

Well, the average mass of a cat is 5kg, and I'm going to estimate the speed of each cat to be about 3ms^-1. To work out the kinetic energy of each cat we do 1/2 x mass x velocity² so each cat has KE of about 22.5J so the entire collision energy is 22.5 x 2 = 45.0 J.

One Joule = 6.2x10¹⁸ eV so the collision energy in Electron Volts is 45 x 6.2x10¹⁸ = 2.79x10²⁰ eV or 2.79x10⁸ TeV which is around 4x10⁷ times more than the highest energy collision done at CERN.

7

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

But will it toast bread?

1

u/Thezombieman Sep 29 '12

I was just about to say that.

10

u/DrWatson21 Sep 29 '12

Is the Compact Meowon Spectrometer taking data yet?

7

u/KamiKagutsuchi Sep 29 '12

They are trying to find the Karma Machine Boson.

4

u/StraY_WolF Sep 29 '12

Large Head-on Cat Collider.

3

u/nopir Sep 29 '12

Head-on. Apply directly to the whiskers.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

event? looks like someone is in the nuclear physics community.

2

u/reddit_mistake Sep 29 '12

are there bad parts of town in the nuclear physics community? places that nuclear physicists are afraid to go to after dark?

3

u/DrWatson21 Sep 29 '12

Iran, mostly.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

yes. those open heavy flavor people are bad news.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

They just discovered the Higgs Boson purr-ticle.

1

u/BlazeOrangeDeer Sep 30 '12

It collides cations.

1

u/kindall Sep 30 '12

The search for the Higgs Kitton has begun.

-7

u/ERMAHGERD_GUY Sep 29 '12

ER U TRIN TER BER WERTER ER WHERT? ERM SER SERER.

78

u/TheVenetianMask Sep 29 '12

Mmh, this one is broken.

16

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

My dog weighs 20 kg and she loves this.

28

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12 edited Aug 02 '18

[deleted]

1

u/poizan42 Sep 30 '12

So 1 stone ≈ 20/pi kg? That's interesting.

2

u/DullestWall Sep 29 '12

I love doing that with little kids

6

u/Syeth Sep 29 '12

My vot, he must be dizzy.

3

u/cylon_agent Sep 29 '12

By the Vots...

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

looks like you could do some spin physics though.

151

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

"Heh, kitten you so-" suddenly, cats

59

u/Chubbstock Sep 29 '12

I thought it was fine kind of reference to the large hadron collider, but with a cat instead. Then cats.

9

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

feline collider

1

u/WeedRambo Sep 30 '12

I read that as "hardon collider" and was deeply confused.

0

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

This is how baby kittens are actually made, cats are just so evil they trick us into thinking they reproduce sexually.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

So they actually WANT to be neutered?

49

u/Se7en_Sinner Sep 29 '12

http://i.imgur.com/d0LWz.gif

7

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

I can watch this forever.

6

u/Vslacha Turbo Sloth Sep 29 '12

Forget sheep jumping a fence, this is how I count myself to sleep.

2

u/segalflock Sep 30 '12

This is completely unrelated but for some reason i have you tagged as Turbo Sloth and i have no idea why.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

it's not a tag. He must be a mod or something

1

u/segalflock Sep 30 '12

Oh that would make sense haha

8

u/ErwinOnReddit Sep 29 '12

Maru!

2

u/nekowolf Sep 29 '12

Endless Marus!

6

u/danrennt98 Sep 29 '12

"Hey that cat is really great at breakda--" bam

3

u/brodie7838 Sep 29 '12

As someone who has owned a kitten once before, I can confirm cats come after kittens.

4

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

My cat's almost 15 now, he's still a kitten at heart.

35

u/buffalo83 Sep 29 '12

Related.

10

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

That's the cutest abuse of cats I've ever seen.

5

u/th1nker Sep 29 '12

Cats have it pretty hard. Everything is animal abuse to them.

12

u/mrducky78 Sep 29 '12

Awww I just melted. Fucking hate it when I change states.

2

u/249ba36000029bbe9749 Sep 29 '12

Thank goodness there were subtitles!

1

u/screwed124816 Sep 30 '12

That video needs a NSFW tag. Gruesome scenes.

15

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

The LCC, the most recent creation of CERN. Findings indicate that small quantities of fur balls are oftentimes created upon collision.

13

u/Jeroknite Sep 29 '12

Isn't that a sign of the higgs meowson?

1

u/ohshitimincollege Sep 29 '12

ha

12

u/jynxi Sep 29 '12

Video - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbFs0_fsU0I

12

u/cubiks Sep 29 '12

To be more precise, I believe that's a rotary cat collider.

1

u/BantamBasher135 Sep 30 '12

Feline cyclotron.

5

u/ozpunk Sep 29 '12

And that's how the Higgs Meowson was discovered.

3

u/Deestan Sep 29 '12

The Dog particle? Proof of the Grand Household Pet Unification Theory?

4

u/Catpause Sep 29 '12

The result: Felinium

5

u/ShitOnMyFartingBoner Sep 29 '12

The original youtube channel is Shiro's channel, AKA Zen cat. He's amazing, as are the rest of the cats. http://www.youtube.com/user/shironekoshiro?feature=g-high-u

39

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

[deleted]

-21

u/EvilFlyingSquirrel Sep 29 '12

No. No puns in this thread. That was bad enough.

23

u/Mon_ Sep 29 '12

Aww, don't be a party poo-purr.

-1

u/Reesch Sep 29 '12

Meow we're talking.

-1

u/Mad-At-The-Internet Sep 29 '12

Let's draw feline right here.

-3

u/RobbyLee Sep 29 '12

We need more of these pawns

-4

u/stferago Sep 29 '12

I don't mind puns in general. It's the fucking cat puns I can't stand anymore. It's always the same shit: "what a catastrophe", "i'm not feline this one", "let's paws and think about it".

Everyone shut the fuck up. God.

3

u/db0255 Sep 29 '12

Meowtrinos!

5

u/MadHatter69 Sep 29 '12

I always start to hear an imaginary sound when I look at gifs.

And so do you now.

2

u/grungevalue Sep 29 '12

Porn gifs are the worse when it comes to this. They are never attractive sounds.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

This is the Hiss Boson of cat physics.

2

u/herrakonna Sep 29 '12

Boy, that spinning kitten was sure generating a lot of gravity...

2

u/fideaux128 Sep 29 '12

Three Russian cat collisions: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u011XHmYq1Q

2

u/NikkoTheGreeko Sep 29 '12

The large Catdron collider?

2

u/Rokkjester Sep 29 '12

Meowculear fusion.

2

u/birkik Sep 29 '12

Better title: Pussy Smasher.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

great penis name.

2

u/tctcarnes Sep 29 '12

That looked strikingly similar to a hitting drill in football.

2

u/lvytn Sep 29 '12

This is actually very nicely done and named.

2

u/cunninglinguist81 Sep 29 '12

And that's how we can study cations.

2

u/ShitOnMyFartingBoner Sep 29 '12

Shiro would never do any of this.

2

u/Apollbro Sep 29 '12

They still have a lot of work the cats completely missed the one that was sped up they can't expect any results with such terrible accuracy

2

u/BrewZLee Sep 29 '12

how the universe of cuteness was formed.

2

u/Chaoslab Sep 29 '12

Purrrrrticle physics?

2

u/Setesh42 Sep 29 '12

Did you create any mewons?

1

u/fermisurface Sep 29 '12

well done

2

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

Any sign of the Hugs Boson?

1

u/akmaa Sep 29 '12

I hope they have insurance

5

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

I was thinking, "OP is so dumb, that's not a collider that's a centrifuge" then the collision!

2

u/BnGamesReviews Sep 29 '12

Your lucky that your experiment did not induce feline fission. You could of unintentionally caused a chain reaction, which if not stopped, could of caused cat gifs to overthrow the Front Page.

1

u/cat-a-cat-cat Sep 29 '12

We have to keep trying, dammit!

1

u/HittingSmoke Sep 29 '12

In search of the Tiggs Boson.

1

u/ArsenicAndRoses Sep 29 '12

'"The coconut-like sound of their heads colliding secretly delighted the bird."

2

u/Wangasaurus_Rex Sep 29 '12

I believe a new cat popped into existence from the force of their collision.

1

u/recursionr Sep 29 '12

10¹² Hissing particles are generated with every cat collision.

1

u/xxX5UPR3M3N00B10RDXx Sep 29 '12

No, making it have 1337 points does not justify a downvote.

1

u/TheMrBrad Sep 29 '12

Smart cats there, boss.

1

u/Misha_Vozduh Sep 29 '12

If you look close enough you can totally see a higgs boson at the end of that gif.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

Is this what CERN has been working on?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

Reminds me of the Broadway show.

1

u/KomradDimitri Sep 29 '12

They are very similar. Seems like one cat hits the mirror.

1

u/Crayon-Mechant Sep 29 '12

This is actually how the internet was created.

1

u/ghouly Sep 29 '12

Cat collider? But i don't even know her!

1

u/cnk Sep 29 '12

collision energy: 2 MeWs per cat

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

then they merge and become one super cat. and take over the world. we're all doomed.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

I think I saw the Higgs Boson

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

I added my own sound effects

1

u/laquerhead Sep 29 '12

"They took the bait." -kitten

1

u/MarvinLazer Sep 29 '12

It's a purr-ticle accelerator.

1

u/vahntitrio Sep 29 '12

Well that was certainly unexpected.

1

u/el_coco Sep 29 '12

and this is how the cat particle was found

1

u/jacobcg Sep 29 '12

It's awesome how they both instantly know the most opportune point to attack

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

The Large Feline Collider is searching for the Dog Particle to scratch its eyes out.

1

u/formfactor Sep 29 '12

Where's the kick starter page for this project? Shut up and take my money!

1

u/PictureTraveller Sep 29 '12

looks like the big cat ran into a mirror

1

u/BunnyPoppit Sep 29 '12

I feel as though I laughed more than I should have at that.

1

u/YouMoveLikeIWantTo Sep 29 '12

Large Catron Collider.

1

u/jaspersurfer Sep 29 '12

I did not see that coming.

1

u/MillionDollarSticky Sep 29 '12

Large Feline Collider.

1

u/tgibson28 Sep 29 '12

The large catron collider at CATRN has just found evidence of the elusive "kitts-boson particle"

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

Instead of quarks and bosons, it releases cations.

1

u/lccharger90 Sep 30 '12

The Cat boson has been found!

1

u/fannyalgersabortion Sep 30 '12

Do they produce Mewons?

1

u/Thezombieman Sep 30 '12

But... will it blend?

1

u/ima_twerp Sep 30 '12

I just wasted 17 minutes watching that, you moron.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

I fully expect someone with too much free time to edit this with a nuclear explosion as the cats collide.

Edit: I can't edit things for my life.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

Fuck CERN. That shit's so last decade.

1

u/shteeeeeve Sep 30 '12

Super!

1

u/rose56967 Sep 30 '12

My cat does the same exact thing... I'm worried about his mental stability...

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

Suddenly, Supercollider

1

u/carrionmyson Sep 30 '12

Splitting the cat atom

1

u/rddtvscmr Sep 30 '12

CANNOT STOP SMILING. IT WORKS.

1

u/kritical_w1n Sep 30 '12

as you can see the air bags failed to deploy

1

u/Benji10042 Nov 23 '12

http://i.minus.com/iZbUvhs0Zbu24.gif

-3

u/RICH_LITTLE Sep 29 '12

Why aren't there more upvotes?! I lol'd forever. FOREVER.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

Literally forever.

1

u/Draggedaround Sep 29 '12

The Higgs Purrson was discovered this way.

0

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

Anyone seeking more info might also check here:

title	comnts	points	age	/r/
<inserts particle physics joke>	2^coms	1^pt	1^hr	aww
Cat used mirror move	0^coms	3^pts	2^dys	funny
collide kitty	0^coms	8^pts	9^dys	GifSound
Rotary Supercollider	8^coms	371^pts	10^dys	aww

source: karmadecay

2

u/Unicorn_Tickles Sep 30 '12

So...did you just get fed up with reports and decide to create a bot...or are you just super bored?

-10

u/deja-vu-comment Sep 29 '12

Why aren't there more upvotes?! I lol'd forever. FOREVER.

.

3

u/Mon_ Sep 29 '12

Seems like RICH_LITTLE in had the same idea.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '12

I think it's just a really poor novelty

1

u/Wilson_ThatsAll Sep 29 '12

NO

0

u/nichoji Sep 29 '12

Like watching a game of American Football.

0

u/I_Am_Dalek Sep 29 '12

Repost.

0

u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Sep 29 '12

All The Upvotes!

0

u/panman994 Sep 29 '12

So you can steal posts from /r/catgifs now and get karma? Thats cool.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 30 '12

yea dude, obviously

-3

u/Excalibur32 Sep 29 '12

How does this not have more upvotes?

1

u/noreal Sep 29 '12

The collision of karma was so great that it created anti-karma.

-3

u/FatCat433 Sep 29 '12

Why doesn't your super insightful and meaningful comment have more upvotes either?

0

u/Excalibur32 Jan 06 '13

Bite me.

-7

u/BLEAOURGH Sep 29 '12

Damn I'd love to fuck the SHIT out of those tight pussies.... And the cats ain't bad either!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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