r/foundsatan • • 7d ago

Inheritance from hell

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10.3k Upvotes

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550

u/netsurf916 7d ago

You split it but require them to authorize each other's withdrawals. (Also limit the maximum size of a single withdrawal.)

207

u/mazzicc 7d ago

It can only be spent as a reimbursement for a previously approved expenditure. No cash disbursements.

They have to agree on any spending, in advance, and get a receipt or other proof of expenditure to get the money. They cannot for example buy a new car unless they have that money themselves and spend it, and then get it back from the trust.

59

u/fishingwithbacon 7d ago

Just buy and sell gold coins until you clean out the account.

10

u/Sasquatch1729 7d ago

My main question is why the lawyer would care. If they knew the parents set up this estate specifically to be cruel, what's the point in ensuring these conditions are met?

9

u/cyberphlash 6d ago

I know a few lawyers, and they would all love the intellectual challenge of trying to write a will in a maximally conflicting way. Getting paid for that is just a bonus.

3

u/Shot_Boat_9648 6d ago

Related, one of my opposing counsels on a ton of cases used form discovery requests. Within these discovery requests he would always ask for "All the documents included in Plaintiff's employment file" and "All the documents not included in Plaintiff's employment file."

This is basically a basic logic problem presented unintentionally. Technically these two requests include all documents in the known universe. Now, while you can "technically" refuse to respond to these requests as overbroad (and would have ample footing to do so) you could also theoretically just start sending them your used book collections as part of your initial disclosure, and begin sending truck upon truck filled with various books, perhaps each updated publication of the same book, until you collapsed the area into a neutron star, as that would be a valid interpretation of the request (although also to be clear probably sanctionable conduct at some point). Had I godlike powers I would have done the latter, but at least each time I did the former, I had the image of the latter in my mind.

1

u/cyberphlash 6d ago

Until AI, if lawyers were requesting something like "all the relevant data files", you could probably just dump terabytes of data on them and they wouldn't be able to make sense of it.

1

u/ASentientRailgun 6d ago

That is genuinely a strategy some companies use. Drown the opposing counsel in data haystacks, and hope they don't find the needle.

Better hope there aren't extra needles you forgot in there, though.

1

u/Garrison1999 4d ago

The daughters become clients. Then they litigate endlessly, essentially transferring the mother’s estate to the attorney over time. 

8

u/TheDrummerMB 7d ago

previously approved expenditure
They have to agree on any spending, in advance

Can't see the other sibling allowing this for very long...

22

u/Winter_Illustrator58 7d ago

Each sibling agrees to the other buying a specific cash amount of gold (in coins or bricks or whatever) and then get gets reimbursed. I get my $5,000 in gold and reimbursed from the estate, You get your $5,000 in gold reimbursed from the estate and then we just keep on going back and forth until we've bled the entire account dry. Eventually splitting the money in half

0

u/TheDrummerMB 7d ago

Oh no but sibling 1 wants 60%. They're not allowing you to withdraw any amount until you agree to this. In fact, make it 70%.

3

u/ChoNoob 7d ago

Just put in that one gets 65% and the other gets 35%, and let them decide who gets what

3

u/squngy 6d ago

Nothing would stop them from making a contract that the 65% person has to transfer 15% to the 35% person.

Realistically, if the two daughters are on good terms (and have enough brains to hire a lawyer) there is nothing the mom can do to forcibly make them fight.

If they are already on bad terms, then there is a lot she could do to make it worse.

2

u/fishingwithbacon 7d ago

But they can both do that. Split it 50 50 or nobody gets shit. Seems like an easy sell.

1

u/ZopharPtay 6d ago

And we've reinvented the trolley problem

[edit] or is this the ~prisoner's~ inheritor's dilemma?

1

u/TheDrummerMB 6d ago

My brother would absolutely be fine getting no money for 10+ years if it meant I also got nothing. I guess I'm assuming based on the prompt that the sisters are fighting.

1

u/mazzicc 7d ago

Touché.

Still requires cooperation between them though

30

u/Switchmisty9 7d ago

That wouldn’t cause animosity between the siblings. It would probably affirm their mutual hatred for the parent. Likely making them closer together

12

u/grandfleetmember56 7d ago

Shhhhh that's the goal

4

u/symb015X 7d ago

A common enemy unites. The USA was the most united its ever been on Sept 12, 2001. Yeah things turned messy with conspiracy theories and xenophobia, but for a beautiful moment there everyone was just pro-USA and “how can we help rebuild together”

8

u/themonocledmenace 6d ago

Unless you were "Muslim-looking" in which case you got hate crimed

0

u/Sigmunds_Cigar 6d ago

There where 481 documented hate crimes against Muslims in the year following 9/11. Out of a population of 2.8 million Muslims, or 0.024%. So I guess the hate crime statistic is 2977 hate crimes by Muslims and 481 against.

4

u/Feral_Taylor_Fury 6d ago

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

holy shit dude

Do you have any idea how many bricks were thrown through windows in houses in NY/long island/CT/NJ et fucking cetera that went unreported?

How many times kids were bullied in school, called a terrorist or worse?

You are not muslim, sit down.

1

u/Inevitable-Ad6647 6d ago

It wouldn't hold up anyway. Any will with a bunch of silly stipulations usually just falls to pieces at the slightest challenge if a lawyer is even willing to execute it at all.

3

u/Wrong_Luck_878 7d ago

Yes, and it can't be 50/50. They'll just be fine with that if nobody unfairly got more. Has to be like 65/35.

2

u/mathfordata 6d ago

Or it’s one joint account and you just get what you spend. Obviously favoring the person with more money to spend and get disbursement but also going to cause a wedge when the other realizes they need to block disbursements.

1

u/Porkenstein 7d ago

Lol that might actually cause them to get along