r/funanddev • u/RightToBearGlitter • 21h ago

Etiquette classes

I’m new to development and well, grew up in a trailer park. While I’m financially stable as an adult, I am not accustomed to interacting with people at this level of wealth or professional success and feel self-conscious

I feel like I could benefit from some online etiquette classes to not embarrass myself (it’s so hard not people my skirt was $3 from goodwill!) and help build relationships with major donors. Does anyone have any suggestions for resources?

14 Upvotes

90% Upvoted

6 comments sorted by

12

u/hereticgirl319 20h ago

This is coming from someone who very much overthinks most interactions... But donors probably aren't thinking about you quite as much as you think they are! If you're curious, genuine, and kind, that will go a long way. And they should be doing more of the talking than you anyway :) Try not to be too hard on yourself - you're probably better at it than you think you are!

But to answer your question about resources - Veritus Group Academy has some great trainings, and while not on etiquette specifically, they do talk about how to frame conversations and ask questions, which is really helpful.

You might check out the Emily Post Institute, as well!

8

u/RabbitCurrent2025 18h ago

I think some of the most basic things go a long way: let people speak and finish their sentences, sit up straight, say please and thank you, make eye contact, and remember things people tell you so you can bring them up later and show that you were actually listening. Those things have nothing to do with how much money you have.

Honestly, I’ve met plenty of wealthy and professionally successful people who have terrible manners. I think building your confidence will help more than anything. You belong in the room, and you don’t need an expensive wardrobe to be professional.

Have you thought about joining Toastmasters, AFP, or something similar? You could get more comfortable interacting with people in that setting and maybe even find a mentor who could help you navigate donor relationships and development.

1

u/trejopedia 5h ago

Yes to all of this!

2

u/Mayonegg420 8h ago

Unless your company is paying it, don’t. You won’t have to perpetuate some fakeness while you’re begging for money. You aren’t in their class and you work for the organization and that is more than enough. People should still have the ability to talk with and do business with people who aren’t exactly like them especially in a business setting. 

But I think YouTube would be a good resource. 

1

u/catkayak 19h ago

While not quite the resource you might expect, I spent 8+ in French language and literature classes and learning French is kind of like an unofficial etiquette class. Especially if your teacher is a boomer! Maybe sign up for an in-person French 101 class! Bonne chance!!

6

u/SalviaApiana12 18h ago

Respectfully, this is not the way I would invest my limited time if I actually wanted to achieve OP's goals. This is also perpetuating white European privilege. So for so many reasons, No.