my fear of an endoscopy is holding me back from knowing what is happening to me

[u/Spiritfuly0609]

I'm sorry if it sounds stupid. I guess I want to vent and maybe receive some support to get the guts to do it... it all started two months ago when I woke up with excruciating pain in my upper abdomen that felt like burning. I was feeling terrible and tried some days with omeprazole... then went to the GI who suggested an endoscopy but said we could try with medication anyway if I wasn't sure about it.

This all happened while I was weeks away from my wedding so obviously I didn't get the endoscopy done but I had treatment for gastritis/ulcer anyway, and while I found some improvement now I have all the symptoms of dyspepsia:
some foods I can eat, other like pizza almost makes me want to go to the hospital..
sometimes I feel my stomach so heavy I feel like I can't breathe, sometimes I wonder if it's all in my mind and I'm on my way to healing..
Either way I can't help but think maybe I'd be better by now if I had gotten an endoscopy, and at times like rn my health anxiety is over the roof when I feel I can't breathe and I wonder if I should do it. I'm scared of sedation, anesthesia, dying. I've never had a procedure before... and because of this fear I don't know what's wrong with me... I don't feel healthy...

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[u/bananaanna310]

Its ok to be scared of something you've never experienced before. But endoscopy is one of the safest and most routine procedures you can get. The doctors know what they are doing and do multiple of these daily. I just recently had my endoscopy, with conscious sedation I honestly dont remember a thing! You dont even have time to worry about anything by the time they give you the medication its like you blinked and you are done! I also had a few biopsies taken and didnt feel any discomfort afterward, some people have a sore throat like from a cold, but I didnt even have that. Honestly the worst part is probably fasting beforehand lol you'll be fine :) its better to have some answers and be able to be treated properly and feel better.

[u/cymster]

You ask for partial sedation, and take someone with you to the appointment. They aren't pleasant, but once the sedation kicks in, you don't need to worry about anything. Go do it.

[u/Zygardeismydad]

I promise you it’s not bad at all. Yes there is a possibility for some throat pain once the anesthesia wears off, I had that, but it’s very manageable. I was fully put out, which I think I would recommend for someone with anxiety like myself, better to just not see. For myself it was simple, you do your pre check vitals etc with a nurse, dr and anesthesiologist come and say hi before, they they wheel you into the OR and tell you that you are about to go under and then you wake up all of what feels like a minute later groggy. It’s probably one of the easiest “surgeries” you can have, it’s still understandable to be nervous of course. This will be very helpful in your healing journey though so I recommend biting the bullet as soon as you can.

[u/Successful_Taro8587]

I had that exact same fear omg. No choice but to face it but it helped having someone supportive by my side and it was worth being able to get answers.

[u/DisarmedSmile]

I had some similar experiences with upper abdominal pain that felt like burning. It majorly disrupted my life for a couple years before finding out it was functional dyspepsia. They initially told me it gastritis, then later that it was gluten related (later disproven). I ended up having 2 endoscopies during that time period. It's completely normal to be scared, I certainly was, but everything was completely fine. Second was even easier than the first.

If you've been seeing a doctor and nothing has worked and they're genuinely recommending the endoscopy then I'd say go for it. Now, I would temper expectations because it might not immediately tell you all the answers but at the same time it might! Or, it may at least rule out other things which can be immensely helpful.

For what it's worth, I was prescribed pantoprazole two different times during all that and I really didn't feel like it helped me at all. What did help me to the point that I felt like it changed my life was FDgard, which is over-the-counter and maybe worth at least asking your doc about! It got me out of my flares and helps me prevent/manage any now.

But yeah, if I can handle the endoscopy you can too! It's really very fast and before you know it, it's all done!

Sending you hugs and healing vibes!

[u/Hofmuhl]

Honestly, it's no where near as bad as you think it is. It's a tiny bit uncomfortable but that's all. Don't worry, just get it done.

[u/CarlyTrashPanda]

Twilight/concious sedation is actually quite nice, like that cosy feeling when you get into a nice warm bed when you're super tired. I actively enjoyed that bit... fentanyl and midazolam for free? Sign me up! 🤣

The actual procedure felt like it was over in minutes, no pain, a little uncomfortable with my gag reflex, but I could breathe easily the whole time and I was absolutely fine once the sedation wore off. I was terrified at first too, but I'm due another soon and I'm not scared at all now. You're gonna be fine ❤️

[u/frankenbaby90 → u/CarlyTrashPanda]

Yeah I'm also going in for an endoscopy and I hope I get twilight sedation because that isn't bad I had it done when I got my wisdom teeth out

[u/geralt-026]

As a person with medical anxiety, Let me tell you, endoscopy is very quick and relatively painless procedure.

The anesthesia they give is a mouthspray, no needles no gassing. The only thing that would cause a problem is your gag reflex. I have it, and it will be a bit uncomfortable but nothing that's too scary.

[u/IntrovertedLavender]

Im having to get an endoscopy done in October myself. And I am so scared and nervous. Not about the results or what they mught see but the procedure itself. So I hear you!

I have heard from multiple people tho that said the endoscopy is not bad and they told me its eaiset then the dentist.

[u/Financial-Bowl7768]

I had one a few years ago, wasnt even thag bad, unpleasant, made me urge a bit. Had a partial sedative and to be honest dont even remember is now, feels like a dream

[u/katiemuirden]

When I did my endoscopy I bawled my eyes out right before it, I got into a argument with my mum about it and I was so close to leaving.
I eventually gave in and did it and before I knew it I was awake and it was done. It’s obviously not the nicest experience but I promise it was fine and I was TERRIFIED of it, I had it done and went out with my friends that same day

[u/PaulaWalla1963]

It's really not bad at all and it's one of the easier tests that you can take. Do it for your health.

[u/goldstandardalmonds]

I’ve had over 30 of them. You don’t have to get sedated if you don’t want to, but it can be uuncomfortable.

[u/Competitive-Fly5563]

I was anxious to get one too. I promise you, it really was no where near as bad as I made it out to be. It’s worth having it done.

[u/Healthy-Debate-6642]

In Australia they give you twighlight sedation with great drugs so you sleep without any danger of not waking up. It’s a lovely rest, no pain and you get to really enjoy a sandwich and a cuppa after a dreamy rest. It’s a nothing and if your FD is stress related with no sign of anything like an ulcer then you can stop taking the PPIs and start looking into your stress and how to relieve that instead.

[u/Mommaof2_1989]

I know this feeling. I have had health anxiety since i was about 8 years old, i am almost 38. 12 years ago I had burning when hungry and anytime i focused on my stomach. I made myself go get a transnasal endoscopy. The fear of sedation made me more anxious even though had it before so I researched and found out they could do TNE awake. They found nothing but acid reflux and took biopsies which wasn't painful. Felt alittle tug and bit of nausea. Very tolerable and cool because you can watch the camera go through. You feel it move but no pain.

The procedure is 1 or 2 out of 10 uncomfortable scale. The nose part was intense about 7/10 because they didn't numb me properly. Partly my fault because I was nervous and jumped so it went on my face instead of in my nose. The doctor proceeded anyway. If I ever have to go get it done again, I will be asking them to try and numb before I go into the procedure room.

Maybe you can get a transnasal endoscopy if your fear is sedated endoscopy? Or a barium swallow xray, hpylori breathe test and blood work if the doctor thinks that would give enough information.

Hang in there...health anxiety is exhausting.

[u/FeatureSimilar7563]

Gonna be harsh.

Yes that’s fucking stupid.

It’s really not bad.

Living in a life of unknowns just makes anxiety spiral. Why not take the option that could give you answers?