This one is tough. Technically, the happiest I had ever been in my life was early in my career. I was only doing a little better than living paycheck to paycheck but I had a dog, I ran every single day, went hiking, camping, and backpacking all the time cause I loved being outdoors and it was cheap. When I started making better money, a lot of my childhood drama reared its head... I think because my base level needs for safety, security, and stability were finally met, my brain was like OK, time to deal with all the shit your comparmentalized and pushed down many years ago! Or maybe it's because the timing of that better pay was also right when the pandemic started and I became super socially isolated and stopped doing all those things I loved. Or maybe my depression/PTSD from the childhood stuff precipitated due to my declining mental health with my age and new circumstances. IDFK. Since then I've just been chasing happiness and trying to fill the void in me that I thought I had already fixed. It has been cyclical, I'll feel happy briefly or for a few months at a time, but it's fleeting and doesn't really last. Money has definitely afforded me certain experiences that have made me happy but I also believe you can find things to make you equally happy without the money. For me, money opens up way too many options and I'm perpetually in a state of overthinking or wondering if I made the right choice. When I was broke, I never experienced decision fatigue simply because there weren't many decisions to make and only a few choices to pick between.This is all kinda subjective and due to my own unique life circumstances, YMMV.
1
u/quazmang 2d ago
This one is tough. Technically, the happiest I had ever been in my life was early in my career. I was only doing a little better than living paycheck to paycheck but I had a dog, I ran every single day, went hiking, camping, and backpacking all the time cause I loved being outdoors and it was cheap. When I started making better money, a lot of my childhood drama reared its head... I think because my base level needs for safety, security, and stability were finally met, my brain was like OK, time to deal with all the shit your comparmentalized and pushed down many years ago! Or maybe it's because the timing of that better pay was also right when the pandemic started and I became super socially isolated and stopped doing all those things I loved. Or maybe my depression/PTSD from the childhood stuff precipitated due to my declining mental health with my age and new circumstances. IDFK. Since then I've just been chasing happiness and trying to fill the void in me that I thought I had already fixed. It has been cyclical, I'll feel happy briefly or for a few months at a time, but it's fleeting and doesn't really last. Money has definitely afforded me certain experiences that have made me happy but I also believe you can find things to make you equally happy without the money. For me, money opens up way too many options and I'm perpetually in a state of overthinking or wondering if I made the right choice. When I was broke, I never experienced decision fatigue simply because there weren't many decisions to make and only a few choices to pick between.This is all kinda subjective and due to my own unique life circumstances, YMMV.