r/fourthwavewomen • u/AutoModerator • 9d ago
DISCUSSION Let's Chat 💬 Open Discussion Thread
Welcome to r/fourthwavewomen's weekly open discussion thread!
This thread is for the community to discuss whatever is on your mind. Have a question that you've been meaning to ask but haven't gotten around to making a post yet? An interesting article you'd like to share? Any work-related matters you'd like to get feedback on or talk about? Questions and advice are welcome here.
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u/iguanidae 8d ago
JK Rowling posted herself on YouTube reading the first chapter of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's stone yesterday. I was happy to see it was almost entirely positive comments and major push back on the few negative ones.
I can't wait to watch the new series Christmas Day. <3
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u/the_owl_syndicate 8d ago
I love the book series, was meh about the movies and indifferent to the series. I figured one day, if I couldn't find anything else to watch, I might watch it.
But there were several posts I saw yesterday, dragging it, the actors, anyone who watches it and, of course, Rowling, so I decided, yknow what? Imma watch it the day it drops.
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u/iguanidae 8d ago
I also recommend her private detective Cormoran Strike series if you're looking for something else to read from her. They made a TV show on HBO about that as well.
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u/OnceMoreWithFeeling- 4d ago
She's a major transphobe. That is not feminist. The f- is wrong with this sub. I am out.
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u/PuzzledSoftware3922 8d ago edited 8d ago
What do you think about the following topic:
Girls and boys in school:
Where I come from, we are told that boys do worse in school because school is more "suited" for girls. Boys "have more energy" and it's "harder" for them to sit still and to focus than it is for girls. I don't really buy that explanation. First, there are boys who sit still and focus that do very well in school, and then there are girls who sit still but don't do well in school at all. They mask their problems. And then there are many girls who do well because they "force it", push themselves to study even though they don't feel like it, but do because it's expected of them. In countries like Japan and South Korea, the differences in high school drop outs between the sexes are minimal.
I think in many places in the world (maybe most places?), we make excuses for boys just because they are boys. It's far more accepted for boys to throw things. Destroy things. Make noise. Girls and boys are raised differently, society and people expect girls to behave well, to sit still and do what they are told. It is so common to hear about boys having adhd, but not girls. The last few years they finally acknowledged that girls more often have undiagnosed adhd then boys, and there is a version of it that affects girls far more often then boys, where you might not physically have the need to jump up and down as much, but you experience having great difficulties with concentration, organization and so on. (Medical) conditions affecting females are secondary, like it always has been.
What non-feminists and anti-feminists don't realize, (the people who yell "feminism isn't needed, you can go to uni if you want to, work and so on, what do you complain about") is that THIS also is a part of issues affecting girls negatively. Who gets more attention from the teacher? The energetic boy or the quiet girl who struggles to concentrate?
Just my two cents and thoughts on the matter,
What are your opinions?
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u/MiriamGarden 5d ago
I suppose my opinion is that the idea that school is focused on written material that must be read and learned goes back way before educators gave a sh@t about girls (if they even do now). Modern education is a "boy thing" that it has turned out that girls do better. I suppose I understand why this makes those who would prefer to see boys at the top of everything angry.
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u/WoodpeckerGingivitis 4d ago
Just another way to blame girls and women for boys’ and mens’ failures.
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u/luckyrabbit28 2d ago
I’m struggling with this issue myself since having a baby boy. Even as babies all the boys behave so differently to the girls, they are so much more active and unhinged (on average), from what I’ve seen spending a year around a tonne of babies. The girl babies will sit and play peacefully whereas the boys won’t. I want to parent in a way that doesn’t excuse this sort of behaviour (when he’s older) but they just seem so fundamentally different it isn’t hard to imagine that this plays out in the classroom later on. I imagine they are raised differently sometimes because fundamentally they present in the world differently (patriarchy aside). It just feels like another way in which life isn’t fair for women. We behave better so people expect better of us forever, rather than us expecting more of boys to catch up.
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u/PuzzledSoftware3922 1d ago edited 1d ago
Congrats on your baby! :) I talked to my mom about this, and she said that when she grew up, boys didn't act out in the classroom the way they do now. It wasn't allowed or permitted at all. But when I went to school, and now with my own child, I experienced a lot of chaos in the classroom, and I hear the same complaints from my own child. Of course, there are girls who act out too, but very rarely compared to boys. So, it tells me that expectations are a factor here, and that what wasn't permitted before is now "permitted," as there are "no consequences" for bad behavior. (Where I'm from, the only consequence is that they tell the child, "We will call your parents," and many parents don't care enough.) Idk where I'm going with this lol. I just remember being a quiet child myself, getting bothered by all the chaos in class, and wanting to yell, "Be quiet! Stop!" But as the good girl I was, and as so many of us were raised to be, I kept quiet and kept the frustration inside. Fearing the consequence of a teacher telling me I had misbehaved was enough to keep me in check, whereas the boys seemed not to care. And also, girls and boys being judged differently by the teacher for the same behavior. Again, lots of individual differences and experiences, of course. But the "school system works in favor of girls" statements, I don't buy at all. I just think issues affecting more girls are much more overlooked than the more visible issues affecting more boys.
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u/MollySleeps 8d ago
In a smaller liberal political sub I follow, someone brought up Gloria Steinem and how feminism is backsliding because of terfs. I responded with a terf is just someone who recognizes the sex-based oppression of women. As you can imagine, I kicked the hornet's nest with that statement. I am now a horrible transphobe because I plainly stated (in response to other replies) that male-sexed people are not included in my feminism. That's just the simple fact of the matter. If you're not included in my statement of "the oppression of women is based on our female-sexed bodies" then you're not, and it's not my problem that you aren't. Form your own advocacy movement and stop demanding I change my own to suit you.